Breakdown Pixie Cut

Hi guys, what's up, my name is maryam and i just cut my hair into a weird pixie cut. I did it myself and then i went to the salon to fix it. I wasn't intending to have a pixie cut. It was i had this feeling that i want to grow up my hair, but i didn't now. I have a pixie cut. How do i feel about it? I don't know anyway. I um had like a mini breakdown and i just chopped my hair off. It'S been a week um and i then went to the salon to fix my hair because it was really up in the back now she's like she kind of fixed it and i'm trying to work with my pixie cut. So you man, like life, is so weird. I was not planning to have a pixie cut and then i woke up one day and i just chopped my hair off and now i have a big stick guide now there is something else i can worry about. Having a pixie cut. My hair is now straight, not curly like wavy, i guess - and it's damn it's weird. You know so um. I was like really upset that first three days and i was like crying and i'm gon na lose my hair. My hair was like wasteland or something like above that it was really. It was actually falling off because of stress and bad nutrition, and so, but i was like planning to take good care of it and i could try to make the hair fall, stop stop and become better, but me with my impulsive decisions. I just woke up and said: let's cut the braids off. I do believe that everything everything happens for a reason and that um, maybe this happened for something that i don't yet get or understand. So i want to take this chance to take care like take good care of my hair and um like test. My confidence work on my inner confidence and i don't want to feel that my hair defined me in any way, and i don't want to feel that i i'm ugly, i'm not ugly, i'm the same person. I have the same face. It'S just like hair and hair grows um, so i'm just gon na take it as a test, a challenge to take care of my hair, my new hair, and to take care of myself and my confidence and feel that unapologetically myself, even though i don't have i Lost like inches of my hair um, i'm gon na talk positive to myself. I'M gon na talk good to my hair myself and yes, i cried like for a week and i felt very weird and when i went out, i felt very insecure and very anxious because, where i live, pixie cut is not a thing i was like weird. Everybody was staring at me so in not a good way, but i was like what why so, anyway, um i'm just gon na, take it as a chance to change and be the person. I'Ve always wanted to be confident, even though i don't i lost inches, but i gained confidence. You know and i'm really excited like i'm in a different person. You know i feel different and i want to take it as a chance to change and and challenge my confidence. It'S another step of healing, and i think if i took it that way, i will make the best out of it and it's fun. You know every few months i'll have a different length and try to work with it and i'm here, because if you did the same thing and you feel that you've had like a breakdown, you buzzed your hair, you cut your hair or you had like a haircut That you regret that it's a test, it's a challenge and you only live once like you, ain't gon na feel great amazing trust me so i'm here for anybody who feels alone. They had a pixie cut or a short haircut that they regret and we're gon na work it out together. You know we're gon na work at that hair, we're beautiful, you are beautiful and like challenge those beliefs you have inside of your self, you are beautiful. So here was after i cut one of the braids and i felt very very, very bad about myself, but there is no going back, so i took the scissors and get your scissors and cut the second right off. That'S after the second braid. Obviously the back was very uneven and very up like it was miserable. I looked i i looked like. I had something going on there now that was after i chopped my hair and then took a shower and let it dry it was very uneven. So that was actually before the salon and yeah. You can see that it was damn weird damn weird man today, i'm fearless today i chose fearless today i chose power. Today i chose potential. I'M gon na be everything i wan na, be i'm gon na, be beautiful. Gon na be attractive, i'm gon na be super fit a yoga instructor kind of fit. I'M gon na be very smart. I'M gon na be very such a badass, and i'm just gon na be the virgin of myself. I'M gon na be a singer. A musician, i'm gon na have money, i'm gon na get famous and viral, and i'm gon na talk rank top student. Nothing ain't gon na! Stop me this because she's, a rock star