Srsly: Can We Be Honest Abt H&M Hairstyle On 4C Black Girl? @Tonyatko Reports
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Over the past 10 years, Tonya TKO has helped Thousands of people Fall In Love! With over 300 Thousand followers and 90 Million Video Views, this viral Vlogger & Blogger unlocks the key to Self Love helping men and women find meaningful and fulfilling relationships. Profiled by The Huffington Post and with guest appearances on "Doctor Oz" and "Bethanny," Tonya TKO is unleashing her latest love revelations to the world in her second book, the "6 Step Shift to Self Love." Published by Balboa Press, (a division of Hay House) this powerful and easy to read guide is available for Pre-sale in September with hard copies on shelves June 2019.
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I worked as a graphic designer for many years, catalog and my whole entire job. The whole day long was to airbrush people's hair to being even on both sides - hello, knockouts, Tania TKO here and today we're going to be talking about this young black model and what I'm calling quote-unquote coil gate and what's going on with H & M, where the Model appeared in several images, with her hair done in a way that raised many black eyebrows, and I'm gon na show you some videos, some pictures and some memes, which will open up your eyes so go ahead and share this video go grab your popcorn make sure That you're subscribed and let's jump right into it. As you know, I'm Tanya TKO and I myself love specialist from Tanya TKO calm. I hope you learn how to love yourself and one another on this channel. We use viral topics as teachable moments in our own lives, and I've been a little reluctant to talk about this, because here is such a touchy topic in the black community and I've. Seen that other bloggers have taken a stand, saying that anyone who has issues with what happened or what's being shown in this picture is a text restorer hates for see here or even hates themselves, or even our colorist and I've even seen go on to talk about How anybody who criticized what's happening in this picture was quote-unquote dragging the black girl. Meanwhile, I think it's an important conversation to have. I think this, I think not having the conversation, is a missed opportunity to enact necessary change in an industry where black women need this change to take place. So I think it's important for us to talk about it. This is why I'm talking about it and if there's anyone who wants to fight me, that is fine, go ahead and put your comments below, because I'm going to gear myself up for the fight, because I think that we're being disingenuous, if we're gon na sit here And say that that the issue that we're having with these black girls here is that she has four see here. There are many. We had a hair revolution a few years ago and many many many beautiful hairstyles made with the 4c hair, but I think, what's going on, is that there are many of us who one don't know how to do 4c. Hair three are a little uncomfortable with were see here and three try to measure four see here against three C, two C, one C etc, and that's what I've been seeing in the conversations people are like. Oh this, young lady's hair is just in a messy ponytail. Like the other young, ladies who, who were in the advertisement, let's put the brakes on right there, first of all, negroid hair does not go into a ponytail. Negroid here goes into a puff and if we look at what it is that we're seeing right here, this young lady has a struggle puff going on her here is not brushed and it's see the thing is that it's not we don't have an issues. You know what let me read this for you, Jamaicans Sonia said the black child's here in the H & M photo needed proper care. The problem is not the fact that the child has 40 here. The problem is that these white / non black hair stylists deliberately aren't wanting to deal with the complexities of how to treat type 4 hair, and someone responded to her crazy life. Simple style says I used to model and always came with my hair done. I didn't think too much about it, then other than I was obviously doubtful that there would be anybody to do my quote-unquote difficult here. I wanted to look good in front of the camera, just like everybody else, so I came with my hair done, didn't think twice in hindsight now I realized that that's an issue and you see, I think, while we are absolving the stylist behind the scenes of really Having to do their job, I think that we are that we're doing a disservice to black girls everywhere black women. So I want you to take a look at this video and I want you to pay close attention to the models here before this quote-unquote makeover. All we're gon na do is really really get all that hair and we want to kind of try to focus it to one side of the head like a side, yeah you're talking about exactly so like the 90s are back. It'S all about, like rocking the pony. Aside, the more to the side, it is the better and the other thing that's really in right now is bang. So what we're gon na do is sort of undo these curls that she has in front of her face yeah and like really kind of create this, like bang in front of it. Okay, I really play with the textures of her hair. It'S beautiful and kind of embrace it and it's all about effortless looking. So if you kind of just let these go yeah - and you want this also, you want to be high on the head, though right, okay as possible, okay and get it off your neck. So it's like you know when you're, sweating and stuff yeah, oh nice and hot super cute right be gorgeous. I know Lilly yeah and you see what I'm saying so tell me: did her hair look better before or after this stylist decided that she was going to give her the quick summer updo and bangs, and this is exactly what I'm talking about. This is what happens behind the scenes on these gigs. You have Caucasian stylists or just non black stylist, who just don't understand black girl, magic and the fact that our here defies gravity. And then you have the production coordinators in all of their Caucasus. Arrogance. Who don't understand that our skin and our hair needs specialized specialist who specializes in our tone and textures, I'm letting you know as a person who works behind the scenes that I can't tell you the amount of angst that I feel when somebody on the production crew Is like oh you've got to go to hair and makeup. In fact, I just finished working on set of this black movie and I felt that same the pangs on the inside when they're like. Oh, you got ta go to here and makeup and when I went to the hair and makeup trailer, there were sisters in there deal with. There were black women who were running the hair and makeup trailer. And that's because this was a black film and I've sat down in man. I told her. I wanted a smokey eye and homegirl beat my face. She was talking about contouring. She got my lashes on right. She smoked up the eye, it wasn't as smokiest. I typically like it no with the dark dark smoke. You know when this smoke this fire. It wasn't that dark, but she did it nice. For the movie said it was a. It was a welcome changed in being on some of these larger productions where there are Caucasian people in there, and they just don't know what it is that they're doing - and you know it's like you - get paired up with someone who's well-meaning but they're, either ill-equipped ignorant Or even hostile about styling you and then you in an after. When all is said and done, you come out looking a mess. I remember my very first time when I went to go get headshots. I realized that there was a difference when I went to get headshots the first time and the woman was Caucasian. She went and she put this brown makeup all over my face, hiding all of the natural tones speaking of tones, I have yellow undertone. She covered my face and red under to red pigmented makeup and it was just a mess I ended up. Looking I didn't even look like myself. I nedd never ended up using the pictures and then she had these bushy eyebrows on my face and the photographer and his arrogance was like he, they just wasn't really trying to hear what it is that I was saying I went ahead and I I went. I continued with the shoot because it was too late at that point, but I never ended up paying for pictures. I only paid for the proofs and then after I saw them, and I saw that I didn't look like myself. I was just like. I shrugged my shoulders to it and I kept moving in the wind, and I know that it makes a difference having black stylists having black riders in the room, makes it different having black stylists in the room makes a difference. All of these things make a difference, and in this case with this young lady, I think we're missing an opportunity to really hold hmm to task cause. Like I said, black people don't have ponytails. We have puffs. This young lady has a little struggle puff on top of her head. There are there hears that are that are sticking out on the sides, and I can imagine that there was some Caucasian person who was director of this shoot. Who was like, oh and hmm, came out and said that they liked the kids to be kids, that they come in from after school. Looking like you know, like date like they have played all day, and I'm like come on now with all the hairstyles that, with all of the beautiful little brown girl hairstyles, that we have out there with the baubles and the bow bows and all this other stuff. What and you know what the thing about it is there's some hair that needs more maintenance than other people's hair. Our here needs a different type of maintenance and that's okay, there's nothing wrong with that. You know it's like I heard people saying, oh because these Caucasian girls have their hair up and they have the little flyaways hanging down. I'M sorry, hair texture does matter, it's like when I say it matters. It'S like, like anything matters like the way that you treat fleas and the way that you treat satin or silk or or denim, is going to be different. You know, fleas can can attract pills on it. You know where it becomes lint, etc. When you're dealing with African hair remember, Annie great here, remember we have a coil pattern that coils oval e. So the issue isn't that she has four see here. The issue is that her hair needs a different type of maintenance and that that matters, because for those of us who have Caucasian friends or mixed family members etc, we know that Caucasian hair is not always wispy, it gets tangled, it gets matted anybody who has you Know we talk about all the superiority of the of the big curls etc in the natural movement, but those of us who have mixed mixed children and our family, whose mothers are non black and they're like? Oh, I don't know what to do it or even though there's so many of us that'll be like oh. I wish I had the big curls, but then these women are like. I don't know what to do. I actually saw one young lady who had locks inside of her here, because her mother just didn't know how to brush it. She was Japanese and she was just so just so far removed and so frustrated, even though all she needed was some pink oil moisturizer and their little girls and everything would have been a ok, but for her it was a lot to manage and a lot to Handle and you'd be surprised at what it is that you see going on behind the scenes on some of these sets. You know not only that, like some of it is deliberate like if you look at these fashion shows and what some of the black models are wearing compared to what some of the white models are wearing. There is racism, there's racial insensitivity and there's also racial intolerance. In many industries, and and especially in an industry where the European standard is the standard of beauty and so they're selling a certain aesthetic, and so those who are closest to the European features, get treated a certain way and those furthest from it get treated a certain Way to get dressed in different types of ways like this little girl, like every all of us, know that when your hair is short because, like this little girl, she was posed in other pictures, where her hair was in a cute TWA, which is a teeny weeny. Afro, for those of you don't know and she's looking gorgeous she's looking happy she's looking wonderful. What I can imagine happen is that some white stylists decided that they were gon na put her hair up in a ponytail and black people don't have ponytails, I'm telling you we have puffs right, and so we who have pops. You know that when you have a struggle puff going on that you get yourself a piece of stocking and when you're pulling it around, you stop right at the at the point where your puff is the size that you want it to be, you don't pull it All the way back until you have this scrawny little rabbit tail going on back there. You know what I'm saying and then listen on top of all of that there were a lot of people who had to approve this picture before this picture got got sent to press a lot of people approved this, and I'm telling you from a person who worked Behind the scenes I worked as a graphic designer for many years. I worked, and I had like this gig at this catalog and my whole entire job. The whole day long was to airbrush people's hair to being even on both sides airbrush people's clothing to having no wrinkles and all of this stuff. There were people who could have your airbrushed fist into a round. Puf there were people who could have you don't mean, and I think I think that when we observe hmmm of the culpability, when we say things like, oh the other little girls had messy buns. So she had a messy bun. No there's a difference. You know, because you didn't see any little girls up there with matted hair with hair, looking crazy with hair flyaway all over the place, like some Caucasian girls can have you didn't you? We didn't see that, but this little girl here instead there was nobody on that set to advocate for her and to be able to get her the assistance that she needs, and I think that we need to stop putting the culpability on us and we really need To hold H & M responsible, you know last year when they had that coolest monkey in the jungle, a sweatshirt debacle. You know I had. I had my own issues with that last year, but it wasn't until I saw these images this year that I decided that nah hmm has a real problem with diversity and inclusion and representation behind the scene, because this right here it's it's, not a good look. It'S not a good look. We can't sit here and say that here doesn't matter that hairstyle doesn't matter that kept nizam at ER, like if you look at this guy before and after deep. He is saying that these are the same people and you know how women have our our makeup and you can't trust it, but look at this man and how crew mning made all the difference in the world for him. He said that the world barber said that the man went from looking like he, he smoked crack to looking like he's. Looking like he sell it, and all he did was get a shape up, trim his beard and get a fade. You notice saying hairstyles matter, they matter and this person says hmm add I love it and I wish I saw images of me a beautiful little girl being a beautiful little girl when I was her age. I understand your criticism, but beneath that criticism, is there a knee-jerk reaction to reject natural black baby years? Her here in the state it was photographed, is beautiful. I'Ve been natural way before it was cool and your criticism cuts deeply. Our beauty, and by our I mean mean women, girls and black females is not dependent on expensive products and glam squads we're beautiful because we are and yes I know this is a million dollar campaign ad, but it's also an impactful statement about true beauty. I hope you can see that too, and I hope people can see that we don't have issues with her quote unquote, baby years, because the hairs that are not pulled into the butter not baby hairs. We all we know what baby hairs are. The little fine hairs that grow out in the front. Did you take a little toothbrush and some gel, and and and do your little Superman, curls and all that other stuff on it? We know a baby, here's our. This is not an issue of baby hairs or expensive products, because when you look through when you look through the catalogues of the ancestors, do you see the ancestors with struggle buttons on their head? Do you see them with their hair? Look in any kind of way, I'm saying there are many beautiful styles that we as black women look. We are innovators when it comes to style. Yet here we have this young black girl and we can't really talk about the truth of what's going on here and then miss this opportunity for somebody with some black sense to be there on the door go on photo shoot to be like now, not on my Man, let me bring this young lady hair with a little boy's head brush or whatever it is they're using behind the scene, a little boys, bristle brush and just brush it up just a little bit expensive. All you need is some some spray bottle of water. Oh your little sister and then the brush up and get your little hose and pull it back up into a little puff, and all is good if you want to get some gel on the baby. Here is that's a whole other extra step, but at least let's get her here groom because, like I said with 4c coyly here, it will coil around one another. Does that mean that? Because a Caucasian here who has straight here's not going to coil around itself that we're just going to leave black hair coiled in in in in patterns that are separating from itself on the side and just be like? Oh yes, oh this is this yeah. If she's coming home from school and all this other stuff, that's one thing, but what black mothers gon na send her child out to a photo shoot like this. For real, though for real Vernon Francis says it's essential that we have a conversation about this photograph. From hmm Kids Campaign - and then he goes on about how he doesn't really know, what's going behind the scenes - and he says this beautiful young girls, kinky hair appears to have very little to no attention. Yet all her counterparts have clearly sat in front of someone who was more than capable of styling other hair textures. My heart breaks imagining yet another girl from my community sitting in front of a mirror being ignored by the team around her left to our own devices, because someone didn't know how to handle her texture and, if that's not bad enough prior to prior to this campaign. Appearing this photograph will have been seen and approved by countless protocol professionals - let's say conservatively 50 people. It'S breathtaking to me that not one person looked at this shot and had the same reaction that the internet seems to be feeling since the campaign broke. That is an issue. We must do better our girls, our young women, deserve better. Let this be a moment of learning. Education is key hashtag. We have to do better and then he goes on to black girl, magic and other hashtags. That was Vernon Francois and I'm glad that he said it. It'S like people who work in the industry know that this is something deliberate, that there are a lot of people who had to approve not only her look her hear her style, but then also to approve it from pre-production production and post-production. I'M telling you i sat in a room with other graphic artists who work for catalogue and all we did all day was making sure that people's hair was right, that the clothes were right. No wrinkles that left side of the body was symmetrical to the right side. That the hair that the arms, that all of that, that that's what we did all day long, we were paid to do that, and so - and I mean, if you look at this picture right here, it's even more telling that this girl was neglected. This is not and when I say that she has a struggle bond and all of that this is a beautiful young lady, as you see she's, killing it and she's she's fierce she got that black girl magic going on, and I love what it is that she's Doing what I'm talking about is holding hmm and other companies like this culpable and holding them responsible for having a multicultural team to be able to handle people of different cultures behind the scenes and they're people who feel like we're, dragging and criticizing. The girl like. She can't help. No, this is a child. She is not responsible for how she looked on that set the stylist they here, people to hair and makeup the graphic artist afterwards, the people who directed this shoot and the production people who coordinated afterwards, they are responsible, they're responsible for not having somebody on on deck. To be able to to take care of her here to make sure that she was representing her most groomed self to make her look like the same way that she would look if her mother were taking her out over the way her mother would send her out And my heart breaks that there was nobody advocating for this child on the set and some people compare this to the Gabby Douglas situation, where Gabby's here was looking in between whatever it was in between. When I mean that's a that's a young lady who is grown enough to do her own here, she's an athlete working and doing her thing on the on the ground, that's a whole different story of why people reacted that way to that young lady's here, and I Don'T get that personally in this situation, this is a whole other story, we're talking about teams of people whose sole job is to make sure that this shoot goes the way the the director of the shoe wants it to go, and so that's my whole entire comment. Right there, I want to hear your thoughts below. I want to hear what it is that you have to say, because I feel like we're not really speaking up in having the tough conversation about the fact that the girls here was not groomed and that there were a lot of people who approved it. Looking this way, you know not note, I will see you all in the next video make sure that you come over to my website. Tania TKO comm, where you can order your affirmation journal your self-love affirmations, workbook and rewrite your subconscious programming for self love. You can also join the mailing list and get a free copy of the relax mp3, and I will see you in the next video. I want to hear all of your thoughts below yay and a look if you want to fight I'm willing to fight for this. If you agree, I'm willing to give you high fives in the comments, because I agree too, if you disagree, please state why and let's go on for mere Tonia TKO and I'm out peace go go out there and love one another but most importantly, love yourself and Part of loving yourself is acknowledging when something is awry.
Comments
Yes to Living Well!: It all boils down to stop buying H& M . you can't even see how beautiful her cheekbones are for worrying about the broken edges.
TXejas19 TXejas19: I think she's fine the way she is. I agree that maintenance matters and neglect may very well have been the situation but i love her fuzz and all❤
M G.: I think two things can be true at the same time. I understand the concern around “the care” and health of the young girls hair, but let’s just be honest the black community does not value 4c hair. The hair texture hierarchy is real and the standard for “acceptable” 4c hair is a lot higher than for other hair types. Girls with 4c hair are expected to have their edges laid at all times, their hair greased up for “shine”, and situated in “flattering” styles that require high levels of manipulation and maintenance. Little white and mixed girls walk around all day everyday with carefree ponytails and fly always and are seen as adorable. Little black girls either have to have a million ponytails with heavy beads, painful braids, or hair extensions. Why do we only accept 4c hair when it’s super long and super thick? Most adults of all stripes don’t have super long or thick hair. But it seems to take that for 4c hair to get any love in the black community.
Chronicle Speaks: I have 3 daughters and 2 of which have 4c hair and yes this girls hair is severely damaged. My problem was never the texture, her hair is already broken and did not need to be in anyone’s ponytail. You did one of the best jobs in explaining this sis.
Angela J.: Honestly Tonya, it can go either way. I have 3c hair & I have only had 2 stylists to style my natural hair properly. Case in point, curly hair needs to be cut wet. Most black stylist always wants to cut my hair blown dried. It always comes out uneven. So it takes a highly skilled stylist to deal regardless of race to manage many hair types. However I get it though, the styling team needs to be more diverse to take up the slack from those who aren’t versed in various hair types.
Morshe Fae: Her 4c hair is NOT HEALTHY 4C hair. That was MY ISSUE. And don't @me cause I'm a dark skinned woman with 4c hair. Her hair is broken off
Saltnpeppanatural: I’m all for natural hair. Her hair doesn’t look healthy and it’s dry.
WoahhItsMonica: When I first saw it I’m not going to lie, I felt a way. It looked damaged and dry. But upon seeing her other picture with her TWA I realized her hair is just short and someone shoved it into that bun. Her hair is clearly too short for that bun and it’s just unflattering. There’s nothing wrong with her hair, it’s the style. Her hair makes more sense with the theme but that doesn’t change that they should’ve left it in a fro unless she showed up with this bun.
Ellie Dee: Exactly, thank you! It was never about not loving our 4c hair. You can't compare black hair to white hair.
Kashmere C.: Your breakdown was the best I’ve heard concerning this!! One vlogger said most of us had our hair like this when we were younger. Well I must be honest, my mom never had my hair like this. My hair was always well maintained ... etc. So I wasn’t in agreement with what the vlogger said. I would never speak against this beautiful little girl. But unfortunately her hair was not well kept or done. As you said ... there are MANY hairstyles for this type of hair.
Corette Jones: I’m sure there was a hair brush and spritz on set Baby could be my twin as a child, lol! I grew up rough and tumble with brothers, so when my parents picked us up on the fly, after school or playground or swimming pool etc, they had stuff in the car(comb, brush, lotion, vasilene, washcloth) to spruce us up a bit for a pop up visit to grandma or a restaurant or site-seeing, cookout etc. I grew up in the 60’s Black America what we now call “4-c” was the norm for girls and boys in My community. SAY IT LOUD I’M BLACK AND I’M PROUD- James Brown! My parents and their peers use to BLAST it at the Cookout❤️
lbrown1192: Idk why some of us blacks are so gullible. I'm not surprised w this. A year or couple years ago a black boy was not represented properly. I will never let my child be in a hm commerical.
May: As someone with a bi-racial daughter with type 3 hair, I still wouldn’t let her go out the house without doing something to her hair even though people think her texture is social acceptable. I put a lot of value in how my children present to the world because they are a reflection of me. I need to at least put in some leave in conditioner and water
Keetah hudson: Not done correctly at all. I am 44 yeas of age, my hair journey is real. Moisturizing my hair every other day. I had to teach myself through books and facebook. Thanks so much.
GlowBeautyWellness: I think that ppl that have never been on set don’t understand that they usually have hair stylists and makeup. And I can imagine this company had hair on set. I feel that this was def on purpose. The Afro was a much better look. A twist out I think would have been cute too. I’m convinced some ppl choose to fight all the time about things that are obvious....to fight the power ✊ It’s not hard to comprehend that having 4C hair is not the problem and there is a difference between this little girls hair and the other girls. Maintenance for texture is real. And we all know what a struggle ponytail is!! Selective outrage is real ♀️
Que B: I totally agree , when I posted it I got blasted for not appreciating my blackness and this clearly isn’t the issue ... the lack of respect for this child’s hair is the issue .... this got me upset and H&M needs to do better how much more times will they disrespect our community it’s beginning to look like an agenda for this company and it’s been going on long before the the “monkey issue”
Charis W.: Exactly. This is the fashion industry. We need to be represented better, they should have let her hair out, forget the hair tie. They should have moisturized her hair. Why do they leave us looking like we rolled out of bed? We aren’t supposed to look like anybody, we’re supposed to be eye catching. The girl is beautiful but they totally neglected to do her hair. And can I add, why is she wearing boyish clothes? ♀️ they really don’t want us outshining them.
Alona James: You are always so articulate and get your point across. Such a breath of fresh air.
Zatana 1878: Ppl r exposing the fact that they don’t know what HEALTHY 4C hair looks like & r accusing ppl who do of self hate. They have a lot of nerve ♀️
Al Kahinat: I’m glad you broached this topic Firstly the brand is suspect Secondly the child had far better photos with her small fro and they looked lovely I’ve been keeping quiet because of the shaming gang but recognise that people who say we sometimes embrace everything black in an attempt to offset white supremacy by overcompensating were right I never see little black girls with their hair forced into ponytails like that one and it’s pulling her edges So those riding for this need to understand the source and make judgments accordingly Another example of how inclusion hinders us
DayZStar: Omggg that TV segment had me vexed! And cracking up cuz sis was really professional holding her composer cause she didnt even ask was it hurting her at all while roughly tugging her hair wow wtf and made it look fuked up. im tooo "tenda" headed i woulda flipped
TashBabi16: Very valid points, Tonya
Bibi Mocoby-Popoola: I beg to differ with you Tonya. These guys were following a theme. I saw tweets of how black little girls looked in the morning Vs when they got back from school, I'm even tempted to say they copied their theme from those tweets. If the hair was combed and brushed like you say it would have defied the theme ♀
Delayna Semaj: thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you... I had a full discussion / argument on Facebook about this topic people just don't understand that it's not about her hair texture or length.. it's about the damage and also that they did absolutely nothing to it! Thank you for pointing out my point of view!
nkreseknowledge: This blew all the way up because of triggered black women with 4C hair. They all chimed in how we're all hair shaming a child, it's sickening!! The little girl's hair looks dry and broke off!! And people spoke up about it because they care. I have 4Z hair and when I was little every Sunday evening me and my sisters would get our hair done for the week. Pink lotion, a cup of water, hair grease and some bobos and we were good. These days black women just want to have something to be victimized about and argue with the people who actually agree and advocate for them. Many need therapy out here.....♀️
Inanna Venus: They could've cleaned it up and photoshopped it like they do for everyone. Beautiful little girl but there is always makeup and hair on set for a photoshoot. They did her wrong.
Deanne Copeland: As a community I think we have an unhealthy obsession with long 'healthy looking' hair. Why does our hair always have to be slicked back and laid. The girl has messy broken hair but there's nothing wrong with that. Can we just let children be children and stop obessesing about their appearance. Every little girl with 4c hair looks something like that before they manipulate it. We need to embrace all textures and get rid of the notion that 4c hair is only acceptable when styled.
Mys Teaq: Tonya TKO, I can always count on you to eloquently say what’s on my heart and mind. I talked to my Ema about it, she’s 73, when I showed her the picture I said “keep in mind the aesthetic they were going for was after school/after recess Naturalness.” She has been in education for over 20 years mind you. She said “this ain’t that. I’ve seen many a Chile’s after school days and that’s not the issue. The issue is that whoever is in charge of this beautiful babies hair either doesn’t know what/how to do it, or just gave up on the job.” The babies hair is damaged, extremely dry and breaking. That’s the issue.” Am I petty and superficial for noticing? That’s debatable. But to say this is what 4C hair looks like in its natural state... no. This is what 4C hair looks like when you don’t maintain a moisture regimen and it begins to break off. Not judging the mother because from my perspective, giving her the benefit of doubt, she may not know what/how to do her hair in order to keep it healthy. She may not be familiar with our culture and know how much importance we place on looking what we consider appropriate, and why that is so important to us. And it just may not be a priority for her to maintain her hair so that it doesn’t appear dry and damaged. But I have to say any black person that would allow their child to model for H&M in 2019 makes me wonder about their mindset and background.
Sofondra: Tonya, I agree. This is a clear example of the industries insensitivity of how Black people are represented.. .
earthangel: This is the best explanation I've heard on YouTube about this!!!
SupaAmi: THANK YOU FOR THIS. the hair looks dry, damaged and unkempt and her edges are thinned out. It’s not about not liking 4c hair. I love 4c hair and constantly share and promote 4c hair on my pages. However this isn’t about not liking kinky hair. Yes, all the other kids in the photo shoots had messy, laidback hair styles, BUT their hair looked mostly healthy and not dry and damaged.
HazelGreen19: Side Note: Happy Daughter Day to all of you! ✌️
Marie Small: You know the funny part is your parent would do your hair for picture day and you'd come home and the bun is out, the clips are gone, style different than that your mama sent you out with!!! Your mama sees you and starts breaking!!! My mother would have been flipping the fleek out"I know your hair better not look like that in your pictures!! I have NEVER shopped at H&M but the ninjas will continue to go!! Smh!! I'll pull out my sewing machine and a Mcalls pattern before giving these folks a dime!!!
NO TO THE SUNKEN PLACE: Blame the parents for sending her out like that and allowing her to be photographed like that.
Love Bug: I started modeling as a teenager. First for department stores and then runway and print. During this time I transitioned from permed to natural hair. The under representation of stylists and makeup artists who understood our skin and hair was just as much an issue 20 years ago as it is today. I would arrive at sets with my hair already done because my mother didn't play about our hair. I could get away with no foundation due to having clear skin. And yes, ALL advertising photos cleared a multitude of desks before being printed. Sometimes a WHOLE shoot would be scrapped and re-shot because the vision was not coming through in the photos. H&M KNEW damn well what they were doing. Unfortunately, like with the popeye's situation, Black America has given them millions in free press. Trust and believe, someone is tracking all these videos and contrasting them to sales $. Also, while she is beautiful, that young ladies hair is not healthy. Input in=input out. Especially for AA women and girls, water and vegetables are vital to our hair and skin growth and retention. Knowing your hair type, density, and porosity are key to choosing products that are BEST for YOUR hair. This requires research. Our cells turn over every 28 days or so. Every 11 months our bodies go through a bit of a metamorphosis. As we age collagen, elastin, and keratin production slow down. Traction alopecia is a reality for far too many BW and it is preventable. We can no longer claim ignorance with the accessibility to quality information about health and hair care. This is not normal. Cognitive dissonance on those especially in the Black community who think it is. Similar to how growing up holes in your jeans was not fashionable nor a sign of being well kept. We represented our parents and them sending us out looking decent meant something.....
Princess Aleia jado'e: Hair is hair in all form. Black hair ,black people is beautiful no matter what and she is still beautiful tho.
Proverbs31 Teacher: Tonya your commentary on this was the best that I have heard. I believe that we as the black community repelled the picture of the little girl is due to our conditioning of not being outside of the house with your hair not done. We are protectors of our children, and we don't want anyone to be ridiculed. There are sad and hateful memes floating across the media that actually show black dark skinned women with short 4c hair in pony short pony tails on top of there heads. The quotes that follow these memes are all hateful. We need to see more 4 abc black women wearing their hair without the slick down jelled up approach, and show the world our beautiful natural hair.
Rae: Wow you made some great points.
Sha Amilli: Did someone really just photoshop this little girl's hair to prove a point???? First of all, none of us know that little girl, none of us do her hair constantly on a daily basis to actually assess her true texture, and also most of all, SHE IS A CHILD! Most 4c-z children have hair like this in its natural state and no amount of brushing will help or even be healthy for it!! MOST of all STOP comparing her to the other white children! THE TEXTURE IS NOT THE SAME and she will always look different! All blacks don't have the same texture or hair care requirements! If ya'll hate looking at 4c-z hair so much then you need to take a look at yourselves! Stop pushing your negative thoughts onto a CHILD you've never even met in your lives as well as her parents! Some SORRY folks I tell ya!
Nat Morgan: I love the natural look. Her hair is beautiful.
Brown Eyes Black Dragon: Thank you for speaking on this
BeStephanie Bewitched not bothered: Loved your video and as usual TonyaTKO you nailed it!
Laurell McCann: You can tell they didnt even comb her hair before putting it in the puff. Look at the cone..going into the puff... That cone..means the hair under the top layer had not been throughly combed out .. It's the same cone the lady had on the tv show..where the stylist just swept up the edges and threw it in the holder.. Tasha is right.. This isnt a case of "we want kids to look like they were playing outside" It's not a case of her having a "messy bun" ..even a messy bun on 4c hair..has a firm base.
Cass andra: @Tonya tko. THANK YOU 4 BEING HONEST. I worked 4 a photoshop company that photographs 4 childrens school pics k-12th grade and prom photos. WE BRUSH/PHOTOSHOP EVERY SINGLE PHOTO! There r requests forms parents can fill out, if they would like, 4example, teeth whitening on the child, acne removed etc. We also air brushed hair by filling in spaces, removing dust, and lint in the hair, free of charge, and with no parental consent needed.
AdorzAaliyahSince94: I've never, ever shopped at H&M and if I did, last year's shenanigans would have done it for me! They only seem to care about causing some viral controversy just to get attention! Sadly, our image/imagery as Black people seems to keep being the victim of collateral damage. She's a cute little girl and she didn't deserve this treatment by them. I'm even willing to bet that someone may have attempted to fix it and they were prevented from doing so, with some tired excuse. Either way, this was deliberately done! Let's be real, they honestly don't care to understand our hair, they never have! If they ever did, things like this would've been handled better eons ago! People may not remember, but Judge Mablean (Divorce Court) was replaced over a hairstylist conflict on the set. As a people, we were raised to always put our best foot forward, to never leave the house looking a mess and to look like a million bucks, even if we didn't have a dime to our name! That's why we get bent out of shape when one of our own is unkempt.
Beauty Diore: First off, forget HnM. Why does it look like the mother doesn't even know how to take care of the little girls hair? It doesn't look taken care of. I Love, Love, Love our hair.
Ms ch: Tonya! Expose the truth. Thank you. 4:28-5:43, messed that lady's hair up. They don't want us to look beautiful. Excellent presentation. The kid's messy styles were neat compared to the truly messy styles you showed. A light brush to the sides or hands to sweep up the sides could have been done to her style. You are right, it has nothing to do with her hair type, they could have did better with the style. And yes she is beautiful!! Stay focused and honest people.
Love4MyPeoples: Tonya, why did you chop all that beautiful hair off? It had to be past bra length! OMG it was sooooooo beautiful and healthy… just thought I'd throw this in here But on this little ones hair, I believe it went exactly how H&M needed it to go! A day of playground and school, this is how their hair will look. I was a foster mom of ALL ethnicity and the way the girls hair looked was right on point, and I'm referring to ALL of them. I have two texture hair! The top is Nappy and easier for me to style. The rest of my hair is silky, which is MORE difficult to style! To ME, Nappier is Happier ✊
Chrissy BeTalking: Such great points!
Mitzy Pritzy: That pretty fro on her was soooo Beautiful and Divine!! That fro style was perfectly fitted.
Princess Aleia jado'e: They jealous of us without even knowing
Sewing and Crafts Channel: Where was her mother or father?
Alicia Cunningham: When I pick my son up from elementary school some of the blk girl's hair look just like this. Now a few of them even come to school like that and I SMH bcus I say to myself why didnt her parenta brush and moisturize that child's hair. So for some lil girls this tragedy is normal. I wud nvr, if I had a daughter, let her go anywhere like this! Maybe even this lil girl's parents didnt even care so the company is like well we dont care either. SMH!!
bridgettedenise: We always have our hair looking presentable. That looked uncombed.
Pineapple Sunkist: They purposely did ths... SMMFH! Not my child....
Princess Aleia jado'e: Beauty beyond hair people need to stop putting name on hair. Live people live period.
Daqueen of everything: I definitely looked better before ♀️
laydeemuff: That hairstylist doing the Black Woman's hair was a parody right! The mum should of combed her daughter's hair...furthermore her mother is ok with it!
Lauvon Fr: I'm conflicted, if her Mom was around or someone to brush, add a little moisturizer in between shootings and make it look not so dry some people would still complain. The theme was what your child looks like after school now, if it's natural hair and your child sweats you get that dry unkempt look. I think this little girl was adorable. Hopefully, all the criticism doesn't give her a complex. We get enough negativity about our hair, give our kids the ability to embrace their hair and not abuse it to feel accepted.
renrichmad1975: I was raised overseas, so I'm not like a lot of people who are obsessed with TV and the images they project. To me, she looks like any number of black girls, and myself coming home from school. What we as Black Women fail to realize is that one of the best perks of being a child is being allowed to be free and natural, to not have to be constantly checking our appearance because of societal pressures. Now we have the audacity to be critiquing this young lady because her hair is not "on fleek." This, red bottom shoes, designer purses, Jordan's, and just all the fads and crazes that Black Women throng to purchase and aspire to is just getting beyond embarrassing. You have officially told the world that it is okay to keep ridiculing your image, because you, like everyone else, despises it. Shameful and shameless at the same damn time.
Natasha’s Here: Her edges are broken. It looks sparse and thin around the nape and front. Texture isn’t the issue here. I rock wigs to mix it up but I have Sisterlocks. My daughter and I have 4g hair and our edges lay with a brush, water and moisturizer!!!!
KALEIDO jess: She could just let her hair out it would’ve looked way better I think -> They could’ve styled it freely without the ponytail and it would look better she is a kid so it should’ve been their job to help her out.
Finesse Fine: Why did they pull it into a ponytail? It is clearly way too short for that up style.
Daisy Flower: All I gotta say is that they could have let her hair out in a messy afro.
Kil Dem: Nope. #megafail.H&M should have known better ( but not surprised for this company is from Sweden and how many black (American or otherwise )resides in Sweden) They could afford a black hairstylist. Hell, even both of my daughters (11 and 13) have said this was very inappropriate when I showed this picture to them. The youngest saying she would not go out looking like this, and they don’t have “4c” type of hair . If a black girl KNOWS this is wrong, like my girls does , why doesn’t anyone else? (The latter was a rhetorical question.) Smmfh.
Natasha Tate: She beautiful, I looked the same after school
YB DAKID_: This is one of the reasons little girls who grow into adult women have body issues. For us to say her hair is not acceptable the way it is is detrimental. That little girl probably never thought one thing bad about her hair till her own people singled her out. The ones who feel her hair is a problem whether she be in the house or out in public need to really adjust their lenses and assess why the vitriol hate against her natural beauty is coursing through their veins.
HOBBY Mommy: I have natural dreadlocs down my back, but my edges look like hers unless I brush in edge control EVERYDAY before I leave out. I only feel the need to slick back my edges, & naps, & peas because of the negative looks that I get from other blacks if I don’t.
Pretty LIFE PrettyWife: And that stylist that messed over those pretty curls............
Brittany Reaves: I have a younger sister my mom has to fight with to keep her hair healthy looking She is a very active person She's always in sports, and kinda neglects her hair no matter how much my mom tried and gets her protective styles She'll have 2 week old braids looking like she's had em in for 3 months Some kids just don't take care of their hair REGARDLESS of parents trying and some black ppl have thin hair Not all of us have super thick and dense edges and hair I see so many excuses to say this girl's hair looks bad When there are alot of black girls who's hair looks like this on the daily basis
Aliyah Cathey: Those who are saying their main concern is the health of the child’s hair are such annoying hypocrites. Just be straight up. If the girl had a sew in or even just a fake ponytail added with the edges slicked y’all wouldn’t give a single f how healthy her hair is. It’s about the way it looks to you but you don’t wanna face that truth bc it says something about you that you don’t wanna believe is true.
Pineapple Sunkist: Im mad at th MOTHER.... i got two daughters nd stopped doin their hair as much. But its a wkly route we hv. I even include my sons in it... Ponytail, braids nd beads!
colorwayADDict: 100% agree.
m p: THAT WHITE WOMAN HAD THAT MODEL LOOKING LIKE SHE STUCK HER FINGER IN AN ELECTRICITY SOCKET!!!!!! SHE LOOKED A PICKLE. DONT TOUCH MY HAIR I GOT IT BECKY!!!!!
J C: I lived several years in Europe, what is in style there, is not the same as here. H&M is a Swedish company, perhaps they shouldn't have went with a messy bun in this case, but the clothing seems very casual, so I sort of get the idea that they want a line that works for all active kids. I don't think this girls hair looks bad, she looks like a active fun loving kid. I hope who ever this girl is, that this controversy has not reached her, because I would hate her to think something was wrong with her. I don''t have 4c hair, but I do have natural curl, and my girls have very curly hair, and go to a stylist that is black because she is the only one that has cut their hair for the curl. With curly hair, you can't just get up and it looks great, it takes extra work. I get that, but I see my grandaughter hiding her natural 4C hair with a wig and wonder what I can do to make her feel more comfortable with her beautiful natural hair, I want her to be able to celebrate herself, not try to hide her natural beauty.
V M: This is done on purpose.
VIP Analyst: That 4C shit has always irked me. How far down the food chain is that? What’s 1A hair? I bet if H&M created this grading system y’all be ready to burn down the building. BW cast spells without a single thought or consideration. 4C hair like wtf?
Jubilee: The entire theme of this shoot was kids with messy hair after school. All of the kids had messy hair but we expect the little black girl’s messy hair to be perfectly moisturized and styled...? How? Why? They literally went to the shoot right after playing all day and were untouched. We need to stop making such a big deal out of our hair that we’re going in on a child for how hers looks. It’s sad.
Issey Miyake: That summer updo was a hot summer mess. She fucked up he pretty hair
Holly Olsen: Looking like he smoke crack, to looking like he sells it! ???? That rubs me the wrong way. Smh
Mari Ba: I can’t believe what I’m hearing. I’m very disappointed with this video considering the fact that you always talk about self love. I know many many kids that looks like this little girl,And for once it’s good them to see something similar to what they look like. I can’t even finish watching this
Loletha1987:
Jodie Landon: That video was cringe! Sis had to smile through that mess
Leah star: #spraybottle #brush
Aliyah Cathey: Y’all think it looks bad bc that’s what y’all were taught is messy and unacceptable especially black women. I think the style looked very natural. I have 4C hair and many of my girl friends in school did too. Honestly, we all had our days looking like that. If the goal is supposedly looking like they came from recess they hit the nail on the head. Without styling and product many people with 4C look like that and it’s nothing to be ashamed of on it’s own. In context the style could have been better definitely. I disagree with the term ‘struggle puff’. Why can you only have a decent puff if it’s a certain size? We gotta stop that obsession with the length of our hair. Y’all never call out unhealthy, limp noodle, lackluster, oily Caucasian hair unless it’s matted bc y’all are fine as long as it is straight, long, and on a white head. I loved the pic. As a teacher it makes me smile and think about kids at school. Everything doesn’t have to be airbrushed and perfected and that’s for everyone across the board. Let’s start promoting and photographing more realistic looks vs idealistic.
NandiB.: Two words!!! Edge control!!!!!!!
Pretty LIFE PrettyWife: I’m no one combed the babies hair for the shoot. Ok bye.
Ⱡ₳Ⱡ₳ QɄɆɆ₦: What is 4c hair mean ?
Karen M: I hate when people say they are live... and it’s ‘pre-taped’!
Sharonda Lewis: Wait, that demonstration....wha?
IslandGirl: U can never win with blk women and d hair issue. If the little girl had relaxed hair it would be a big issue, if she had braids big issue, now she natural big issue, if they airbrush the spaces big issue. They should have filled the gaps that hair looks horrible messy, ..white models faces, hair body etc get airbrushed too steupz ...yall need to get a life! H&M should just not hire blk models save themselves the strife.
Roses & Peonies: I have 3a 3b hair but, i know that 4c hair should not look like this! They should have moisturized her hair and did a cute style with her hair down.
ISRAELITE JUDAH QUEEN: IT'S EXPLORATION PLAIN AND SIMPLE.
A Jones: I feel like in this situation people would have been upset no matter what they did. The girls hair is damaged beyond repair and the only solution probably would have been just picking someone with hair in a better position. If they had brushed up her hair too much people would have questioned why only the black girl had to had have her hair polished while the other didn’t.
Zikomo7: The photoshoot theme is regular after school kids. They’re happy. They learned about something. They played at recess. This is what kids look like after school. Stop it
lbrown1192: Gabby is not really different. There is some blacks that do not like\love their natural hair state
BreS: H & M didn’t style any of the children’s hair. They said this is the way the children’s hair looked when they came to the photo shoot after school. They all had messy hair.
Princess Aleia jado'e: Before
Bia7602: Really???? Struggle puff??????? The self loathing is reall with yall. Yall don't eleven know who the stylist is so wtf are you talking about???? Yall are just 2 obsessed with laid edges, sleeked hair and jelled hair pasted on yall head that yall simply REFUSE to see 4c hair as normal. Smh that's so disrespectful to that little girl. And that video with from years ago with the white girl styling the other girls hair has literally NOTHING to do with this HnM stuff. Smh
Eugenia Palacios: I'm sorry, I'm not black neither I live in the USA so I'm an outsider to your culture and struggles. But I have the need to speak up because you're talking about a child. And a lot of young girls who may feel represented on this model will listen to adults talking about how their hair is not good enough unless it's groomed. Here's my point: styling your hair should be a choice that makes it look more of your liking, but there's nothing to fix or hide to start with. I get you're complaining about non black hairdressers not bothering to learn how to style black hair and I can't argue that. But there's a difference between not giving hair proper care and ruining it (ex. matting) and just showing it as it is. You may like how it looks or not but it's just your opinion, beauty is subjective. Styling your hair is a choice, I don't think is fair to make it a duty for children. They deserve to spend minimum time on their hair if they want to, they deserve to flaunt it as it is without people thinking it's ugly just because it looks different. I do think I looks different, but I also know it's only my eyes not being used to that look. Me thinking that ponytail looks good or bad, it's just a point of view. I'm a latina woman and my hair was curly and long when I was a child. Because where I live people are a mix of natives and europeans, everyone had straight hair. I would've been very hurt and it would've been very wrong for adults if they asked my mom not to let my curly hair show, or to "fix" my flyaways (I looked like a dandelion in a ponytail). It's just wrong. Just let kids be.