The Time My Mother Told Me My Natural Hair Wasn’t Professional And To Get A Relaxer

I’ve been natural for almost 2 years now, and I feel like it was one of the best decisions I’ve ever made. I love the versatility and thickness of my natural hair. However, that hasn’t always been the case.

My mother has always been my biggest critic, especially when it comes to my hair. Basically, whatever she said went. It never really bothered me, until I decided to go natural.

For me going natural was me finally taking control over my hair and my body in general. For so long I’ve listened to others’ opinions about me and my body, so I figured why not do something for me, regardless of what anybody thinks.

I didn’t even text anyone before or immediately after I did the big chop. It took a while for it to sink it, so I really wanted to take the time embracing this new change.

A couple days later I sent a photo to my mother showing her my new chop, and she didn’t even respond. At first, that didn’t really shock me because she isn’t the promptest with texting back, so I called her later that night…. As soon as she answered the phone she started off with asking me what in the world did I do to my hair.

That’s where is started, and negative comments like that, concerning my natural hair were always a part of our conversations from then on.

It even got to the point where I called my mom to let her know about an interview I was invited to and I was questioning if I should wear my hair natural or get it blown out, and she told me to simply save time and energy and go ahead and get a relaxer.

She said that natural hair doesn’t look professional and because my mom’s opinion really matters to me, that comment in particular really hurt. Going natural was something that I did for myself, not for others and it was a declaration of hair independence. It was me saying that I loved every part of me in it’s natural state, especially my hair.

I ended up having a serious conversation with my mother about her comments, and thankfully since then she has toned down the natural hair jabs and has even given me compliments on my twist outs and wash n gos. We still have a very long way to go, but at least we are making progress!