My Boyfriend Told Me I’d Look Better Without My Locs

Starting locs was probably one of the best decisions I’ve ever made. It was prompted after a cross-country move, and just a time in my life where so much of my identity was wrapped up in what other people thought of me, which included my hair.

For as long as I could remember, my long hair was what people knew me for, and I grew to hate my hair, and everything it stood for.

I mean, granted it was beautiful, but it was just hair. So, needless to say it was liberating to sit in the stylists’ chair 3 years ago and let her chop off all of my hair, and start the loc process. I struggled a bit at first, because I had never seen myself with short hair, but I loved it! Now, my locs have grown exponentially and are at a cute shoulder length.

I met my boyfriend about 2.5 years ago at a friends wedding, and ever since then we have been inseparable. I love the fact that he met me in the early stage of the loc process, because it made me confident that he loved me for me, and not my long hair. However, the other night we were sitting inside having a game night, when out of nowhere he told me that he bet I’d look even better without dread locs.

I almost couldn’t believe my ears! I mean, I really thought that I misheard him, so I asked him to repeat what he said. He repeated it. I don’t know why his words cut me so deep, but they did. I know my boyfriend didn’t mean it to be malicious or rude, but it was deeper than that. That comment meant that he didn’t fully accept me for me.

I immediately started thinking, was he not proud to be seen with me? Before I knew it warm tears were coming down my cheeks. My boyfriend apologized immensely and said he didn’t mean it the way it sounded, but it was too late.

My boyfriend and I are still together, and deep down I know he loves me, but it still hurts to think that he might feel some type of way about my locs.