How Long You Have Been Natural Does Not Dictate How Much You Know

It’s almost thanksgiving and this year I plan to make my infamous delectable peach cobbler.

I never grew up eating cobbler nor did I see my mom or grandmother make it, I actually learned how to make it back in 2009 from an old recipe book I found and I have done it every year since then with the same recipe.

I mentioned it to my husband last week, you know, the usual sharing, I expressed how excited I was to make it, how he will love it this year and how I intend to make a huge one in comparison to last year’s dessert.

So you can imagine my surprise when he said ‘Honey* maybe we should skip the cobbler this year and try one that is store bought or even pecan”.

“Uh say what?”

“The kids and I were talking and sometimes, it seems as if your cobbler might be missing something” – *gasp*

They say practice makes perfect and you would think the more time you spent doing something somehow guaranteed that you would be an expert at that thing but that’s not always the case.

What if your expertise was wrong the entire time? What if how you did things needed changing and after a lifetime of practice the light bulb just went off?

I am here to tell you, it can and does happen. Accepting that I did not have the best cobbler was not easy, but after looking at other ways of making cobbler I realized I could have changed a few things to ‘improve the recipe’ and yield a better result.

The thing is just because you spend a lot of time doing something doesn’t automatically mean you are good at it and natural hair is not exception. Natural hair in all it’s complexities, different textures and behaviors is not something that anyone can claim to know in it’s entirety. I’m not ashamed to admit that I learn new things about it pretty regularly.

It is possible that one may know all there is to know about retaining maximum length but remain clueless about how best to define curls. Conversely one could know a great deal about braiding natural hair but know next to nothing about maintaining dreadlocks.

As usual social media, namely Facebook, where all raw emotions collide has brought to light a sector of long term naturals some whom have never had a relaxer expressing concerns that new naturals should not be taking advice from other considerably new naturals who blog and vlog and give advice about transitioning to natural hair, natural hair health and hair care.

In a way it makes complete sense right? You transitioned from your relaxer in 2008 but here is someone else who has had her natural hair her whole life. What makes you the go-to expert?

While there might some long term naturals who are fully capable of giving expert advice there are also some fairly new ones that can do a similar or even better job.

Hair care isn’t some kind of exclusive knowledge club that only certain members are a part of. Provided one is interested enough anyone can have the knowledge. You just need to have the desire to get it, use it and have some results to show for it.

Some bloggers and vloggers have chosen to dedicate a certain number of hours to studying natural hair, for many reasons; ranging from a traumatic experience with a relaxer or personal choice, to seeing it as a great business opportunity.

Whatever the reason for expertise is solely dependent on study, gaining knowledge, practice and results. Learning about your hair is truly your own right and your own responsibility.

The human body is so resilient that if you are breathing then your hair will still grow, retaining the length on the other hand is the problem for many ladies.

With that said even if you never had a relaxer there is no guarantee that your natural hair is healthy if you have no knowledge of how to take care of it. Being natural alone does not guarantee hair health.

If you are a new natural with the need for advice and guidance choosing the right person to seek advice from can be daunting and if you are not careful it can get frustrating.

The first thing you need to do is gain as much knowledge about your situation on your own. This might mean reading as much material as you can find from multiple sources as well as asking for second opinions after first ones.

The cool thing about hair care is that there is always more than one way to skin a cat so for instance what one person might tell you about her hair care regimen might not be the best thing for you, but parts if it might just be relevant and help you in some way.

If you are a long term natural but you have not captured your hair’s full potential, it is not too late to gain knowledge about what you need to do to get the most out of your natural hair.

Again the same rules apply, learning about how to care for your hair is your responsibility and quite frankly no one method is the best method so gaining as much knowledge as possible about your own personal situation is key.

Here on BHI we find it hard to separate hair care and hair health from science. The thing is, how your hair behaves is deep rooted in biological science so if you are hearing about hair care for the first time and there is no mention of a logical scientific base then something is clearly missing and you might want to keep looking at other sources.

On the other hand science alone cannot possibly tell you everything you need to know about your hair and the ins and outs of daily care.

Additionally, products do not create hair growth; we can’t tell you how many times we have heard ‘What product can I use to get my hair to grow’ the answer is nothing!

Products simple aid in length retention by keeping the hair strands intact and resilient to environment effects and your own manipulation. With that said, if you see an oil that boasts of causing growth, then take the claim with a pinch of salt. Your hair is growing anyway and the oil is unlikely to help you retain length if you don’t change you practices too.

The point I am trying to drive home is that how much you know is entirely dependent on how much time you spend on gaining that knowledge. You cannot become a subject matter expert on anything if you just sit and stare at it for years and years.

You have to figure out how it works to get results in order to be able to speak confidently on what it is that you know and have practiced.

Your own hair care is your responsibility and if someone has taken the necessary steps to seek out knowledge from what they think is a viable source then we have to support them rather than shoot them down for it.