Transitioning 101 - 10 Tips For Getting Out Of The Relaxer Mindset

2 years ago I explored this very topic but more specifically about how I felt about my first relaxer. The question then was ‘What was the mindset behind your first perm?’

The relaxer mindset is real ya’ll and it’s so strong that breaking away from it can prove to be very difficult for many of us. Some of us relaxed so many years ago that the idea of having relaxed hair is our ‘normal’ and having natural hair is actually a bit odd. We are not judging, it’s just how it is for some of us.

I like many others did not know a thing about the hair that naturally grew from my scalp, I had no clue how it behaved, how to take care of it, how to treat it or what products to use. I just knew that at 13 years old I could no longer exist with it and like a rite of passage for many other girls my age, I got a relaxer.

Now that you have decided to transition back to your natural texture, ridding yourself of the relaxer mindset just means opening yourself up to a new way of doing things, new products, final acceptance of all aspects of your natural hair and success in your natural hair journey.

We wanted to compile a list of 10 things you can do to get your mind right for your transition to natural hair, whether you big chop or decide to take a longer route to natural hair, these tips might just come in handy.

1. Product Purge

Do a product purge; you do not have to get rid of every product you own when you decide to move forward with your natural hair, as a matter of fact you might find yourself using a few of your old products later in your journey.

It is all about retail therapy, so pick a day when you need just a little me time, make a small list and get excited about purchasing some new stuff for those coily springy strands sprouting from your scalp.

2. Remove Temptation

Throw out any leftover relaxers to avoid unnecessary temptation. Put it this way you will need the space in your cabinets anyway, so just get rid of the old relaxers, you won’t be needing them any more.

3. Stay Inspired

Follow bloggers and you tubers that talk about natural hair for inspiration and a way to keep you engaged on your new journey. Sometimes it helps to surround yourself with everything that keeps you on track towards your goals.

4. Practice

Practice your healthy hair regimen weekly and styling in natural styles, because it makes no sense to transition to natural hair and not adopt healthy hair practices at the same time.

5. Be Nice

Practice being positive towards your hair, enjoy the stages that you are in by speaking in a positive manner every chance you get. Unfortunately, relaxing our hair for a long time can sometimes lead to negative feelings towards our natural hair, and breaking those mental blocks is a huge part of getting your mind right for the transition.

6. Know Ingredients Not Brands

Get ingredient savvy by reading as much as you can about what is in your products. Ingredients on beauty products is just as critical as the ingredients on the back of your favorite snack food.

When you learn about what makes your hair tick then your choices become less about brands and more about what that product actually has in it. Trust me, this is the best way to avoid the trap of product junkie-ism and find your staples quickly.

7. Pamper And Learn

See a master stylist just once for a thorough evaluation of your hair and for a little professional inspiration. Choosing a stylist is not easy, recommendations are normally the best route to take, but if you find a great salon that knows how to take care of natural hair it can help to give you that boost you need to carry on in your journey. There is nothing like knowing you have some professional support if things get a little haywire.

8. Get Creative

Start doing some things you would never do if you were relaxed, that might mean everything from regular scalp massages with exotic oils*, to DIY conditioner mixes. Figure out what you can do that is different from your typical relaxer regimen so that your mind will adjust to your new actions.

9. Party Like Its 1999

Attend natural hair mixers in your area so that you can interact with other women on a similar journey as your own. Natural hair parties and shows are not exclusive clubs, honestly they are just a lot of fun and the camaraderie is really helpful especially when you realize how many women just like you are out there.

10. Read Girl Read

Educate yourself about your hair in ways that have never done before by purchasing books dedicated to hair. For some reason we do not have the same sense of urgency to learn about our relaxed hair while relaxed, at least not all of us did.

In the spirit of doing something different purchasing scientific books dedicated to hair, and fun hair books will definitely keep your mind off that relaxer.