How To Create, And Keep Romance Alive

Welcome welcome back to the channel so today the video topic is going to discuss how to create and keep romance okay. So i know a lot of people are in long-term relationships or in short-term relationships or just still dating um, but it doesn't mean that you can't have romance the whole time whether your relationship is short lived long if you're married, if you're friends trying to get to That next level, there's always a way to create your level of romance for that situation and to keep it okay. So i've taken a few notes with my romantic pen: it's cute right now, right um, so number one! You can get your pins out too. If you want to write some of the stuff down but um, the first way that i suggest making your relationship romantic is make each moment together. Special. When i say special, i mean everything that you think about needs to have extra thought to it like what you're wearing um, where you're going, how you smell what you look like. You know how the weather is outside: try to create a very romantic ambiance um, whether it's with your smell, how you look, what your clothing feels like the fabric of your clothing, um like what perfume you're wearing um your nail color. If you have any nail color on and just make sure everything looks like a perfect memory in their mind: okay and so um, if you are going out to eat um, make sure wherever you choose to go is very it's not extravagant, but very you know cozy. It allows you to be close together. Allows you to sit closer together, allows you to feel like you're in an intimate setting. Some some cafes and restaurants have like these little corners or smaller tables to kind of push you closer together. Um. I also suggest um sharing like sharing more things like foods or um things like that. That way, it's a way to allow that other person to feel like they have to give you or they have to make sure you're, okay or they have to consider you leave enough for you. You know it's the consideration that helps the romance stay alive. When you share something like an ice cream or a bowl of fruit or a blanket or things like that, so make sure you're sharing more of whatever it is. Okay, um. I say the next thing i would say: number two would be to play play like children, because the best time in our lives was most likely when we were free, not paying any bills and just being playful and carefree. So do things that allow you to be playful so, for example like if you go to the beach like um after you've, been dating a while. You said, okay time to go to beach. Uh, maybe sit in the sand, build a sand castle. You know run run from the waves and you know play more than you just sit. There try to look good because playfulness releases a sense of nostalgia, which then creates like a lasting memory. You'Ll be like. Oh my gosh. I remember that time when we were at the beach and we built that same castle, it was so fun and you know, taking someone back to their childhood. Memories is totally a way to romanticize each. You know moment with that person um. Another way you can play is, like you know, sing your favorite songs in the car when y'all are driving, find some old songs from when y'all were growing up or that y'all like in common and just have fun. At the same time, there's no need to sit in awkward silence, you know, um, you don't have to be drunk to have fun and, seeing you know, um another way is to um, like lay close together like if you're in a relationship already, and you lay on The couch together or you have like a hammock outside or like some type of big um sitting place outside, make sure you're always sitting together, try not to do or sit separately um. If you can help it. You know what i'm saying so always be very near each other that way. Um like your smell, your scent and your touch, and you know the sound of your breath is always you know present with them. So it's very romantic to share and kind of stay closer together, even if it's for a moment like, if you're not very close to that person yet and you're building up to that um. Maybe just do it for a quick moment and then you know give them their space. So it's not super uncomfortable okay um, if you're to, if you're in a point in a relationship like where you can share food, i say: share like share ice cream share. Um eating together, but always have plenty so that you know the other person doesn't get mad because you ate all their food um. You know put it all together, maybe on a big plate and share it. You know people share popcorn in the movies, but, like i'm saying taking taking this to your home and sharing like more foods together on a plate or in a bowl um, which also makes you have to be in the same, you know space to share. I always say like keep flowers in your home um to remind him to buy them for you or keep flowers in your home or post on your internet or your pictures like fresh flowers. So when they see you - or they want to surprise you in some way or when they come over when they're at the store - and they see flowers, they they think of you, which and buying flowers, is also very romantic, so they'll bring them to you because they See that you really like them so keep flowers fresh, even if you have to post old pictures of flowers that you had it's like. Oh, i remember these flowers. They were so um blah blah blah blah nice and it just brightened up my room. I'M thinking about getting some more, you know it's if you're dating someone or someone wants to impress you they're gon na definitely show up with flowers, which is a very romantic notion on a date of course, okay, and not just because they feel like they have to At this point, they'll feel like you they want to because they know you like them. Okay, another way. Another way you can do like like, if you're having meals together, if you live together, make every meal seem or feel romantic, even if you're ordering takeout or he's cooking, have your table like really pretty. Have your use, the good dishes, you know um, if you don't like washing dishes, you know maybe get some cute um extra looking paper plates and use napkins and sit down at the table. Maybe light a candle on the table make everything extra romantic so that it becomes the norm. You know what i'm saying so like if he ever sits down to make a meal and eat with you and you always like candles at the table or you always have the table set. Really nice he's gon na automatically do that, because it's gon na feel incomplete um. If it's not done, you know what i think, if you always do it, then it's gon na seem normal, which creates a romantic ambiance, always so, if some stranger, which will walk into your house - and it was dinner time or you know tv time to watch tv, You have this candle lit and these the table set and you're sharing a blanket or a bowl of fruit and um. You smell good, and you have on soft. You know cute flowy fabric and look into each other's eyes more. You know, even if it's just for a second, if it's a new person. Thank you, johnny sprinkle sprinkles, if you are dating a new person, make sure to make eye contact and linger for a second before you look away this like automatically sparks romance when you are looking into someone's eyes so um and when you talk to them, make sure You'Re always looking into their eyes and maybe like if you're shorter than them. You know you can look up to them and it almost seems like oh i'm so helpless if you're about the same height tilt your head slightly down, but look up at them with your eyes like like you're, like he's your knight in shining armor or whatever. So if you're taller than him sit down so we're all in the same height and do the up, you know look up with the eyes, so um or just you know, give each other. Compliments on a daily basis find something to compliment each other about on a daily basis, so becomes the norm. This is how you create and keep romance and it'll just become habit after a while and then before you know it you'll be living a very romantic lifestyle with the person that you're with or the person that you're dating, even if you don't date them long term. If you use these habits in in every um, you know relationship or dating situation. That person is going to remember you, how you made their life um or that date or that date, that you went on memorable and special and how you made them feel there's just something about her. You know when i was with her things felt different. You know you know the fabrics that you wear the the how they flow. What you smell, like you know how soft you look and how you make him want to be more of a gentleman um. Looking soft and being more feminine makes a man want to be more gentleman like so um that romance factor is going to really be present when y'all are, you know together, um, and you know saying thank you please, and those sort of things are also very romantic Notions in dating or in a relationship so make sure to say those things um, and this will like have a very, very powerful impact on someone that you're dating, because, if you're out there dating and guys are used to um, you know certain types of women who Don'T have this factor or don't tend to create this type of romantic. You know way about themselves and way about how they live their lives and things like that, how they dress how they smell they're, going to remember you, above all, the others, because you are making them feel like life, can be different. Life can be romanticized with little effort. It'S almost effortless to you so um like, for example, you know how people are always extra and extra bougie, it's creating that romantic lifestyle like so, for example, if someone's over your house and you're having dinner and then after dinner, you have coffee or tea, and you Serve them in a regular old mug uh break out your cute. Tea sets like this, you know, have have the proper um dishes and the proper glasses wine glasses, the proper stuff for each type of you know, um drink or at least close to it. It doesn't have to be exact. You don't have to be like a stickler for being super extra proper, just have something on hand that will bring romance and specialness and a little bit touch of class to the environment. Ambiance sprinkle sprinkle janet appreciate that okay and a lot of times, if you're out there, you know trying to date and look for somebody with some money, they're looking for you to make them feel special too in some sort of way so bringing romance into um their Lives may be a huge change for them because they may not have had romance, they may have just been working or maybe they have a uh. You know an ex-wife that you know wasn't very romantic, or things just fell apart because they didn't do anything romantic, but by treating yourself in a romantic way and living in a romantic fashion. Yourself allows the man to feel like it's okay, because it's almost like speaking your language, okay hold on. I got ta what i got here. Oh my goodness, thank you. Sprinkle sprinkle got some cash. I got it on anyway um. So sometimes when a man is told, oh don't do this for a woman and don't do that for a woman, because you're going to think you're this and you're that you're going to think you're a scent. But if they're already doing those things for themselves, it allows them to feel like it's okay, because this is the norm for you, and so it's not expected because you are already doing it for yourself and so just to continue what europe you know. What the lady is already doing for herself does not make one quote-unquote ascent, it makes them observant, and you know, knowing that you know he's paying attention and knows how, to you know, get your attention and please you, so it will definitely help if you're treating yourself In a romantic way how you live, what you would i like what your environment looks like and that's why um, i posted a lot of stuff on my instagram recently to show like a sort of romantic type, vibe fairy tale like vibe, you know um feminine type, Vibe because it attracts the masculine men and it makes men who are may not seem extra masculine want to be more masculine, so it's also a way to bring out their masculinity. If you are, you know also showing your femininity um another way number three. Well, i i said a lot between number one two, so you can just make lists. It doesn't have to go into any specific order, but the third major thing that i would suggest - and i've tried this watching old movies, where men were actually romantic like way back in the day when men actually dressed up to go to dinner, when men actually pulled Out chairs and opened doors - and you know said romantic things and looked in the woman's eyes and you know grabbed them and danced and kissed and all kinds of stuff so make sure that you're watching some of those type of movies together and not just reality. Tv or modern stuff, where they don't do any of those things anymore and where it seems so far-fetched uh even hallmark movies, are a nice gesture for modern times. That are it's not too far-fetched um. But if you check out those old hollywood classic movies, they are, you know really like where the men were men and more masculine and well respected kind of like you know, maybe where they want to be and how they want to feel they'll kind of get some Type of instruction on how to you know be romantic with a woman without seeming, as if they're quote-unquote, being soft or being stamps so find an old romantic movie, or you know a lot of those movies appeal to both men and women because um they had like A lot of drama or action in it and then they had the romance as well, so it was very balanced, so um, maybe just have old movie night it just you, don't have to watch it like every night. Just have one night a week where you watch one old movie share some snacks popcorn, whatever put on your silky robe, just like your old hollywood and you know, have fun, get it get him in his um silk pajamas you go, go get on your satin robe And whatever and little fuzzy slippers and y'all have old hollywood movie night, it's a lot of times. Women um are so busy, and men are so busy these days if they can't get out for a date night or if they just want to chill at home, like if you're doing, netflix and chill do it in a classy romantic way. Because, like a lot of times, it's thursday night, your kids are in the bed or um. You got to go to work or you just don't feel like getting out or it's raining get get dressed up anyway. Go put on your perfume, go put on your makeup. Go put on your cute, robes and slippers and have him put on his uh fancy, stuff and y'all gon na be in the living room or the tv room or the theater room or whatever y'all do. Even if it's in the bedroom, you'll have a tv in your bedroom, which i do not recommend, because that takes all the romance out of any type of relationship. Do not have a tv in your bedroom, but if you do uh at least make the most of it by you know, putting on the proper pajamas light some candles, you know maybe pour some wine or drink some tea. I don't know whatever y'all want to drink, but make every moment feel like you're in just this romantic movie or whatever, and they will always remember you. They will always think back and say even if you're, not apart and y'all, are still together. The last movie i watched was a good movie. Oh, that was okay. She had on this nice road, she smelled good and we ate you know popcorn and drank wine. I don't know, but the memory of you and him together is always going to be romantic in his mind, which is going to stand far apart from any other woman he's been with. So that's how you create and keep romance in a relationship um. Now, as far as the friendship is concerned, it's the same thing except you're, not going to be all lovey-dovey or close, is you're just going to do things extra and make sure um you're appropriately dressed, and that you're making effort to um make every moment seem um, Like romanticized doesn't have to be romantic but romanticized like living in a fairy tale like going to visit a friend who is very um, you know extra and when you go to visit her or when they go to visit you they know. Oh we're gon na have so much fun. She always has the best. You know um wines or the best playlist of music, and she always has these really cool wine, glasses and hors d'oeuvres to eat or snacks. And she always you know she's dressed so pretty and smells good. Her home always smells good. I can't also romanticize a lot of um different aspects of your environment and how you dress as well, because a lot of times when people are attracted to you. It'S not just you physically or mentally, that they're attracted to it's also how you make them feel with your environment and how you present yourself and your lifestyle to them. Yeah so uh make sure you're. Also, keeping that in mind, if you are um trying to like respark your romance in a relationship that seems like it's fizzled out in start buying, like snacks and foods that insinuate romance like chocolate, covered strawberries, um, fresh fruit, you know things that make you think about Romance um wine um, where nicer and more uh cuter looking romantic clothes around the house um like some candles that maybe smell like fresh flowers or fruit or things that you know remind you of you, know fertility and things like that. Y'All know what i mean play some music, some soft music, always in the background. Sometimes we leave our tv on and have it blaring or we don't have anything on at all. If there's no sound creates create a soundtrack create a romantic soundtrack. So maybe you can have your phone get a wireless speaker and just have some um romantic ambiance music, just playing in the background, while you're pouring a glass of wine or relaxing on the sofa or whatever, whatever or even getting ready in the morning. With your makeup on put some music and light a candle, you know just for the ambiance and every time that you know he sees you or you see him. It'S going to be like the scene in a movie and it's just going to seem romantic um so make sure you do that. Make sure you do that if you are trying to create or maintain or respark the romance in any relationship um as far as dating um? And you can't go anywhere, because i mean you can't bring them to your house or you're, not going over their house you're, going out to a restaurant use, your clothes and your outfit, your hair, your makeup, your nails and your jewelry to emphasize the romance use um. The way you walk and talk to you know show show how romantic an evening that y'all are going to have so satin silks softer colors champagne colors. When you order your food order, romantic food um, you know uh, make sure you smell, really good and talk in a softer voice and make that eye contact and maybe um you know, find a way to be close to that person temporarily, like maybe, if you're waiting For ballet staying close i'll, say: oh it's a little bit cold or you know, sit next to them at the table. If you have a choice of you know where you're gon na sit, um or temporarily, like lean in and like say something quiet to them, so that you're in the proximity, a closer proximity that seems very romantic, so uh-huh, you said we need to stop looking dusty. True, true and like you know some days, i just want to go and run errands, and i just you know and some days i want to feel romantic and so on those type of days i like i, tend to look more and feel more that way, and I surround myself with certain things: wear certain colors certain perfumes and speak in a different tone of voice, and that's how i'm feeling that day. You know and so make sure. If that's what you're trying to convey if you're trying to convey romance and when someone thinks about you, they correlate you with oh romance you're gon na wrote, you know they're gon na bring the romance on because they know that's what you like, and they know that You know that's where you're comfortable at that's and they're comfortable there too, because you allow them to feel comfortable being romantic because you're already there so, okay, sprinkle sprinkle y'all, only read some of these comments. You said you wish your mom. Wasn'T a people pleaser and demanded more from your dad and men in general, i'm trying to undo the picking program we'll leave by example, darling. You say your dad is so unromantic, but my mom isn't that feminine yeah well a lot of times we're not going to have good examples unless we create them. You know what i'm saying unless we create them, um or maybe like if you're older and your parents are already set in their ways um and you want them to be more romantic. Maybe you try, you know, setting out the the bait you know, buy some chocolate covered. Strawberries buy some fresh fruit, buy them some wine, you know, encourage them to celebrate certain things and maybe recommend them watching an old movie together, like maybe recommend them doing certain things and if they you know want to, they will. But it's not our jobs to make our parents more romantic. You know they are from a different generation than we are, and maybe they didn't have time to be romantic or you know feel like it was necessary, but you know we're in a we're in a new um era, where you know, women and men are able to Work more from home now and you know, have more um because there's more opportunity available, so we do have a little bit more time, um how to handle jealousy with family friends during your engagement. Well, you know, there's always probably going to be some type of jealousy or envy or whatever just allow that to feel whatever way you need it to feel like okay, well, the attention is on me because i'm engaged um. This is just gon na. You know help other people want to get engaged and they're, not really jealous of you they're just wishing it was them, that's all and they don't know how to you know, direct that feeling. So it's directed through jealousy, they just wish it was them. Okay, that's it! I mean that's the only reason right they just wish it was them instead of you. It'S like you know, but you know it could be you if you do what you got to do. I don't know. Oh sprinkle sprinkle alexandra appreciate that yeah. I wouldn't. I wouldn't even pay attention to it. It'S distracting for what you're trying to do. You know you got wedding plans to get together, don't even think about it. Who cares? Let them be jealous? It'S not your problem. It'S theirs. You know um another way to um keep and create romance is to have a routine or a weekly. Like tradition, you know, half breakfast every sunday at a certain spot. You know have something to look forward to together so that during the week you know when maybe he's at work or you're running around doing errands. Like you can't you know, you can't wait for a certain day or you look forward to a certain day of spending. Um time together, even if it's not date, even if it's just grabbing something to eat, because sometimes people don't see eating as dates, especially when you live together. So if you live together, you know going out to eat at a certain place, every um or cooking a certain meal, every whatever we it's something to look forward to um so or even if it's not cooking or eating, maybe just shopping going to a farmer's market Or you know shopping online together and something whatever it is that you look forward to you know sitting out in the backyard on the patio in the garden or something you know talking sipping a mimosa. I don't know whatever whatever it is, do it every week and make sure that it's weekly and that you both look forward to it. Okay, like i'm starting to write down some ideas that i want to implement in my life weekly and it's nice and special to have someone to share it with so i'm going to make my list right now what i want to do every sunday i want mimosas There is a good idea or some type of drink brush drink on the patio. I don't care what patio it could be. Our patio, a restaurant patio, but i know i better be some okay. The real me is coming out now i never better be some champagne and some orange juice up in this piece. Okay, okay and they'll - start to like it like it too, because it's something for them to look forward to and they all thoroughly enjoy. It too play some music, and then you know to go along with your routine or weekly romantic venture. You know, make sure you have the proper attire, so don't just go looking crazy make sure you have your brunch or mimosa attire on whatever that may be. For you have some music going make them dress too? Okay, they got to be dressed too, don't make them, but just if you dress first they'll most likely put on some clothes but um and just start with something very simple like that, and maybe you can, you know, make it more extravagant. If you know on special occasions or holidays or if you invite other people over to share whatever but make sure it's a weekly thing, um or it could be margaritas mimosas, whatever you like to drink, it could be tea or what whatever it doesn't matter, but make Sure you create something that both of you know and can count on for sure to be together and spend time again a lot of times. Uh couples and people don't talk enough during the week or they're afraid to share some news, or they just forget, because they're so busy, but if you make time and you're doing something fun together, it also allows people to feel more um open, and you know wanting To open up more, if they're, having a good time with you uh, so even if it's just for with friends like a group of friends do the same thing every week have like okay, it's sunday, it's girls, night or saturday, or you know, meet me for drinks Or come over my house for this, and it doesn't have to last a long time, maybe an hour or two, and then you know it's done, but yeah make sure you're spending more time together. That'S memorable and fun and doing the things that you like to do right and that way they always have something to look forward to every week. If they're having a bad week, it's like okay! Well, i know i can depend on those you know margaritas or those mimosas, and i i really want to wear my new cute dress, because many people have clothes they don't have anywhere to wear. They may not have a date that week, why am i dressed and go look cute and maybe afterwards i can go out and also and get you out doing more and maybe wanting wanting to be more creative and uh venture out to different places. You know we don't know, what's going to come after the mimosas or the margaritas, you might just get um, you know inspired to go shopping or to go to a a movie or a play or whatever i don't know, walk around the museum who knows, but at The same time, it's going to get you up and out and doing something um on a weekly basis with each other. Okay, and it you don't have to say date night, because sometimes labels it makes people cringe, because i know it crying when i hear date. Night act ranch, i don't wan na like date night, that's like i got ta write down like it sounds like a chore. You know what i'm saying, but if you rename it sunday, mimosas or saturday uh whatever drinks or tea or um, you know whatever food. If you want to like put it as a food thing, you know chop chocolate, sundaes and like eat ice cream, and do chocolate covered strawberries and stuff like even if you include your kids and stuff, or you know saturday, sushi right whatever it does sound. Like date night, it sounds like fun for everyone and there's no pressure. There'S no thing. I got ta go to date night, it's almost like you have to date. Oh no, it's not! It shouldn't be like that. It should be like fun period, romantic period. That'S why i cringe at the word date night like it sounds like an obligation that most people the woman wants and the man is like burdened with, because all the pressure is on him and he's got to make sure he's on day night. But if he feels like date, night is more for both of you guys like uh drinks, fun and you know guys - are attracted to fun and activity, and you know feeling a certain type of way not date. Night date, night sounds like pressure. You know what i'm saying so: rename it rename date night and make it a tradition, and it doesn't even seem like a date, because you can invite other people. You can include your kids or you can just be alone. Whichever is most convenient. Oh thank you. Alexa sprinkle sprinkle, i see you a member she's been a member for two months: sprinkle spicy, girl, okay, um, definitely uh, stop also start with the labels or so much stuff like stop putting labels on everything. You know how some people call okay. This is my wife. This is my husband, maybe come up with a cute romantic name for each other or nickname with each other. If you don't have one, if or um like a lot of people say. Oh, this is my wife when they introduce you sometimes maybe like if you're, if you're a guy listening, you can introduce her as oh. This is my one and only true love or you can. If you're a lady, you can introduce your man like. Oh, this is my knight in shining armor. You know they make their introductions it. This can be around friends or, like you, know, casual acquaintances and things like that, but make sure you make them feel a little bit more special and romantic when you introduce them. This is the um, the light of my life, the apple of my eye, the you know whatever make it seem like that. Oh this is my hood. This is my knight in shining armor, okay, this is my sugar daddy see. It sounds much better than saying this. My boyfriend uh this, my sugar, daddy or this is my uh husband who's a lot older. This is my knight in shining armor. That means he'll treat you like that too. If you keep introducing him like that, he's gon na be always coming to your rescue. Trying to get you stuff make sure you're taking care of us put it in their mind. You know what, if you're not attracted to your sugar daddy? Well, then pull that night cap down, you know, put pull that arm around the face, like looking like strict rescue. Fiona, i don't know, but still whatever it's still going to make it more romantic if you, even if he doesn't look good if he's referred to him as knight in shining armor he's going to act. That way - and maybe you won't see this anymore - okay, how convince your boyfriend to dress less athletic and more date, casual dressed up, um start watching more movies, where people actually dress and compliment other people's clothes. When you see them, like you see a man, that's nicely dressed like. Oh, i really like that shirt. Don'T say i like that shirt on him unless you try to make him jealous like oh, i really like that shirt. I would look so good that pattern won't look so good on your skin tone or something like that. Don'T say on you because it looks like comparing them. So i always say your skin tone or your your your build. So it looks like you don't like the shirt on him, but it would look better on him. You know what i'm saying: oh molar, sprinkle sprinkle sprinkle appreciate that so, like all that pattern would look so good on your skin tone or that color will look so good on your skin tone or that fit will look so good on your build um. You should you should go. You should go, try something like that on like make it romantic like. Let'S go to the store, and i want you to try some stuff on. You know turn me on and if he sees how it turns you on like just from trying it on like in the store he's gon na go ahead and buy that okay and he'll be more likely to dress up for you. If he knows that's, what's gon na get you going okay, so whenever he's dressed in athletic, wear be like humdrum, but then when he gets in his nice clothes, you know act all like you're into him. You know if holidays come up. You know. Um suggest. You know we need to get some something like go to like plan formal places to go so that he's forced to wear nicer things. You know um, instead of just casual places, playing formal places to go like i want to go to this, and i want to go to that. I want to go see this. You know i want to go to the symphony or for my birthday, i want tickets to the symphony. Even if you don't like the symphony, it's what it's going to do it's going to help him dress better and you know feel some type of way more leveled up and it's romantic and you may learn to like the symphony i don't know or the orchestra, but It'Ll get him out of athletic wear and you into a nice environment, and he may feel more important, more romantic and more manly dressed like a man, and he may start to do more of that. You guys, you know, go out. So it's up to you. You lead that man on how to treat you so if you're, okay, with him dressing like that and going places where it's okay for him to dress like that um, then he might continue to do that. So what you're gon na have to do is you know kind of? What do you want for your birthday? I want uh tickets to the orchestra or the symphony. You know he can't show up there, no shorts and no t-shirts. You know he's gon na have to go, buy something. Okay with your sugar act. Daddy asks money back and threatens to lodge complaint against you. If you don't give it back, make sure you recording that on your phone, then, once you give me money, that's a gift! Baby there's no loan involved. The word loan and borrow was never discussed. You gave me that money. Do you go to the strip club and ask some strippers for your money back nope goodbye, tell him you'll, give it give it back to his wife or his ex. How about that girl? I would never. I would laugh in his face. I wouldn't even take that question seriously like. Are you serious give your money back? Do you get money back from strippers same same thing, baby you low on ones, okay, tell him to file a complaint. It'S gon na cost him more money to file a complaint than it is to get your little money back. Just tell him you just like i'm a stripper. He gave me money, i'm giving it back lie. Can'T can't give you your money back and when, once once you lay it down in the strip club, you can't pick it back up baby. I girl. I wish i wish someone would ask me for their money back. They would be laughing and calling them a comedian, because that's not possible um, you got. You got a cute little. Tea set la peaches with purple and gold accents. Oh, i bet that is pretty. It'S friends, would you keep getting the stuff from the other guy, or would you just live your best life and allow your baby father to take care of everything i don't know like it depends what if this stuff is necessary and you need it if it's not, It'S just more like a greed thing than maybe um, i don't know it depends on how you want to feel you know, um how you would treat yourself. You know if you're married and you are off the market and you want more and your husband is just not listening to you. Maybe you got to find a way to give yourself more, but at the same time it's all up to your moral standards and what you believe in like for me. You know i'll be like experimenting with my moral standards, i'll see what i feel afterwards. I don't know, but the same time it's up to you, your child's father and you live in two different states. I can get things from a guy: okay, pumpkins. You know how to do it. It'S like long distance, sometimes works out huh for you. Okay, so definitely um. You know you can get a lot more as well from men if you live that romantic lifestyle on your own, like you, expect more like it's going to take a lot to maintain your lifestyle than it would someone who's not living that doesn't want fresh flowers in Their home every day that doesn't require silk and soft satiny clothes, even though you don't really have to wear them every day, but just when you're around him, someone that doesn't need um. You know a particular uh way of doing things, so the more extra you are and the more special you make him feel the more he's going to want to maintain you so that you can make him still feel that way. You know so make sure you just when you're around then make sure you have everything that you need. Look how you need to looks, know how you need to smell speak how you need to speak in order to. Let them know that you are, you know, um have certain standards that have to be met, because that are those are your personal standards and so you're not going to take anything less from another person. So if you got to have your chanel perfume, you know you don't wear nothing cheaper um! He ain't gon na bring you that cheaper. Okay! If you only have this on your shelf well other stuff in a similar price range, he ain't gon na bring him in cheaper. Okay. If you only have certain types of um things in your pantry or in your home or certain, you know, ambiance he's not going to take you to somewhere ratchet or expect you to live somewhere else. That'S not up to your standard, and, if he's you know bringing more to your life, he's not going to expect you to downgrade or stay the same if you're with him so he's gon na kind of level you up, um would be my advice to daughters if They started college they've been dating someone their age with nice degree, since must there be an age guy? No, i i feel like every okay, i'm just gon na say this. Honestly, i've been a lot a long time. Every couple that i know that got together in college, both of them work both of them work. The woman ends up surpassing the men most of the time because, let's just face it at the same age, with the same opportunities, women and men, women tend to are tend to multitask, better. You know and achieve more in certain. You know careers, so i mean depending on what lifestyle you want and remember men age better than women. So when he's up there in his you know stature tenure and his career he's going to be attracted to 20 something year olds. While you know the woman is going to be raising the kids and super busy trying to juggle career and motherhood, so this is the only reason that i say either get with someone with more money than you or uh some sort of age gap. It is possible to have a very nice life, but fast forward 15 years. It'S gon na stay that way. Okay, so i don't know i like. If i were to think about it, i wouldn't do it. I could. I don't want to have to worry about all that, but for other people, if they can, if they see that they can make it work, they're willing to sacrifice and um. You know work on their marriage and make sure those things don't happen or if they do happen, they're able to move forward and then whatever, but i would rather have the advantage. That'S just me, look i'm going in with the advantage on, but everybody doesn't feel like they need an advantage until they do okay, so i feel like i want the advantage period. I want it. If you don't want it or feel like you need it, then you know the age gap is not important, so i hope that this video was helpful. I'M going to be on here all day um. I hope you wrote down some notes and got what you needed and start to live a more a more romantic style of style, type, lifestyle um make sure you know if you're on a budget and you need to raise extra money, you know definitely look around your Home see what you can use, give away or sell resell like poshmark or something like that. Get your little extra money or you know, shop, thrift or you know, do diy and make stuff - or maybe you know, get things as gifts when it's a gift-giving time ask for what you want like to decorate with, or you know certain types of clothing or you Know maybe, like wine, glasses or teeth, ask for things that are going to make your life more romantic versus just you know a gift card or something you can. You know you're not going to really use so use gift, giving time as ways to you know check off your wish list and things like that. Okay, that's what i did um, but it's very useful like if, if people ask you what you want, you might as well, let them know um something that you can definitely use. Even if it's lessons for something like you want to learn how to play an instrument or make certain types of um desserts or something make sure, maybe you just get like a gift certificate for three lessons or for something um, a gift card or whatever, or if Someone asks like what you want to do for a date. You want to take some type of lesson. You know how they do. One of those dating shows where they go and take a listen from like some dude like the ice sculpture, or something like that. Maybe suggest like um like, if you always want to know how to make sushi like find somewhere where they have like sushi making classes or um. You know dessert or vegan cooking, or something like that. I don't know but make sure that you're like especially if you're, not sure, you're gon na um date, that guy long term - and it's just you know, friendship or you know getting to know that person suggest dates after they've impressed you that you can benefit from like A wine tasting you can learn about wine and that's also very romantic and a lot of times it's very cheap as well for the guy. But then once you get to chasing that wine, you might want to go out and hang out and stuff like that. So it could lead to more, you know so make sure just suggest dates if they ask if what you suggest be creative and he'll always remember that it's not almost just going out to eat all the time. It'S like. Oh, i remember that day when i went out with such-and-such and we learned how to make vegan sushi or i remember that time we learned how to make um. You know whatever ice sculptures, i don't know or we painted that photo together while we sipped wine or that you know we painted this picture together, while we sipped mine and then we went to this cool, you know place and danced, and you know sometimes benefiting from Your dates as well is very romantic because they'll always remember you because they learned something. It was different than all the others and they'll romanticize your date more than they will other people, and so you'll always be like the one that special one they'll be trying to compare. All the other women to you or they'll be suggesting your suggestions to go out on dates with other women um after if they're casually dating but they'll always remember you, and it was your idea. Um y'all are y'all are what you say should be thinking about whether he can support you or not. Exactly like honestly, if you can't support me, you might as well not even look like anything. Okay, there's nothing worse than a broke. Pretty boy! Okay, you might will be ugly if you can't afford me period. Okay, i i honestly that's just my mentality, i'm not going to struggle to work hard to support you and me, or just myself, and you support yourself. We won't be together and you're going to take me off the market when i could be living a you know, a nice life doing way way less. Okay, i'm not that's just who i am. I like. I like advantages. I like head starts. I like extra. I don't like all that you know doing building stuff together. I don't like all of that. That'S not who i am it's not very romantic either and um not for me. I don't see that as romance. I see that as a trick and i'm not going to fall for the okie doke. Sorry um. I can't i mean it and i don't blame it on anything. It could be in some people's culture and how they're raised, but we each have our own individual standards and apart from culture or how your parents raise you, it doesn't matter. What do you want? Okay and you, i would never feel guilty for having my own set of standards that i am in charge of, because that's what's going to make me happy, i'm not going to live by someone else's standards and expect for myself to be happy living understanders that i Don'T even like i'm going to live under my own standards, and i'm saying i said what i said period: that's how it has to be that's how it has to be for me. Otherwise i i i won't. I rather you be ugly and able to support me than you look like this and can't can't put in can't put the whole thing on. You know how to say i put something on it. You can't put it all, then i don't want you period everything at least 99 percent baby like i can't. I won't see you as man i'll i'll, see you as a choice for the day for the night for the evening for the for the month. For the week, but you're not long term, okay, just how men high standards, women have standards too, and we shouldn't be punished for our standards if men are punished for their. I never think that men um feel the same way about a woman's standards as they feel about their standards if they feel like. Oh, you got to be this and you got to be that for me to be with you for you to pay half the half. The bills you got to be perfect, no, you don't. If you got. If, just if those standards are that high with a man, then yours can be even higher. Ladies okay, if a man wants you to be perfect and then ask you for money at bill time, your standards need to be 20 times higher than that. You said the money ain't everything comment, it's not everything, but it does shift the power in the relationship and the respect and the relationship. Okay, money is a tool, but it's also um. What gives you um your power in a relationship or the respect in a relationship or your security in a relationship? I can't depend if, if you can't pay my bills and i'm stressed out, i'm not going to be turned on, i don't. I don't want to talk to you. I don't want to be near you. I don't want to smell your stinky cologne, because it's going to remind me of broke okay, so that's how it feels to me. I won't be able to be near you if you're not paying all these bills. Okay, your cologne is going to start to register cheap. In my mind, okay and every time i smell somebody at that cologne - i think i'm broke so if you're, a man and you're trying and you're trying to find the perfect woman and expects her to be all that they don't want her to pay money at build Time, don't wear no cologne, because if she smell that cologne or somebody else, it's just going to ruin it for him all right. How many women actually have that story where you can't stand the smell of a cologne, because somebody that you used to date wore it and they were broke or cheap or a dusty i'll, wait um? And if you like, a guy and they're wearing that sink along, you suggest a new cologne like. Oh, you should wear this. It smells so much better if a woman is suggesting you another cologne. That means the one you have on reminds her of someone. She don't like, don't take it as personal, just change it, or else you're gon na get you're gon na you're gon na get the wrath, so romantic life create romance, treat yourself the same way and men will treat you the same way. Definitely don't volunteer to do too much. Allow them to cater to you always um. You go places, allow the wait, staff and whoever to cater to you, ask suggestions, thank them for their suggestions like oh, what is the special for today? Oh that sounds so delicious. Could you bring that to me, you know, allow people to cater to you like you, don't do nothing, basically and don't be afraid to ask like don't be afraid to ask for things that you expect and that are your standards like like after a long day, you Take your shoes off and it's like: oh, could you massage my feet, honey, whatever, don't even think about not asking like that should be normal. You, you don't even need to ask after the third or fourth time, uh, oh eminence, brick, sprinkle! Thank you shira. How can you connect okay, um? You need to join the patreon darling and um. There'S five slots available um, i think yeah um, i think, there's four slots available. Maybe five slots, depending on the rotation so definitely join the patreon and the phone call tier and you'll get a monthly phone or also a letter. If you do, the mailing tier um like i, should keep keep pretending so join tier 2 and up to get um a lot of the lives and movie nights and tea time and join the tier that says phone call. If you want to schedule a phone call. Okay, make sure you write me in the messages on my patreon um. I appreciate that you guys are meant to step up when you are done working hard good for you look, i'm done working, i'm done exactly when you're done. You die when you are done. There'S nothing a man can do to make you undone you just gon na have to either move on or you're gon na have to hire your standards and do something else. So most men aren't romantic, though, like getting paid, helps to ignore that aspect. If you live romantically and do everything you do everything romantic, they're, gon na feel awkward and out of place, if they're not matching you, you know what i'm saying when a man wants to feel close to you, they kind of like you, know, mimic you or you Know do things that you're doing to make it feel like they're into what you're doing so if you dress the part, if you walk around in a silk or satin robe with a glass or goblet of wine or water, whatever you're drinking, if you have romantic music Playing they're gon na have to follow suit, there's no way around it. What are you gon na? Do? Okay, you have to leave that aspect of it and make it seem like this is the norm and once it becomes your norm, it will become what he is expected to do. Okay, you have to and it'll just get them going. You don't have to always. You know be the one to start the romance: it's just. You have to live that lifestyle romance is not okay. Well, let's turn on the romance today and then turn it off. No, it has to be a lifestyle, that's it whenever you watch movies and people um. Thank you alexa. Whenever you have people on tv, they don't just have a romance for one section of the movie. The whole movie is a romance. That'S why they name it a romance a romantic comedy or romance, because the whole thing is romantic, so it's sort of like you know, going on a diet. You can't just go on a diet for two weeks and then expect to stay the weight that you are. You have to change your style of eating, um change, your lifestyle, so, in order to create and keep romance, you have to change your lifestyle to that of a romantic lifestyle. Every aspect, especially when you're in the presence of whoever it is that you are trying to be romantic with now. I understand, like you're, not always going to be living this romantic lifestyle when you're in a rush or in a hurry, or you know, trying to hurry up and get dressed and get somewhere. But whenever you can, whenever you're, conscious and aware of it, do it um? If it's tier three, if it says um phone call, definitely that's the one, but if it doesn't say phone call, then um you can you can uh change it to the one that says phone call, sprinkle sprinkle and this is on the shira7 patreon, because i have Two patreons um, you said you hate, clingy man, you say you got no sugar, mama good for you all right as long as you happy girl. That'S all it matters right how to please them. If we are just in a relationship, not married, don't want to do the wifey duties well, um, how to please them? Okay, it's not about pleasing them! Darling! It'S about them! Pleasing you! That'S number one! The wrong question wrong question: how can you make them? Please you that means treat yourself how you want them to treat you and let them witness so that when they try to please you or when they try to get your attention, they know exactly what to do exactly what you like and exactly your standards. Okay, so please yourself: first, have flowers in your apartment or your home when they come over, have candles with it had ambiance going have nice glasses?