Common Sense Has To Be Learned #Parenting #Momlife #Parentingtips #Hair #Hairstyles #Hairdye

Khylei Keller: Me trying to explain to my Dad “actually we DONT know better cuz you never told us it wasn’t ok in the FIRST place”

Artsy Goddex: I will say this is also true for older kids/teens/young adults. There's a lot I myself don't know and my parents get upset that I don't...even though they have never made the effort to explain the things to me. (I do better at learning things when someone is actually teaching it to me)

Sam C: I tell my grandpa all the time “common sense comes from common experiences.” My teenage cousins simply don’t have the common experiences my grandpa did, so they don’t have the same senses around those experiences that he expects them too. We are all learning. ❤️

Adrian Celeste: Exactly. I used to hate when my mom said "it's common sense" I always wanted to say "actually it's not since I haven't learned it yet" but I wasn't trying to catch hands

japanimated123: I feel like these vids are helping to heal my trauma lol. Glad to know there's hope for having my own kids and being able to teach them healthier ways to communicate.

ijornhribrudkrvir: I appreciate this a lot. I remember so many times where I got yelled/snapped at by friends parents, not even my own, for not knowing their house rules and how they differed from my own. It felt unfair because I truly had no way of knowing what behaviour they would seem "wrong" and it caused so much stress. It's hard enough as a kid knowing, remembering and following your own house rules. It's all new. Please be kind to kids everyone

rleering420: When I was about her age I remember thinking that everyone had different hair that would only grow to a specific length, because my mom always had short hair growing up, kinda like yours except she spiked it up with gel. It makes me smile looking back on it, children truly have such fun ways of figuring the world out for themselves. I also used to think that “Walt Disney” meant “Walmart Disney” for some reason lol.

Fiona Fox: These vids make me tear up a little bit, part because I’m so happy for your children that they get to learn how to be a person in a loving and understanding way. The other part makes me tear up because little me would’ve had a better childhood if my parents were like you ❤

Kitskitt: when my daughter was five, we moved into a new house that had a ton of box elder bugs. one day she came out of her room, upset. I asked what was wrong and she goes " I took all the boxes out of my room but there's still bugs in my room!" awe baby.

Jasmine Jenkins: Common sense isn't real until you learn something

Her Royal Hannah: That's true for adults too. My manager recently said to me "You know a lot, and that's great, but there are still things you don't know yet, and my job is to figure out what you don't know, so I can help you to learn it." I'd never had anyone, not a boss, a teacher, or a parent, say something like that to me before, I was amazed but also really pleased, because the pressure didn't feel like it was all on me to just know things or not screw up, she recognized that part of her job was making sure I knew the stuff and that I couldn't be expected to know what I didn't know or to know that I don't know it

Loveandlight1996: You really are inspiring!! Your videos always put me in an upbeat mood but also help me to reflect and re teach my self with new perspectives because I wish my parents saw your videos while I was growing up!!!

Tara McMahon: I have to say I love hearing your parenting stories. I wish I’d been raised the way you are raising your children. ❤

Kenny🐝: Can you break a rule you don't know? My mom: yes, and you'll pay for it too! We need more parents like Tori, kind and understanding ❤️

Emily Ortega: Hey I’m a substitute teacher and I honestly love your videos! I have learned so much not only with gentle teaching but also being gentle with myself. This one makes alot of sense if I go into a class thinking it’s gonna be great but be exhausted before lunch I have to remember I didn’t tell them my rules and they wouldn’t know what my rules are if I didn’t tell them. Because my rules are completely simple but they are still learning.

Jasper Bearfoot: that is the most adorable conversation between a child and a parent I've ever heard! and even if she didn't know she still had logic thinking that your hair didn't go back cuz she didn't know you kept cutting it that shows she's got good comprehension skills. and also a desire to understand by asking questions. kudos and then she always have the need to explore this world of ours and such a precious thing that oftentimes in our adolescents were shamed for.

this is a channel….: i may never want to be a parent, but you and mama cusses have made me feel a lot more confident if i ever am one

Kassia Behrmann: She should definitely get the #1 Mom award of the year!!! Love the hair and makeup❤️❤️

Faith Midnight: I feel like you're the kind of person who would never say "you're an adult you should know that already" and I like that. I can't count the number of times I heard that phrase in reference to something I was never taught or something that just didn't click in my brain.

Rose Gold: If only my dad thought this way I wouldn't be in therapy ‍♀️. You have a wonderful parenting style and I've taken a lot of your tips for raising my daughter and unlearning toxic behavior taught by my parents. ❤️

SasskiF: As a kid who had a very international family, all of whom had extremely different ideas of what common sense was, I can attest that it isn’t easy to know what people expect of you without them explicitly stating it first.

Moss Reilly: This actually makes a lot of sense to mw now bc I remember when I was in trouble as a little kid the adults would be yelling at me “you should know better” and me just being confused because I *didnt* know any better

S. Basgic: Facts, momma! You are a treasure, girl! Thanks for this reminder to be gentle and intentional to our young minds. ❤️

keleiki6: Thank you! I have a lot of emotional damage that I still have a hard time coping with because I was constantly told I had no common sense growing up. It really hurts to be made to feel stupid, your self confidence takes a hard hit and is difficult to build back up, even with therapy. I'm a mechanical engineer but I still feel like I'm so stupid almost all the time :/

HannahJ: I love your videos as a childless adult. They way you explain everything makes you remember to be nice to yourself. My mum has just started therapy and I will mention your videos, she finds them useful too, to remind her to give herself a break and be kind to herself

Portland Musical Protests: we thank you greatly. revisiting this conversation with our selves is a huge kindness.

M AS: I wish more people could realize this! I've been saying this for years, thank youuu for always sharing your life advice

Shahrezad1: I had a similar conversation with a coworker about the highschoolers we work with. People think that once students reach high school they should "know better". About self care, communication and interpersonal relationships, and accountability. But...do they know better? Has anyone taught them, or did they just hop from middle school to high school and haven't changed all that much? Maybe there should be a mandatory class on that for Freshman year.

Instantnoodle: That's exactly the thing I've been trying to explain my mum. I get shit on a lot cause of this. The problem is i never learned to do a lot just because of this, i was always told to think logical to the point i make up a logical way of emotions/feelings and seeing them somewhat like a math problem. I hate math, because of this reason i hated to learn things that are not logical to me in some way, i have troubles learning in school and the list goes on forever. So parents please remember common sense is something you learn, not know. :)

nylecoj: love this so much, as a child i always hated when my parents just said i shouldnt have done something without explaining it to me, we cant know something if they never teach us

Natalia: this is SO important i struggle with confidence and not feeling stupid to this day because i got screamed at for not knowing things that were “obvious” as a kid

Cal: I grew up with a father with NPD and your videos are so healing for me. your children are incredibly lucky to have you :)

Diana King: Can you please be the official YouTube mom? Pretty Please ? I wish more adults understood this concept ❤️ Edit to add: Your channel is criminally underrated. If anyone deserves to blow up on YouTube it's you. Your love, logic and positivity is something all of us could use a good dose of

Chy Chy: This really stuck out to me. As I was growing up I was constantly told to "use my common sense " and I'll never forgot how it made me feel.

Sharkastic: Honestly, kid logic is adorable. I love how they try to work out the world around them, it's so creative and usually brilliant based on the info they're working with.

Teagan N: lollll this reminds me of when I was a kid and I thought hair dye was PERMANENT, like if you dyed your hair it would always grow back that same color, no matter what. thankfully now I’ve learned better and dye my hair all the time! :)

Lauralie Lefebvre: One of the things I remember the most from my childhood was the first time I rolled my eyes at my dad. He got super mad and lectured me for quite some time. Younger me had no idea what she had done wrong so I asked him what was so wrong about looking up while he was talking to me. He never answered. I found out what it meant later while watching my favourite cartoon. I would have loved for him to explain it to me that day…

Randi Levson: Your empathy is amazing. It takes a while for kids to learn right from wrong. Darn. I wanted to see how your hair colour turned out in this video.z

Gorilla Ham: your videos help me to be more patient with my daughter and to help me remember how I felt when I was little and how I wanted to be treated. and to try my damnedest to treat my daughter that way. Thanks for being here. :)

Tony Stark: This reminds me of the other day, my mom used a word I know in a context I've never heard it in. I was confused and she rephrased it, but then I was like "Wait, I'm not correcting you, I'm genuinely curious, is that word often used in that context?" I had to specify because a childhood of undiagnosed autism and adhd has given me the reputation of being too literal or pedantic and didn't want her to think I was nitpicking her wording. She did tell me it is used in that context. And I wonder if that was common sense to her? I know it's not the exact same concept but that's what this reminded me of.

insert cheesy pun here: YES. i try to share this all the time but it never gets through. everything is learned by either observation or direction. if someone has never been taught, and if they never got the chance to observe it or put the pieces together, they'll never realize it. it's like expecting someone to know a word in a language they don't understand. maybe someone will be able to put the pieces together, but generally they won't understand it until you teach them.

KSangel180: I wish my Mom had done this. I remember getting so stressed out as a kid cause I was scared that I would do something that I should have known. Can't wait to raise my kids with understanding.

Jordan Boyer: This can be applied to basic life skills too. Parents are responsible for teaching a child how to do something not expecting them to know how to do it right off the bat. Great wording

Holly Jorge: Yes!!! It's also so easy to think that all your kids know something because you've taught one of them that thing but realise later on that they didn't even exsist when you taught the first one. (My brother, and a couple of my cousins, are ten years older than me so adults would be shocked when I didn't know how to do stuff around the farm)

Alyssa Spring Reynolds: My favorite story is the dad who kept telling his kid to stop throwing stuff off the balcony. The kid kept doing it till the dad snapped. The kid tearfully asked “dad what’s a balcony?” Kids need to be taught and sometimes even adults too

stormdancer oblivion: You're such a wonderful parent and you're raising your munchkins to be awesome people and you're teaching others with your stories

Bethany Varner: Ive never thought of that, common sense is learned. It's always interesting what some adults view as common sense, and others don't. Do you have a tattoo tour video? I'd love to see them up close.

BeatlesNinja: Parenting is a constant change because your kids are learning new dynamics in life. Whenever my daughter does something that is technically breaking a rule or being disrespectful, we have a conversation about why it was wrong and more specifically how it affects them or other people. The conversation always includes the statement "you're not in trouble right now because you didn't know this was wrong, but now you do and we expect better". When it happens again, because it always happens again, we remind her of that conversation and ask her to explain why it's wrong. And she usually does so without much prompting. Then the punishment comes and she knows what happens when that rule is broken. Punishment without understanding doesn't do anything to fix the problem. And punishing a kid for a rule or behavior they didn't even know was an issue is kind of just cruel.

DarePlayz: I was around 7-8 when I cut off my hair to have short hair like Tori’s! Donated it to make wigs for kids in need. I felt like a superhero that day ☺️

Breann Hill: Girl I’m loving going on this hair journey with you

Naomi G Wolfé: This reminds me of a time I accidentally cursed as a small child making random noise combination. My mom or aunt (I forgot) immediately told me to be quiet and not say that. I didnt understand there were "bad words: and "good words" only that I said something that wasnt in the preset of words I've been taught. I grew to fear saying words or sounds that arent commonly used, and gave up entirely making random noises. Thanks for making me feel better. Have a great day

hilliard girl: As an adult, you are always learning and common sense Is always changing with society. Sometimes you're wrong...that's life.

Endergirl374: I may not have kids of my own but I do have a nephew who is 4 months old and your videos are fun and helpful for me to learn how to treat and act around kids. I am also a big fan of your personality because you have shown that you are beautiful both physically and mentally . We need more understanding people out there.

Mz. Carter: When my daughter first cut her hair, my aunt’s response was “ida tore her up”……the feeling behind saying “why would you whoop her for something nobody had ever told her is not ok” and then letting that lead me into all the ways their entire gen(boomers) was not better parents than us(millennials and down), was orgasmic

Nicole Osowski: Ahh, I was told too many times as a child that I had no common sense, thanks for this vid, not all parents can show up at the exact right moment for us. I love my mum and dad. But shit, don't tell your kids they don't have common sense!

SSA Cameron Adam: this video genuinely kinda got myself to forgive myself for something i did as a child. i found this little thing that fell off a fake bouquet and it didn’t have a tag on it and so i brought it home for my mom and i got in a lot of trouble and had to go back to the store and apologize but i didn’t know any better, no body explained it to me.

Miao: My mom is like, thinking her kids should know everything perfectly after either telling us just once how it works or if she never even thought us that It's like, she's surprised we don't ask her anything

aleksi k: You're such a good parent. Thank you so much for these videos <3

Ava Keck: I wish my parents would understand this. As a child they were always telling me “use your brain” and “its common sense!” When i hadnt even been taught the things they were getting onto me for

Ali K: This gave me a flashback to when I was like 6yrs old sitting in my aunts car and my older cousin was singing every song on the radio, I said to her "how do you know all the words to all the songs!?" and I remember the feeling of how it made no sense to me that she knew them all

PuzzledGoober: Made me think of how my mom reminds me regularly that I had no idea she did the laundry. Up until I was like 6 I just assumed clothes reappeared in the drawers.. Because she would do all the cleaning at night while we were sleeping.

Kai Ju: It is so comforting to know that you would allow your daughter to cut her hair short. My mom always said that she doesn’t want her daughters to look like girls so I was never aloud to. When I turned 12 I really wanted to cut my hair short like really wanted to. So I asked my mom ands she said no. Well let’s just say that I did it anyways and she shaved my headlowkey I rate it an 8/10

CherrySunset🍒🌅: Ur parenting is really really inspiring. Yu have taught me quite a bit ❤

Sage Theis: You have no idea how much I wish you were my mother. I was expected how to know how to do things, then forced to do it, then i get yelled at cuz I “didn’t do it right, you should know better by now” like no every time I ask you to teach me, you keep telling me I already know when I don’t Currently learning how to clean as an adult now because of that, thanks mom, thanks Turns out Murphy’s soap can get black mold out of wood, that’s my latest lesson so far lol Edit: my mom is helping teach me now after seeing how I live without her in the household she finally understood she never taught me it’s okay mom I’m slow too lol

Raina Newman: Reminds me of when I was apparently small and threw a bunch of eggs on the floor, “to help let the birdies out.” And to a 2 year old, or however old I was, that makes sense. Birds come from eggs, right? So mom had to explain, birds come from eggs, yes, but not all eggs have birds in them. That’s a perfect example.

Kora Hiester: This heals my inner child, growing up I was told I should have known better, it got me thinking: DO I know better? It seemed like everything i did, "you know better" It got to the point (where I struggle with now) where I didn't think of myself as smart, I really thought that I was a dumb kid. I should know better, why don't I know better?

a loaf of bread: This reminds me of a memory I distinctly remember from when I was in preschool. I chewed on my finger and it looks jagged so I showed my class mate and coincidentally it was my middle finger. She told the teacher and I had to sit in the corner. The thing is,I didn't know what I did wrong because I didn't know its offensive. So I got punishment and learned nothing out of it

ellaphx: One of my biggest memories of my mum from my childhood is her making me feel stupid for not automatically knowing things.

Mathew White: My daughter was so scared to get her hair cut short as she thought it didn't grow back. After we had a good little chat and reminded her that i shave my hair all the time. She finally got it cut shoulder length and she loves it.

Elizabeth Ann: I apply this same concept at work. I tend to find myself training new people often. I do my best to show them what is now a simple thing to me but when I was new I did not know. I tell them to ask their dumb simple questions.

And Walcott: Omg...thank you all wise and knowing mother of children who gifted us this knowledge...

Delephene: I shaved my head a about 7 months ago and for a while I constantly got the question “when did you cut your hair?” by strangers and old acquaintances alike. I rotated between telling them when I shaved my head and being like “well I just got a haircut, you know, to keep it short”. People get so confused as to how my hair stays short, I have the same haircut as a lot of men and I get my hair cut about every 2 weeks.

Storm: This lady elaborated a statement over so simply which people complicate so much.

Stacey Hunt: I have had this exact scenario with my 3yr old MANY times recently. Her dad IMMEDIATELY gets very angry. And then I ask him "When have we ever had to tell her not to do that?!". Like when she was pulling her baby brother (Almost 2) by the back of the neck of his sleeping bag to slide him across the floor. They both thought it was brilliant. So I pulled her aside and explained if she does it, it might go against his neck and we can't breathe. That he won't be able to tell her that, because he is a baby and because no air means no noise. She immediately said sorry and never again did it. She also rubbed the cutting side of her safety knife back and forth on her outer wrist (Because apparently it felt funny when the bumps went across her skin). Again her dad freaked. But I gently explained that it's dangerous, and could leave her with some really bad cuts. She said "Oh. Ouch. Sorry." And I explained (As I did before) that it's okay. She didn't know and she won't be in trouble for things we never taught her yet.

Savana Moon: Common Sense isn't inherent it's learned and people need to understand that

Kat aaa: You. Are. Amazing. I remember being 3 and doing something that I probably thought was fine and being told 'thats against the rules' and thinking to myself 'have we...even gone over a set of rules????' it was very frustrating because when I would voice that it was back talking...

heaven: trying to teach myself this in my romantic relationship

glockbell: Yes! I hear that all the time, "You know better!" and I wonder if it's true. But childless adults aren't allowed to have opinions when parents are frustrated.

Destiny Alexander: I absolutely love how gentle she is

Jolly Rancher: There were so many times where I was made to feel dumb as a kid because I didn't know little things that are common sense for most people but not for little kids who don't know everything

Morgan: I still talk to my 16 year old about this. When I get frustrated because she doesn't meet my expectation I had for her I ask her if she knew about whatever I expected her to do. Sometimes she does sometimes she doesn't. Then we can talk about it

Regina Ramsey: I love that you think this way , I brought my kids up the same way ,they don't know better until they learn it

Jen: When I was three or four I asked my mom how parents choose their children's birthdays, and she laughed and explained that it is the day of your birth, and I thought to myself something along the lines of "of course that's why, I can't believe I didn't guess that"

Lunereclise12: Younger kids are so interesting its fun to have conversations with them just to see what will happen

Tris Hill: I use the phrase "You know better" when it's a rule constantly repeated, like "Don't run in the classroom" or "Don't throw toys" They know better, they just don't act like it

Nejire Hado: I don't remember where I heard this from, but kids are learning to be human from scratch, so we need to help them and teach them, not punish for stuff they don't know.

Blue Angel: This needed to be said. Thank you!

Cortlyne Hicke: THIS!!! I love you, you are totally one of my Mom Idols

Sagirah AKA EVILbunny22: This is a good way to look at it getting angry at your child when they constantly break the same rule you told them about can be a little frustrating but them breaking rules they didn't know exist are very interesting conversations it's like dudes who don't know much about the female body and you tell them things and they stare at you like you're crazy and you wonder how they made it to life but that's just the thing they'd have no reason to learn that if they aren't females You glance up the new everyday there's no reason to feel ashamed or be little others for not knowing

Lauren McGinnis: I love your thoughts about these things I love it. It's so true!

Kieran: this. when i was younger and i’d make mistakes, my mom would always berate me about how i had no common sense. turns out that was the autism not letting me understand social situations or implied instructions.

jasmine greene: Common sense isn't in everyone's garden! ❤

AlphaWolf Akita: Ya know, my 6 year old the other day made a inappropriate joke and when I asked her why she said that she had seen it on the internet. I had never explained to her that it was wrong. I try as a mother to be a good example for her. My wife and I had a sit down conversation with her that it’s inappropriate to say stuff like that. She felt bad afterwards and I realized that because I had shared with her that it was bad, she could understand why it was wrong.

Lemony Thicket: This is a much lighter version of the many examples I have of this, but when I was a kid it cracked me up when my mom would reference a movie or song that I hadn’t seen. She’d go “oh, have you seen such and such movie?” And I’d be like “who else would I be watching movies with, you haven’t shown me that one!”

Ajhausbs: I’ve always been told I lack common sense as a kid and even now as a teen. I have trouble with my memory for some reason so I don’t always rember if I’ve done something or not before and I tend to be impulsive but no one tells me anything then gets mad at me for not knowing. Like how can I do something on purpose if I didn’t even know what I was doing to begin with

Dana Ledbetter: That was very inspirational thank you for that

Day Ali: Me trying to explain this to my parents but I get grounded instead of understood lol

Lily Giles: Tbh your the most understanding mom that I’ve seen

Sleepy._.Sharky: wow you have got to be one of the best moms i’ve seen on the internet

BlurryNova: As adults we tend to forget that common sense isn't born, its taught, and kids aren't telepathic, so until you teach them as they age, they will not develop it, nor understand it.