Is The Curly Hair Community Toxic??? | Reaction Video

IndiaBatson: Thank you for reacting to my video “Couldn’t live up to the perfection” YESSSS couldn’t have said it better myself “curly hair hell “ loving this video sweet Brandi you look RADIANT in this video. Your skin is a DREAM always

Cyn Gordon: The curly hair gate keepers literally killed this community. It’s no longer fun and exciting anymore. PS. I’ve had the same routine with my hair for over 8 years now. I think the confusion comes from so many products getting released and floating around on social media

Curl Girl: I wish you gals didn't feel this way. You have taught us so much about caring for our hair and making it look the best we possibly can. My curl game has gone up because of you ladies and I understand it much better, but I never expect perfection. I know that is impossible. That is such an unrealistic expectation. I love when influencers are real with us. I can't believe there isn't support among the community. That is such an incredible shame. With everything in life, there is something to learn from others, take what you can use and you can just pass on the rest. You should have seen my imperfect hair in need of a wash day today - lol. I think I scared the delivery guy - Thanks to you gals I have more good days than bad - I am grateful for that. Peace.

Claudia L: Brandi what a fabulous video okay here's the essay with my thoughts! : I started following 'CGM' around 2017, quickly jumped onto the 'Deva Curl' bandwagon, and discovered very quickly that didn't work at all for me (lot's of hair loss). It took me another 2 years after that to realise my hair was better off by using some silicone products, by dry brushing before shower, and many other things that are 'wrong' in the community. It's 2020, and I'm happily rocking the curls my own way (with lockdown etc I had way more time on my hands) but by 2021, I was exhausted of it all. I'm basically completely over it, I often slick my hair in a bun, and I don't care! I straighten it sometimes, sometimes I wear it curly, I'm basically doing what you used to do prior to the method. I certainly feel like I don't fit in at all, my head of curls have 2B, 2C up to 3B in random places, hardly anyone talks about dealing with that! I still love watching both you and India, I hardly watch any others anymore but yes I couldn't live up to that expectation of perfection any longer. Too exhausting, life's too short. I use silicone products, parabens, I do all the 'wrong' things and I've never been happier. ❤️ Thank you for all your fabulous video content xx love from

Diana: I started giving myself a blowout about 2 to 3 times per month. My curly hair hasn’t suffered for it. I love watching curly videos for product ideas and I watch the videos where they blowout their hair. People nowadays love passing judgment- especially via the socials. Thanks for all that you do Brandi!

Bethany Barnthson: Oh man, there have been times that I have refered to it as the Curly Hair Cult because that is what it felt like. There are so many ways that the curly hair community is very toxic which is sad because the whole idea was embracing the hair you were born with. I was told I was a fraud for being a wavy and using a curling iron on the couple wonky pieces I always get. It's just hair. It should be fun and give you confidence no matter how you decide to style it.

Susan Zimnick: I think the arguments about curl types are the worst. I’ve had curly hair my whole life, and when I get haircuts, the stylists say my hair is very curly, but I’ve learned in the groups that it’s actually wavy. When I told the stylists that my hair is actually wavy, they just said it’s curly. There are just too many arguments about this stuff, and I think it causes over-thinking.

MEA: Brandi I’ve always been my own person. I use what works for me and don’t what doesn’t, whether it’s CGM or not. It’s a sad day when I hear you say you’ve decreased your curl content because of the people who criticize. I’ve been following you for years and give my patients your channel information because you ARE so very open about using different products and ‘just because it works for me doesn’t mean it will for you.’ I can’t imagine what it’s like in this day and age of being an ‘influencer’ and hearing over and over from toxic people who have nothing better to do than gripe. I for one LOVE you and your gigantic heart for all of us. P.S. I’ll be putting on a protein cream tonight on my low porosity hair that I learned from you

Krista B: Hi Brandi! I’m a fan of “you do you”! People need to relax. What works for one person may not work for another. I do follow different curly influencers but I use that to educate myself and am realistic that MY hair isn’t exactly like theirs. I for one love silicones. I clarify regularly so I don’t get an issue with build up. And as women we need to support each other. Your hair is gorgeous, but your soul that shines through is what matters. You’re just as beautiful when you’re doing a video with no makeup and a messy bun. And if someone with curly hair wants to rock a bun they shouldn’t be criticized for that. I agree that the CGM is too strict for me. But when I was starting out it definitely helped. But I realized quick that I need shampoo in my life and silicones aren’t the end of the world. I say you do you and be happy. Haters are always gonna hate - say a prayer for them and let it go.

Angie Joy: Thank you so much for this video, I totally agree with everything you both said. I really needed to see this to remind me that natural product free frizzy hair is beautiful too, I was lured into the CGM by the big beautiful perfect curls that I saw on social media and I've been so stressed out trying to achieve that level of perfection and never quite getting there, so I totally could relate when India said she loves her hair freshly washed and air dried without any products as I too loved my hair like that and I was happy, but I was convinced by social media that it wasn't ok to have any frizz and it must be "fixed". The only issue I ever had was some light frizz which caused minor tangles due to moisture loss towards the end of the day and apart from that my hair was healthy. I have thin but very curly hair that gets weighed down easily and I get product build up very quickly so I haven't been able to find the right combination of products to help gain the moisture to help keep the definition but not make my scalp oily. I have very sensitive skin and I never had any dandruff or acne until I started following the CGM and started using the recommended products and stopped washing my hair as often. I ended up with really bad dandruff and acne breakouts on my forehead that I just couldn't seem to fix. I've had to stop using all store bought curl products because it got way too expensive to keep buying them only to have a reaction and have to stop using it. So thank you for this and for giving me the confidence to rock my frizzy product free curls while I look for a more natural way to moisturize my hair that won't affect my skin.

Madison Gale Jessop: I will keep styling my hair curly but I have stopped following certain influencers because they got too toxic for me. And it got to the point that I felt bad after watching their videos. I just do my thing now ‍♀️

Rebecca Brock: I love how India is always honest about everything. Her hair, her skin, her family, her religion, her wins in life and her struggles too. She is human just like us and has let the world see that. I think you do a good job of that too! We all struggle in life and it is so much better to be part of the group working together to encourage each other, than the group making us feel like less than we are to make them feel better about themselves. Everyone has flaws whether they want to admit it or not.

Paula Broussard: The only way things change is by the influencers presenting a different version. If people don't see constant perfection, they won't continue to believe that's the only thing to aspire to. Present real versions and make that as "perfect". Just as Hollywood makes people aspire to perfect bodies, that same thing happens in all beauty-related areas. Go for it and be yourself.

Salt N Light: I just want to thank you for all your advice and videos! I 100% agree that we should be a COMMUNITY...share our experiences, and take away what works for each individual! I have three different curl patterns, I live in the VERY humid south, and what works for me is not going to work for someone else! My hair is sensitive to glycerin, if I get a good three or four days between wash days, I'm doing good! If anyone has perfect curls that behave 100% of the time , good for you! I am happy for you! However, anyone that has weird hair days, with frizz, fuzziness , poof, and weird kinks...I am happy for you too! Life is too short not to love everything that makes you fearfully and wonderfully YOU❤️

Kati Benzer: Thank you both for these videos. My curly hair journey has always been a struggle, I don't have perfect curls, and it's taken me a long time to accept that.

Amy Robertson: Thanks for your validation of everyday curls and imperfection. I watched a ton of CG content for about a year but at some point it just really got old...and I had started to trust myself. I think influencers present perfect hair because they want to look their best and I understand that. I've learned key things from various influencers so I appreciate that! I've learned a lot about low porosity fine curly hair from you, and I always detangle with a brush before washing so I lose a lot less hair. That was something I picked up in your video about a week of curly hair. Win win win!

ForeverDreamWithinADream: I am glad people are speaking up. So most of my life my hair was such a poufy frizzy mess as I would brush it dry as it isn't straight and didn't know hair to care for it properly (just told it didn't look as nice or pretty like all the other girls). I am trying to change that and while I have learned a lot, I feel those of us that don't have perfect and defined curls, we are often shamed or excluded. For some of us, it is a learning process or maybe we are more wavy/have looser curls. Finding what works for us, needing to manipulate our hair a bit to help give it more definition (my roots were flat but farther down, it starts to form a loose spiral pattern. It always held curls well and bounces, I just need to work on it more for it to look more uniform). I am trying everything-Denman brush, products, learning about scrunching and not towel dry, finger coiling and pin curls and even subliminals. I want to feel pretty and fit in somewhere. Also they are too strict. Since each hair is different, none of the products are one fits all (also why buy expensive products if you don't know how well it will work for your hair?). Mouse didn't really do as much for me as gel and some creams have, yet told to use products for me, mean to me means whatever works (lots of trial and error). My hair is thick/course which adds weight which is part of the problem. I cut it short recent to help fix some damage and it slowing starting to take shape and not look as bad. Still not straight without having to straighten it, so I don't know what people expect.

Diana Allen: LMAO been a curly girl my whole life too, now it's in Vogue and now I'm "doing it wrong " but they all embraced thirr curls cause the LOVE my hair lol. You ROCK Brandi thanks!!

Brooke McKeown: Yup!! I’m over it, I’ve been over it for about a year. I avoid glycerin because where I live is very humid - other than that if it makes my hair look good, I use it. If it doesn’t, I return it or give it to someone who may like it. It’s just hair. It grows back. It bounces back, WHO CARES.

Chanda: I am so glad the two of you made this video. My hair is 2b to 3a curls. It is not perfect. I am a wavey girl and not a curly girl. And I have found myself hating my own hair. I wanted to start my own channel on youtube about wavey hair. I even recorded videos but never uploaded them because of all of these exact comments. So now they sit in a vault. Thanks Girls! We as a community needed this!

Lillith Luna: I watched Indias video the other day. You both helped me so much! I never knew I had wavy hair. I stumbled upon it back in late 2017 and fell down the rabbit hole of cgm. I tried to do it but, it was so much. I have to brush my hair before I wash it or if never get it detangled. It’s down past my waist so yeah. I’ve found that silicones don’t cause any problems for me. I’m with you both in the thoughts about how the community should be. It should definitely be more inclusive and respectful. Thanks for sharing your thoughts.

Susan Johnson: Hi Brandi, I agree with you, thank you for such an inspiring video. Your hair always looks so beautiful, frizz and all! Indias hair looks gorgeous as well, especially brushed out. I love my own curly/unruly hair brush out too!!

Jennifer Leach: 2 of my favorite influencers!! And yes I definitely feel the same. ❤️❤️Hope you are having a wonderful day!

Sondra Stokes: Yes!! I quit the CGM about 10 months ago. I unfollowed a lot of curly girls, got out of my fb curly hair groups, unfollowed them on you tube. Am I happier without all of this? Yes…I felt FREE! I had myself on such a regimented schedule. All the CGM products, all the money I’ve spent, and I never got to the “perfect curly hair“. I do still use some of the methods I learned, but I wash my hair almost every day, and I love it. Frizz and all.

Edith Irizarry: You guys are amazing. Not two hairs are the same. I agree hair is hair and you should do whatever you want is your hair. Me I would change the color every month If I could lol. I love that you and India are just trying to help us by sharing your ideas and product experiences. Girls screw the haters I use whatever works.

Danae Dunning: Thank you for this. I am fortunate to belong to two Facebook curly hair groups that are very welcoming. They don't care if my hair is permed, or if I use sulphates and silicone, or that I absolutely will not give up my heat tools. I am also encouraged by channels like yours and India's. God Bless you.

Carolyn Cilento: Your video was a validation of what I've been doing over the years. And I am an older curly girl. I never mentioned to my other curly girl friends that yes I mixed it up. As for the expensive products yup I've sneaked it in... the cheaper drugstore products and have gotten good results, too. Taking out a mortgage to wash and condition my hair is a little daunting, but yes I do have expensive products too. I try not to follow too many rules regarding my hair. I have yet to get consecutive results for doing my hair the same way each time. I pretty much listen to me. Thanks for your heads up (no pun intended) on this topic.

Vanessa Smith: THANK YOU!! After watching a lot of different videos, I was noticing this too. How do they all have the same hair style/curls but apparently are different curl types?

Edith cieza: Thank you Brandi always love your videos because I feel you talk with your heart ,I think not all products works for everybody if I see an influencer with a new hair or make up product I buy it if I can afford and of course if it is a good one , Thank again for your videos Brandi you look beautiful as always take care and God bless you.

Angela Crowder: Happy Friday Brandi, I absolutely enjoyed your video! Thank you so much!! Have a beautiful weekend!!!

Sherry C: I completely relate to this video. Some days my curls look great, but most days I look like a frizz puff!! It's hit or miss.

Iness: I deleted my curly account from Instagram and I don't really miss it.It was fun in 2020 but I can't spend my life hyper focussing on hair.

Kris Shue: I've never understood why some people are so hung up on curl type. It doesn't define us and it's all beautiful. I've also been told that I don't have curly hair. I also do what works for my hair and I don't worry about the "rules". I color my hair and I like silicones and sulfates in my routine and my hair is healthy. Thank you both for calling out the toxic side of the curly hair community. I'm grateful for both of you and what you do for the curly community.

Amy D: I am 49, am somewhere between a 2b and 3a (depending on the day and part of my head it is) and have been on a natural texture journey since Wen came out (remember that??!!) so like early 2000’s. I never seemed to get thru that so-called “transition stage” because it seemed i could never get any mix of products or system down- so i been transitioning for 20 years!!!! Then, right when i finally kind of settled on a routine last year, i got pretty sick and then had a surgery, both if which made me not hardly eat for weeks. So, about 80% of all that hard work fell out. Now, about 6 mos later and my hair is growing in at a tight 3c! I am resembling a stunt double on the series “Candy.” so you can experiment and do some research here and there, but go easy on yourself and your poor hair! Thank you as always

Joelle Hall: I love that you, India, and a handful of other creators are putting this out there and talking about it. There's also several of you amazing creators on YouTube and Instagram that show realistic, day to day hair and endorse a variety of products and techniques, all while saying "Do what works for you!" That's what we need more of! I love seeing the "So, this is how my hair looks most days...but this is how it looks on the days where you take a lot of time and effort" and keeping it realistic. The curl boards and groups tend to scare me and turn me off the most, they are just a stable full of high horses. I understand how draining and not fun the curly community can be, but I hope wonderful people like you still stay involved to show the other side!

Carmen O: I totally agree! My hair is similar to India's, except less wavy. I'm at that awkward stage where I'm neither curly or straight. But, I have learned that my hair type allows me versatility to do what I want. It's not about rules, it's about loving yourself, and knowing what works best for you.

Andrea Foster: I wish some people would keep their bad comments to their self bc in the end no one is perfect and I love all the different ways to do my curly hair I have thick and course hair and sometimes it feels good to know their other that go thu the samethings I do so ladies please don’t stop the curly hair videos bc some of us need them

Jennifer Dyan: Yes preach it my queens! Love you both so much! You both have helped me so much with getting my hair healthy! I love my curls but I’m not so much on the crazy train anymore with the ingredients and stuff anymore. It’s not realistic for my life to even try too. I live in SW Arkansas the humidity is insane so hello frizz. I don’t love the frizz but I’m not going to run from it or try to over power it anymore! Life is too short to worry and stress so much over my hair! So thank you my loves for your amazingness whatever you choose do if you decide to do something different from your channels then no worries I’m not going anywhere! I’m not here just for my hair, I love who you are and what you stand for! ❤

meli Torres: Thanks...i have been loving the volume...the frizz...the brushed out look.. . I have been more chill about my curls....its summer going to more. Relaxed.

Cathy Lowe: Curls are never perfect and I agree that we all are beautiful and have our own individuality. God created us all with different talents, and thankfully He see’s us from the inside. I think we should embrace our inward beauty.

Beansngreens: Brandi, you and India are the only CG’s I’m subscribed to here on YT. Y’all embrace ALL aspects of your hair, and I personally appreciate it. I got off all other social media outlets 4 years ago, and at that time the “perfect curl” ideal was just starting to get amped up. I had been doing the CG method for a couple of years already, and that perfection was starting to get to me. I had to step back and realize these 2B/2C waves were NEVER going to be 3A/3B. Never. I had to stop and refocus on how to work with what I got and be happy with it. I won’t even address the whole “wavy hair isn’t curly hair” debacle. It’s petty. That being said…I do NOT use a co-wash (which is apparently a requirement in the CG world ). I also don’t use a leave-in every.single.time. Again, another big requirement. Refreshes? Nope, doesn’t work for me. I still straighten my hair. I color my hair. I sometimes wash my hair 2 or 3 days in a row. But these rules and others are what just totally turned me off from that community. “If you don’t follow the rules, you will fail. You aren’t in this community” was the message I was getting. I know I have spent well over $1K in the past 6 years, trying to get the right products to keep up with what influencers said I *had* to use. I’d had enough. I got 1 clarifying shampoo, a shampoo & conditioner for wash days, a moisturizing DC, a protein DC, 2 mousses, and then sat my butt down from prowling in the stores looking for something “better” or the “latest”. What I have works for me.

Maria Wendy Nielsen: I have tried and tried to achieve the big lush curls i had before I jumped on the method - still waiting for that great hair day... I'm currently in a Facebook group for danish CG method, I have never ever dared to post a picture of my hair - why? Well first off I have wavey hair, I colour my hair, and also when I finally have a great day it usually with products that have silicone or other stuff that's not accepted by the method. I also find that there is sort of an elitist mentality, where if you don't know everything you shouldn't really be posting. So in conclusion I am relieved that I'm not the only one. Much love to all and everyone silicone or not ❤️

Grace Burnette: The truth is that if you’re a curly girl then you probably have several different curl patterns on your head! I’ve actually restored my hair from damage following the curly girl method after reading the Curly Girl book by Lorraine Massey about 12 years ago! This was before Deva Curl was on the market and products were hard to come by and mostly made in the kitchen! I’m not sorry I went down that strict path because it did teach me quite a lot about my hair and how to care for it. I was the only curly girl in my family, so growing up was a constant struggle. I had massive tangles, ripped out hair from dry brushing, stupid bangs that didn’t lay down, tons of bun and braid days, and frizz! When I was almost 10 years old I slept over my best friend’s house and watched her older sister get ready for a date. They both had curly hair and I was just amazed at watching this girl do her “curly hair” routine with this new styler called mousse! (It was the 80’s) From that moment I took control and started styling my own hair. Now, I’ve relaxed my routine and I’m a little more forgiving when it comes to some of the taboo ingredients. It’s only because I’ve journeyed this road for the past 43 years and have finally figured out what actually works for me. I agree, everyone is different. I’m grateful to all the curly girl content creators because I’ve learned so much! Thank you!

Nancy Aloupis: Agree! The curly girl method is exhausting.

Bryan Britton: I have wavy curly hair like India Batson but it's down too past my tailbone and if wet detangle I get so much hair fall from breakage, I detangle my hair dry I have so much less breakage. I've wanted to post my hair so many times but I don't just because I know I'll get the mean comments "your hair isn't curly, wavy is just straight hair you try to force into a curl, the few spirals you have are just me forcing my hair that way, your hair is straight while wet" lala and it's like sweethearts I have hair to my derriere I only rake product in not sectioned and scrunch that's all, my hair already takes up time I don't have hours and hours I love my arms and back too much to be in pain all day. If it works for you lovely amazing I love watching the videos being like dang wish I had the patience but when this cgm curly girl community became bring each other down, making people feel bad about their curl type or say they are wrong about their curl type because one video their hair didn't look like it did on wash day I had to say peace and I loved when miss glam belle, India, Penny, and miss spisha days I actually learned how I do my hair from all of you not a certain hair type or just mine but everyone's. But it's a shame to see a community we loved turned into judging and belittling and making some girls not want to post their curls waves kinks n coils. Shaming girls for saying wavy curly, or kinky curly, I've even seen 4c girls feel like where do I fit. I wish it went back to before the scandals before cgm was a Bible I miss when it was a guideline like a starter kit.

Janet Jensen: Everyone who has curly hair knows that every day is different. Influencers please stop endorsing products! The best thing about these YouTube videos is that it’s unbiased, you guys have great ideas keep sharing them but don’t endorse the products!

erin: Disco queen lol

msadams224: I love India, but I had to unsubscribe to her because I think she is part of the problem, I hate to say it. I literally have no idea what products India actually likes because EVERY video she does is sponsored by one brand or another. It's so hard to know what's actually good because everyone is schilling one company or another every single video. What are the actual products they use when the camera is off? We'll never know because it doesn't pay the bills.

XOXO: First!