Femme Talks: Short Hair Don'T Care
- Posted on 05 September, 2013
- Short Hair
- By Anonymous
This video is a response to all the people out there who assume I chopped my hair off to "butch it up".
XXOO
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KEY WORDS: femme talks butch femmegasm hair lesbian gay community stereotypes pixie cut lgbtq rant short hair
Oh, my god, I had too much party okay, hi there lovely so right off the bat. I'M sure you can tell that. There'S a little something different about me. Yep ding, ding ding, it's higher! You know I wasn't going to make a big deal out of it. It was just my hair and just the name that I did because I wanted to, but since that I've got a little bit of skepticism from people and some negative feedback about my identity. So I just kind of wanted to set the record straight and clear up a few misconceptions about hair misconception. Number one short hair is butch and long hair is them. I don't know how many times I've seen a butch woman walking down the street with super long hair. Maybe it's even died or styled, or maybe it's just pulled back into a ponytail. It doesn't mean that she's not just as butch. If somebody who has like a flattop or you know some sort of shaved head or short hair, she can be just as much more more much depending on you know her energy and what she identifies as um. Now some of you saw my hair and thought that I was trying to butch it up. The reason I cut my hair was because I had never had my hair long like for very long. I'Ve never had my hair long very long. I always cut my hair off when I first cut my hair. I was like in first grade and ever since then I've grown it out, never past my shoulders and then I chopped it all off and also from the time I was 14 to the time. I was about 18, I hadn't had my hair longer than like past my ears, so this is the. This is the longest I've gone with having longer hair, and it feels really good to be back to short hair. I did not think it would be a big deal and I kind of expected some of you to wonder why I did it, but I didn't think that I would get any kind of negative reactions or that any of you questioned my feminine identity or my proud Status as a femme lesbian, I am in no way trying to look gay. If I do appear more gay, then I guess that's just a happy bonus. I was just downtown earlier today and I passed a bunch of lesbians. You know like butch lesbians, and none of them even really paid any mind to me, which why doesn't because they were busy, but I really haven't gotten any any sort of different reactions from people with my short hair. I get just as you know, passed off her straight and they don't bite just as many guys. In fact, I think I got like hit on by a couple guys today so misconception. Number two short hair means that your femme invisibility will be gone. Nope, I'm sorry. It does not work that way. If it does, I would be a happy camper because I had short hair most my life and it would be easy for me to just then be like okay, short, hair forever and ever. If people see me as a lesbian, short hair, it is that's not how it works. You can't just cut all your hair off and automatically expect people to think you're a lesbian. If your friend I haven't changed anything about myself, I mean I paid more attention to my hair now that it's short than what I did when it was long, what I'm trying to say is your femininity does not change when your hair changes, like I mentioned before There are plenty butch woman with extra line hair. There are just as many femme woman and straight women out there with pixie cuts who enjoy their hair and feel super feminine in confident and wonderful in it. You should not assume that somebody is a little bit more butch or assume that somebody is even gay because they have their short hair. Oh she's, a lesbian because she shaved half her head like no sorry, but alternative hair pads are becoming more mainstream, which is actually making it harder for us who are lesbians with alternative haircuts, but that's a totally different complaint and story and whatever. So. Thank you for watching this. I hope you guys liked my hair um. I really enjoyed it. I liked styling it I'm having fun with it and I feel a lot sexy and confident now that I've cut my hair so yeah. I guess if it's not your cup of tea, it's not your cup of tea and you don't have to like my hair or think that I mean it doesn't even really matter if you think that I'm feminist still, because I Know Who I am - and I would Continue with them gasm, because this channel means the world to me, and I still have a lot of femme invisibility issues and my hair is not changing me of that so subscribe subscribe. If you liked you liked this video leave me a comment below if you've ever gotten anything weird about the correlation between your sexuality or gender and your hair. I want to know once again thanks for watching ah brands going to do my makeup. Um, take my glasses off she's got something planned. I have no idea what she has planned and
Comments
Aashni: i feel and look so much more feminine with my pixie cut and i'm not gay either lol
Melissa Clagg: I'm straight and I just got a pixie cut. reason1: freedom from the constant ponytail and blowdryer. my hair was breaking and spliting from all the heat. reason 2: getting out of my comfort zone and showing myself that I don't need the "security blanket" to feel pretty and feminine. reason 3: my niece that is 8 had to get a pixie cut after a boy in her class cut a big chunk of her hair and she thought she was ugly because she didn't "look like a girl anymore". so we got haircuts together <3
Lisa Mckay: i've had my hair short for over a year now, and it makes me feel 10x more confident than when i was long, however i do get consistent comments saying that i must be a "lesbian" or want to be a boy, people are so ignorant, hair doesn't define someones sexuality
rat: I mean I am gay, but my girlfriend's family (they don't know we are together) just assumes that I am gay because of my short hair. It's really stupid. She even said that I liked a boy (a long time ago) and her aunt said I was just covering up the fact I'm gay...
Femmegasm: So glad you enjoyed the video! Presentation is a tricky thing. Definitely a love/hate relationship for me as well. XXOO
Sheeda78: Ur hair looks lovely :) nothing butch about it at all . And I agree short hair does not automatically mean butch . Lots of women with short hair look girly :)
Bluelady32 -: I had short hair when I was single and it was so hard dating. The men I liked didn't like it lol, so I grew it out. I was sick of being asked if I was gay there isn't anything wrong with that but I wasn't. Why do people want to assume something based on your hair? That's stupid to me I like your hair keep being you.
inverted introvert: Funny thing is, that cut accentuates your femininity i think. Some cuts do. Especially pixies.
rainbowsareGAYtastic: People acted the same way toward me when I cut my really long hair short, after having a shaved side and wanting to grow it out. Having short hair didn't/doesn't make me any less feminine. I'm still a heels, make up and dress kinda girl :)
NimbusDX: After having my hair very long for my whole life, I cut it short when I was 18. At that time, short hair on women was not popular like it is now. Now, lots of female celebrities and other fashionable women have short hair. But at that time, it was not the case. People treated me differently once I had short hair. People made comments about me that they never made when my hair was long. This has become less frequent as short hair has become more in fashion for women, but I still get treated strangely or get strange comments about my short hair even now.
stkc922: this reminds me the song "I am not my hair" by Indie Arie and P!nk. "Hair grows no matter what you do. Don't you wish that people did too?" Anyway, I love pixie cuts on girls, no matter what their sexuality :)
Kelsie Fukuhara: Well, tbh, I haven't gotten any negative comments about my pixie cut. People think it's cute. What I don't understand, is why anyone would assume you're a butch because of a pixie cut. It's YOUR hair. You can do whatever you want with it. Btw, I LOVE my pixie cut!
Anke happynow: You look absolutely stunning! A lot better than before. I got my hair cut last week again cos it was so annoying to have it in my face all the time (had an undercut before). Although I had short hair mostly, I still have to get used to it.
Samantha T.: Your hair looks great! It's very flattering and edgy! :)
Hope Kanehe: Preach it my short hair sister! You look fabulous!
Femmegasm: I definitely feel more like myself with short hair!! XO
vampireofsussex: I love the new hair! I've had mine past my shoulders for several years now and I really want to go short, but I feel like my face is too chubby to pull it off.
alycecorr: OMG THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR MAKING THIS! I completely understand what you mean!! When I cut my hair everyone was like "oh, so you feel you have cut your hair because you're gay, like some sort of gay statement" and I'm like "NOOOO I DIDN'T CUT MY HAIR BECAUSE I'M GAY, I DID IT BECAUSE I WANTED TO" It frustrates me so much peoples obsession with the length of hair in regard to sexual identity!
femmeinist: Love the hair! Wish I could pull off a pixie cut!
adrianna: after I changed (drastically) my haircut, like 5 years ago, everyone ask me if I'm lesbian. it's funny how people reacts to short hair. :D
Stephanie W.: I too have never kept long hair for very long, and I also feel more feminine with my pixie than any other length I've had.
Mariana Razo Bretón Mora: don't listen to negative comments.. your hair looks amazing!! your looks so cute and femenine and those earings rock your style!! seriously i'm considering cutting my hair short for the first time but i'm sure that my gf would freak out =D you're really becoming a role model with your attitude and confidence despite everything.. i love your channel!!
walkinghumandisaster: It's so gorgeous! I always want short hair, but my face is a bit too round. That has stopped me. And that's exactly the same with me. I only have my hair past shoulder now after eight years.
Amber L: I'm bisexual (yes, really bisexual hha) and I got a short hair cut too. it started out with my sidecut (which I already had forever) and the other side just passed my ear. but I wasn't happy with it. so I did a double sidecut, and now everybody is asking me if I'm a butch. and tbh, I just feel better and more confident with this hair cut. so this label-stuff really annoys me. btw, your hair is gorgeous, so is the rest of you. don't worry (:
Paige Rose: The shorter my hair gets, the more I get hit on by guys haha. I expected the opposite. hopefully it's just because I look good with short hair (:
LINDA @ MATURE SASS : I love your short hair! I've worn mine short for the majority of my life. I think it's very chic. Also, unrelated..... Where did you get your eyeglass frames? They are to die for!!! I'm looking for a replacement :)
Hannah Dob: From the perspective of a girl who is straight, I find it equally frustrating when people assume that my short hair says anything about my sexuality. At the end of the day, it's just hair. People tend to care a little more than they should about things that don't even concern them. Plus your hair is SUPER super super cute. I am in love with it. You are darling!
Alicia Jo: I have short hair because....I like short hair. It's less hot and less tangled and I like it. No identity crisis. I'm still hella feminine. It isn't about my sexuality (hetero) or my femininity. ITS JUST HAIR
Femmegasm: I think that's one of the reasons I like short hair, too. I don't feel like I'm hiding my face behind a curtain of hair. XX
Kelsey Thomas: your hair looks amazing and you look just as girly if not more, it frames your face so well and you look chic and stylish and beautiful!!
Madi: okay this short hair thing is soo dumb. when I see a girl with short hair the thought of them being gay NEVER crosses my mind!!! I really don't understand this. you look great with short hair and I'm planning on cutting mine off because why notXD
Emma H: Please, you look adorable. The new avatar is cute as well. Presentation seems to mean a lot to people, including myself, which I find both interesting and frustrating. I'm glad that you're happy with your hair and that you're not letting any oblivious commenters get to you. Anyway, I liked the video. :)
oyenic: Your hair looks AMAAAAZING <3
Femmegasm: Aww, that means so much to me! I am very very glad you're enjoying my channel! :) XOXO
Brenda Audrey Ciara: Short hair don't care!!!! Yes!!! So true!!!! Yeah ! Long live the short hair!!!
Femmegasm: I remember that video! It's so crazy that all women (gay and straight alike) get so much shit for just cutting their hair. >.< XXX
R R: When I have long hair -it accentuates the masculine stuff, so I think in an Oscar's dress I stand like I should be in a football strip. When my hair is short is accentuates the feminine, so even in boyish clothes playing football I look really girly. - I dontknow which I prefer as I wouldn't say I was butch or femme. I'm somewhere in the middle, sometimes I glam up. Sometimes I run around like a small boy.
Femmegasm: So true! Thank you so much for providing a different perspective! ^_^ XXX
jul: I showed my brother the pixie cut I wanted and he told me "everyone is going to call you a lesbian." and I was like "so..." and then he asked me "are you a lesbian?" and I said "no but why would I be offended, it's not an insult." and what he doesn't know is I'm pan.. but still my hair and my sexuality have no correlation.
Lisa TheCatDude: You look really cute, and are totally femme. You go with your femme short hair!! :)
justbeingbelle: AWESOME!! This reminds me of my video 'short hair douchbags beware!!' You rock it!
Nichole Ethier: You look soooo adorable!! Short hair femme sisters! :)
Femmegasm: I've got really chubby cheeks and a square face, if I can pull it off I'm SURE there's a pixie cut you could pull off too! XX
Laina: I agree completely regardless of your sexuality, how your hair looks/is/ whatever should not be associated with it.. Seriously do what you want. I thinking having short hair is liberating and fun!! Great Video btw thanks for the post .. Love Your hair too
Meldoesmakeup: LOVE the hair..such a cool cut
Melissa Honeysuckle: You look beautiful with short hair!
Femmegasm: I am so sorry about your experience! People can be very judgmental about hair, which is crazy because *they* don't have to live with it and it's on *our* head! So glad that you are more comfortable in your new 'do. Getting a haircut that you like can really boost your self esteem. :) XOXO
Yuvi Chauhan: im a guy and love short hair and on u it looks great!
Martina M.: I'm pan and I'm a girl with short hair. I have long nails, I paint them but I don't like make up (except for mascara). Ans everyone assume that I'm a guy or that I'm trans. So they ask me if I'm a girl. I don't wear skirts, but my name is Martina! I'm still a girl!
Wolfkins1972: ignore the negative you look great with short hair :o) not butch at all
Niktoria: I have a long pixie cut (cuz my hair grows fast so I just cut it whenever) is a mix of dark/pastle tomboy and I'm bi. I get mistaken for a transgender so many times, even by my grandmother this is because I have defind male looks - such as broad shoulders, adams apple (the lumpy thing boys have on their necks) height and big feet and hands, I dont have a problem with transgenders since I have a friend that one and I cheerish him very well. I also play in a lot of male sports teams in my school (e.g rugby) which earns respect of teachers and the boys that girls are independent(?) not because I wanna prove this but I want to have fun and yeah, but the girls (except my close friends of 4) always say "why aren't you like us?" 'ew, get away from me' "omg stop being such a boy" 'SHAME' "your looks are representing boys, broad shoulders, strong thighs, sharp eyes, characteristics, personality etc" I also have a partner is also a bi, he and my friends like and adore my features, but its hard for me to wear those those clothes ment for my gender because my shoulders are too wide, torso and legs are too long, so I wear some of the opposite genders clothes (which are cheaper sometimes) I don't get it, why don't girls hang out with others who are a little different than them? We're all just a different kind of special.
Anthony S: I personally think everyone looks better with really long hair regardless of gender identity but I don't get to stop people from cutting their hair
Dylan Darke: Quite the contrary! I think some of the most feminine girls/women I've ever met have had short hair. It's totally about energy, presentation, makeup, jewelry, clothing, accessories, body language, etc. etc. Plenty of guys & girls have really long hair and have very yang energy. That's me no matter how long or short my hair is. And you can still be a glamorous androgynous yet have more of a yin or yang energy. Your hair looks sexy, fabulous and confident - keep the look!
Missclippip: I think your hair is really pretty shorty it really suits you :)
jesstepes: people always assume that im a butch lesbian or that im a man im not a lesbian and im not butch im pansexual and im gender fluid and no i dont want to be a man. another thing i get is people trying to pressure me into growing my hair out long to look more attractive and girly because apparently only long hair on a girl is attractive the pressure is usually from Conservative people who view gender and beauty in black and white olded people or guys in general who are not into gender fluid or alternative girls
AshleesSketches: omg i LOVE your new haircut!!
wl3048: Looks great, especially with the glasses!!
MrGretzky9966: you look really good with it short
Femmegasm: Thank you so much, dearie!!! :)
Femmegasm: Aw, you never know until you try it!!!! Thank you! XO
Jenna S: It's absurd that younger women get all this hate and accusations of being gay because of pixie cuts while I've seen plenty of elders (who are heterosexual) and have pixie cuts that don't get any of these false accusations that younger women in society do if they have pixie cuts. I personally never cut my hair shorter than shoulder length, but that's really bullsh*t imo. People should be allowed to look the way they please without people constantly bothering them about it. Especially if you're a woman who loves short hair or the same also applies for a man with long hair.
Jenny Wren: You look girly to me. I love short hair iv just had my long hair cut. I love yours you look Fab.
Siena Gonzales: You should do a styling video also!
evi chris: I have a question.. I got my hair cut into a horrible "scene" hair cut and the hairdresser TOTALLY ruined it.. I want to get it really sort but, my mom is saying that I will look like a lesbian -.- I'm not... I just want it short! Can I have advice...? Anyone...? Thanksss!
Nicole Slater: Victoria Beckham has always had short hair, and she's straight, I don't understand why some people think the length of our hair is directly related to our sexuality. My aunt is gay and deff butch, her hair goes down to her butt! Lol hair is just hair and we all have a right to be comfortable with ourselves :-) Very happy that you're happy! Its a beautiful style and fits you perfectly!
Gina A: I love it!
Toe Bean Team: Um... I love your hair. SO foxy! You look cute, don't deal with any crap.
Shosh and Mer: I think it looks really pretty.
Kristina Rietveld: YAY!!! <3 PIXIE CUTS.:D
freshlimejuice: I just cut my hair short because I feel it looks better on me
Dafne Lopez: I love your hair, actually I've been thinking about getting a pixie, but in kinda scared that it would look bad on me or I wont like it, stuff like that....
Bryssa Dahl: love your earnings. short hair and glasses looks cute i wear glasses too
klou32: I have short hair because...my hair doesn't grow, nothin to do with sexuality!
De Bean: Hahaha! I love the bird whistling in the background :-)
Femmegasm: I completely agree. XXX
rageyb: Same style as my hair im not gay but like you say long or short doesn't make you gay or straight. You really suit it especially with your glasses.
runningtoastgirl77: you look so adorable:3
Femmegasm: Aw thanks! It's actually my mom's cockatiel, he doesn't really like anyone else haha
BunNessa_ Art: what face shape are you? I love your glasses!!! I couldn't stop staring at them haha! and i think you look fantastic with your pixie!
Corbin Matheson: girls or ladies with short hair are very confident, it is sexy and much better than pony tails....what is sexy about a pony tail or those stupid buns on top of your head.....get your hair cute be unique for a change hahha
Xinyi: You couldn't look any more femme if you tried :)
Lindsey Edwards: i love your hair
LauraD: long hair covers your face more short hair shows your face so then why is short hair more masculine? There is no chanche
Confusion is key: you're so gorgeous ugh
Femmegasm: I'm really enjoying it. ;) XO
Lisette Falcon: I like your hair ❤️
Femmegasm: Aw, thank you!!! ^_^
Femmegasm: Aw, thanks! <3
Femmegasm: Why thank you! XX
Ape Juice: Your nose piercing is making your nose start to get crooked and it distracts from your sexy nostrils, it draws a imbalance.
RetroBug42: My girlfriend doesn't want me to have short hair because she doesn't want me to be butch -_- we are both femme but she is too worried about appearances. I cut my hair anyway and I love it (still a femme :p). I hate stereotypes of any kind
Femmegasm: Your face is never too chubby for a pixie cut! I have a fairly large face (big German cheeks) and if anything, I find pixie cuts and other short hair cuts quite slimming. :) XXX
purbledream999: i feel better with shaved hair
Jenna Hatcher: Gorgeous
Femmegasm: You never know until you try it! ;) XXX
Bryssa Dahl: me i love short hair and I am straight.
MeTheBee: Amazing
Siena Gonzales: I love you and your hair but that whistling was so annoying
Bryssa Dahl: cutting my hair soon excited
Mary Sankey: I am thinking about getting a pixie cut any advice