Black Hair Roundtable

You'Re, not loving your soul when you have to sort of press, it burn it graded. There is a lack of acceptance of who you want your core and your physicality when you beat your hair under constant submission, but you talk about hair texture. You talk about stories, and here is such an emotional part of you know what you deal with as a woman. I was born in Ghana in West Africa and we came here me and my sister Tina eight years old waves and reasoner and I'm like oh yeah. Oh, my god, nothing. She was amazing and I'm like what could I read that? No that I admired, I think, she's beautiful this way, but but I couldn't do it. I was like I'm not having a little black boy that doesn't know his history. What it is it probably the best way for you to learn. Is that dress me just being kind of like a white education kind of system and then having dread? Allow me to make sure that I knew my history. You are was foundation so like we are pretty conservative, I would say when it comes to appearance, so my mom definitely missed me always always count. I was born in the Lower East Side with an artist pub. I was just raised by my mom foods, a white lady, so I didn't really have that, like you need to get your hair braided, look, you need to get a friend or whatever like she was just like you know, let it let it out her sister kind Of like a keepsake now, and if you question it, as I say it like she's beautiful hair, she never had to have it really relaxed. My mom is very fine, curly hair, but for me I was the one where we like was hair, so I never really knew what my hair type was honestly till I'm 30 years old, and I just figured it out now for me because I have a company. That'S based on some of the thought of selling extensions: it's not a marketing tool. I wear extensions and just started using my hair and self-expression because very long time like it was the way I dress. That Bible defines me in some way, because even all throughout high school, I had relaxed straight hair being able to touch my own hair or bring my own ear. That'S where I felt like my style started when I was little I wore skirts on my head, because I wanted long hair and my mom have a beautiful long, brown hair. That'S just what I wanted. That'S what I looked up to, but, as I grew up, I just love to having it out and it was. It was the only thing that really like connected me to it being an African American. I struggled with what beauty was for me, because what I was being told was that her, what I was unique, never was told you're beautiful just for as you are, when you get older and your hair grows out, then you're gon na be really beautiful. One day I had a best friend named Angelica, who had carrots for needs and like we would spend all day like all night like playing with her, bring her hair and she's like all see. But it's still like it's not bad, because I think your hair. I remember I was like 11. I remember that Emma's were going home after a little a day and being like, oh, like she's right, like my hair, isn't, but my hair isn't fun to play with my hair. Isn'T cool like if you okay? If I have, I definitely would be like okay, which one of us, or something and it's like, and but it's because of certain reactions that we get you our differences. So that's why we also do put into ourselves. So when I cut my hair and I made that decision for it for the health of my hair, I was like now - I have like short hair. What do I do because black hair doesn't grow by extensions and they have full head of just a long rifle afro there, but also you know, I don't have to take care of that. You'Ve never existed they're here for their technique. Now I think in the 90s. What was really interesting was that you know celebrity started to take the place of supermodels and the handful of black supermodels. It all had weeds, and that was what you saw. You saw a black woman. You saw her what the weave and they in the 90s - and I think what I think the shift really happened were black. What my started to investigate their dancer tensions, because they simply started to see different images of themselves. Different people, different establishments, different places, want different things. My mother at home doesn't want to see me in this. She was to see me in a black afro. A black Chevy call afro, that's the perception she wants out of the club, I'm here for three hours. I need a drink paid for what's the perception I need to get, but this transaction happen wouldn't mind like what won't care what blonde here. So you give every week that won't stay a complexion there you go like I, the men that I want to attract. I don't want to track them and get into this beat. You know if you're trying to get a job, you could be confident. I mean I consider myself confident, but I still want to get that job now. Getting that job. Is you know? How do I get in the door, then there's another question: you ask yourself: what's a good mentor, what do I do? I had an interview with a company that I definitely felt like there's no way they're gon na. Take me anyways what I do so I definitely put in the perm. Just like my hair back to my nose rings out. You know, and I mean I went in just kind of saying you know I'm not my hair. You know I can slip it back and still know why I'm doing this and the interviewer is asking me like who else are looking at to know anything. I told her what was coming out so and she still saw that edge in me. So then, if that's the case, then why did we still feel we need to change our hair texture when we were trying to sell our skills? But that is our experience, I think maybe the most renegade thing I've done so far as negotiating between those worlds of expression is, I wasn't enough friends to be at Conde, Nast. You know they called me in and when they called me, I was wondering who they thought they were getting. I was like googled me cuz, my eyeballs blue have red spandex, I'm gon na come with a loose Peggy Hill, but still I can go. This few have sold a few close ones who really know what Samuel a games. I told me you know they've called me in. I had this introduced to this senior senior level HR person and they were like girl. What'S your hair gon na get because at that time I had a blonde hi Tom, even I'm, seven Queens Jones cut and I was like you know what I don't know, because I want to get this effect cuz. I could easily pop one on and give you that beat and give you that Chloe bag - and you know, give you a look, but damn I don't want to lie to them because probably next week to sort of be real, you know. Maybe this is my relationship with a real man and not like a boyfriend, not your x-men and not your strange husband. Maybe I could just be Who I am, and so you know what everything else about me was conservative. My eyebrows were blue or black. I wore pumps, but I have my afro and, to be honest, like I never got a call back just my favorite stories. I was on the subway and I get on the train and this black lady comes up to manager. You mixed yes, okay, all right, because my hair was just the way it was, and I remember getting like a lot of hate for having it natural. But now it's like a style. It'S trendy, some like today, walking done this year. I got about 10. Compliments. I think when I had my head shaved, I definitely got you know an exotic more of a response. It wasn't like he was like oh you're, too full. So it's like. Oh my gosh. No, I think I've just in my life off earth towards all of this stuff, that's being a non-issue because here's what it is to feel uncomfortable to be that hyper aware and that sensitive about your skin, your body in here is uncomfortable and, after a point, it's Counterproductive to whatever life goals you might have generally like, I can't be fussed and press over, oh, my god, I'm so dumb. I don't think, and I think ultimately, what that is, is the African woman in me because when you're like we don't have your papers. You know you got to pull things together. You got ta figure out a way to get through high school forever to get to college. All these to me, it's like they're, an American issue. That is not something you value, but it's not to say it's not valid, but they're, very American, because, as the oldest daughter like I feel like see what sort of I don't know if, like you, do a little bit sheltered because for me well, I identify what It really is just pure and simply struggle, that's it like how when's my mom coming home, because I'm I'm watching you my mom's working the weekend like you know, and how do we tie like you say so, it's like all this is cool. I get it. I just think that, as an African woman cook in America, it's just very different. I like the fact that the change like the ability to change your look can a chameleon thing is just kind of like this. Is this something so empowering like that when you were kind of like a powder I would be like yo like I can change my look. I can put my whole week in a hat or like you know, but I like it this way or like tomorrow. It could be this way I like to change people's opinion about me through the way in which I look and then be able to let you know that I'm Way smarter than you, even though I have a pair Christopher, yellow sands, blazing