Reader Question: Maybe It’s Because I’m Pure African That My Hair Doesn

Reader Question:

Hi, my name is Mellissa and I am from Africa. I really need help take better care of my hair. I am 19 years of age. I moved to the States a couple of years ago and before coming here I had natural hair my whole life until I relaxed it when I started attending school here.

Since then I have been having trouble growing my hair out, I mean my hair grows and it becomes very, very thick but short. For some reason my hair cannot grow long.

Whenever I relax my hair the ends of my hair get extremely weak so my hair dresser has to cut most of my hair off and it becomes short and thick again. I cannot even make a ponytail out of it.

Sometimes all my hair becomes very weak and when I comb it out it sheds a lot. I really do not know what am doing wrong because I wash my hair every week and blow dry it.

I was wondering, is it the amount of heat I use on my hair because I heard that too much heat on the hair damages it. Frankly I do not know any other way to dry my hair because whenever I air dry it it looks and feels extremely dry.

Or is it because I am pure African, is that why i cannot grow my hair out? I really don’t know what am doing wrong that’s why I really need your help. I love my hair and I don’t want to destroy it any more than I already have. I really want healthy hair can you please, please, please help me.

Our Answer:

I’m sorry to hear about your hair troubles Mellissa. It sounds a lot like your hair is over processed. Many ladies assume that just because their hair is thick, it is also strong so can take rough handling which is totally inaccurate. Don’t worry though, there is definitely hope but it’s not going to be easy or quick.

Many relaxers give a 20 minute window in which to apply it and while it may be accurate for an average black women, we are not all the same and 20 minutes may be way too much for some. In my case, I found out that a mild texturizer applied for 5 minutes more or less did the same thing as a relaxer!

Now considering that I thought that my hair was resistant and I used super relaxers in the past applied for about half an hour, you can imagine how damaged my hair was even though it appeared thick when air dried, it was extremely damaged. Relaxing bone straight may not be the best thing for your hair and more often than not, does not work because hair will usually be left with a bit of curl anyway!

Now I’m not saying that you have to go natural like I did but you may want to rethink your relaxing routine. Make sure that you are stretching your relaxers to at least once every 12 weeks and not 6 weeks like most stylists suggest. This way you are leaving little room for error in terms of overlapping your relaxer.

You may also want to consider texlaxing instead of relaxing (Read this article for more information about texlaxing: https://blackhairinformation.com/relaxed-hair/relaxing-texturizing-and-texlaxing-black-hair/).

This way you preserve much of your natural hair’s strength while being able to wear it straight easily by roller setting or flat ironing. It would be wise to learn to look after your own hair because not many stylists will be in a position to offer the texlaxing process.

It is also important to consider starting a deep conditioning regimen with an emphasis on protein to help your hair regain some strength. Remember to also alternate with moisturizing conditioners and moisturize daily with a good quality leave in conditioner*.

Unfortunately may also have to accept that if your hair is in fact over processed now, you will be starting from scratch and all you can do at the moment is to keep the hair your have on your head long enough to allow healthier hair to grow. You can trim the damaged hair little by little until you are left with the healthier well looked after hair. After that, you can start aiming for length goals.

I tended to favor moisturizers with glycerine listed in the first few ingredients when I was relaxed so you may want to try those yourself. The ones that fit the bill perfectly are the ones made for curly perms like wave nouveau or S curl. Don’t worry, it won’t give your hair the ‘wet look’ but glycerine* attracts moisture from the atmosphere and which will keep hair soft all day.

Please note that glycerine* containing products tend to work best if you live in a relatively humid environment. If it is dry, either summer or winter, then please opt for one without glycerine. Giovanni direct leave in is excellent.

Trust me, being pure African does not affect how long your hair grows, only your regimen and how you handle your hair will be the determining factors.

Without knowing your hair regimen I can only give you so much advice but I would encourage you to watch hair care videos on our site or youtube. Start a fresh with your hair journey by visiting this link: https://blackhairinformation.com/all-you-will-ever-need-to-know-to-grow-black-hair-long-and-healthy/.

I wish you the best of luck and hope that all my advice at least gives you a starting point on your new hair care journey.