How To Know If You Have An Obsession with Camera-Ready Hair, Perfect Hair

We all want to look good. We want to be beautiful and appreciated along with being treated fairly and respected. Don’t knock it, just understand it and don’t discount it as being trivial. I want to be valued for my mind, but I’m sorry, I also want to make sure I feel good about my appearance when I’m out in the world and part of my appearance is my hair.

As we curly girls fight for the right to wear our tresses anyway we see fit. There are some of us (OK, a lot of us) stuck on having picture perfect hair all day every day. Picture perfect hair does not just happen. Sorry, but you don’t wake up with your coils, kinks or curls flawlessly defined without a hint of frizz. That takes work and time and product. Let’s face it, a bad hair day can alter your mood if you let it and one unkind word or glance can make you want to hide your entire head in the sand.

Taking pride in your appearance is noble. Making your hair camera-ready every single day is exhausting and setting the tone for your hair to ‘perform’ on a daily basis is setting yourself up for failure. Perfect hair isn’t possible and yet we try and obtain it and for whose benefit? I know we dress up, fix ourselves up for ourselves as well as others and although other body parts can take the daily pounding can our tresses?

Wash day is expected to be one of the longest hair’s requirements and when you couple that with the chore of detangling it can be an all-day event. It is a necessary component of your hair’s maintenance and even if it involves over-manipulation to your tresses. It’s not an everyday routine, so you manage and get through it. The problem with desiring picture perfect hair is that it can require daily over-manipulation that is unnecessary, time-consuming and counter productive.

There is no steadfast rule on what is considered over-manipulation because one woman can re-twist her hair every night and have no problem, but another can do it and see breakage that they never had before. Damage is determined by you and your hair needs, and when you see the warning signs like breakage, thinning or split ends, you must take heed. Your hair is telling you something that needs to be heard, ignoring the signs will lead to compromises of your hair’s health over a style. It’s not worth it!

There are a few signs that can indicate that you might be going down the road of over-maniplation with the goal of perfect kinks and curls. If you need some examples check these out below:

Retwisting every night to have the perfect curls or coils – Do you really need to retwist every night? Can you honestly put off a night or two and let it be bigger or less defined for the sake of your hair?

If you just cannot stand the lack of definition then retwist every other day and on those days you do not retwist, throw on a scarf, headband* or cute beanie. I promise your hair will thank you for the break.

Using tons of product to have smooth edges day in and day out – OK, enough with accentuating baby hair, and as a matter of fact…no grown woman even HAS baby hairs!

All you are doing is putting too much stress on your edges, and if you are constantly using a gel and brush to make them super smooth, you are going to notice thinning if you never give it a break. No one says you need slicked down hair to be beautiful.

Wetting your hair every-day for perfect coils, curls and waves – *raises hand with head bowed*. This is me and I cannot deny it. I get up every morning for work and jump in the shower and rewet my hair. Is that even necessary?

I have been opting for going a few days in between and letting my frizz fly to enormous amounts and I actually like it. I’ll spritz it a little in the morning with my spray bottle concoction if needed. Pineappling, wearing a loose scarf, or a satin pillowcase* can salvage your style and allow you to rock bigger and better Wash and Go hair, if you are willing to part with curl definition.

Changing your hair several times a day so it looks impeccable – Stop the primping and the prepping throughout the day. All that extra manipulation is unnecessary, as well looks a tad bit haggard at the end of the day.

Heck, if you look too good, your boss might think you aren’t working hard enough! let your hair be. If it grows into a frizz ball, make the habit of bringing a headband* or other accessories to quickly change your style, without having to pull out the spray bottle, gel, wide tooth comb*, and turn your work bathroom into a salon.

As it begins to sink in, remember that you are far from alone and not a failure by any stretch of the imagination. This is just a bump in the road to loving and nurturing your hair. Relax your rigid routines, if you find yourself in your hair more than you need to be, and look for the signs of over-manipulation to your edges, nape, and all over really. Give your hair and your mind a break and just let your hair ‘be’. Your tresses will thank you for it!