Going Gray In Secret Part 3: Going Gray With Wigs!

( upbeat music, ) Hi, it's Katie from Katie Goes Platinum. And I'm here today with Tarla. And we met in Silver Revolution. The Facebook groups that I admin for going gray. And Tarla mentioned in passing that she used wigs to help her transition to gray hair., And so I want to ask her all about that.. So that's why we're here today. So- [ Tarla, ] Hello-. Thank you for being with us. ( Katie chuckles ), So your hair is gorgeous by the way I love the color. And it's thick. [ Tarla ] Thank you. Thank you. Gosh. It feels like it's been throughout the years and it's so funny'cause, I'm jealous of like your color.'Cause. I like the more silver silvery and mine, has that kind of champagne tote, but we kind of get what we get and so that's what makes gray hair unique.. If you don't mind telling us, how old were you when you decided that you were gon na (, Tarla laughs ) get rid of the hair dye, You don't have to tell us if you want to. And then what made you decide and then how did you Go about it Well, I'll! Just tell you, I'm in my forties., So we'll go there. But like when I was literally five. I already had silver strands of my hair.. I mean when I was a little child and then at 19 they started coming in.. So what happened was like like many women I wanted to always you know dye. My hair. Everyone, you know was like ,'', Oh, don't go gray'', It's gon na make. You look old.'' All that stuff and they never had any intention like. I would never have guessed that I'd be sitting here talking to you about this situation., But what happened is is that you know, as you can see my hair's so light, and I was naturally dark. Brunette, almost black., And so I dyed my hair black and as soon as the as soon as the gray would come in. It was like white against black. And it was so noticeable and it went from dyeing every four weeks to every three weeks and two weeks. And literally I was dyeing every Saturday myself.. I was doing my roots. And I think my body just reacted to the toxicity of the dye to be really honest.. I started having rashes come up my legs, like one time when I was dyeing my hair, which scared the hell out of me. Another time. I literally broke out in head to toe hives., So that was the beginning.. I think that was your question. That is why I decided to go gray. Because I just felt like I'm, not gon na risk my life and have my throat close, obviously just so that I can be dhaine and have you know, dark hair color., Even though that was initially my preference. Yeah. I think that's smart, that you listened to your body like when I look back and then I started having reactions to the dye. Probably two years before I decided to stop dyeing. And I would I went to the salon for the most part. Sometimes I dyed it at home, but wherever I dyed it, I would start itching really badly like right here and it got to the point where it was almost unbearable.. Did you ever find out what in the dye you were allergic to or do you just did you just decided just to stop. Yeah, I'm assuming it's PPD, that's the toxin that creates color.. So a little story with that is that you know I was dyeing dark right And then I did a lot of research and in my research is, which is how I first came across to you before. Even seeing you in that group. - And I found out that blonde dye has the least amount of PPD. - That's the toxin that creates the color., So it wasn't removed, but I thought `` Well''. You know, I don't know for a fact. I just know I'm allergic to something and I thought `` Well. Let me try that.'' And same thing as you. I was able to do that. Maybe for about a year'cause I said `` Well at least I'm not gray ,'', you know., And I did that for about a year and then same thing that you know it was the itching and I've seen a lot of women. Have that reaction.. They think they're. Just itching. It's an allergic reaction. And then, by the end of that it was like, like kind of last, the two appointments I had like I had been fine and then it started having this burning itching.. So I stopped that. And actually the next step is. I even tried Henna., I tried Henna and then to go brown. Henna'S Orange. You have to use Indigo.. I became allergic to Indigo., Oh my God, [ Tarla ]. So I'm literally like all out of options here.. So I started itching with that too. Indigo has mold scores in it., And a lot of people are allergic to mold., So I literally had no choice.. So it's like I had to be gray unless I wan na, like you, know, be on Benadryl every day and risk my life.. So obviously, I'm not gon na do that.. I think it's so smart that you listened to that and just stopped when it became obvious that you just couldn't, do it anymore. And it's hard I mean when I look back, I could have gone gray, probably (, indistinct ), my mid thirties. I probably was pretty gray that I did it till I was almost 50. And now, when I look back - and I see all these other women in their thirties and forties going gray., I wish I had, but at the time nobody else was doing it. So I didn't feel like I could you know, which is annoying to me, that I even thought that, but that's just you know we all go through those phases., But I think I think your hair looks beautiful and healthy. So- [ Tarla ] Thank you., [ Katie ], So how long did it take you to to achieve this level of gray? Like you know, did you tell us how you grow out your dye or are you you know? How did that go? You said that you went cold turkey right. I went cold turkey about I'm gon na say it was it's been about two years, probably about a year and a half is when it was fully gray by chopping off all the dark ends.. So so I'm an online marketer. And I have to do. Facebook live videos, frequently. And I personally didn't feel comfortable having that demarcation line, I think, is so women can get away with it more. I mean anyone can do what they want, but I mean it's easier. I think for some women ,'cause, I feel like there's not a much of a difference between the color of their gray and their hair., But when you have black hair and you have light growth like this - it's very very obvious. There was no way for me to really masquerade it. And I honestly kind of I hate to say it, but I felt like embarrassed because I thought well ``. How am I gon na like go on there'' And feel professional, and my hair is like'' Two different colors.'', Even though I totally love that women do that? It'S just for me personally, like I didn't, feel comfortable., And so I don't know where I got this idea, but I think I was just researching like ,''. Oh my God, how can I fix this situation? ?''? It probably was off of YouTube, somewhere. And just said ``, I'm just gon na get a wig.'', And I was never somebody who wanted to like wear wigs or thought you know. I know like it's very popular now with like people like Kylie Jenner and, like you know, all these celebrities are wearing wigs and they've made it cool thankfully. And a lot of the fashion runways have made gray cool also., But so I went to a Wig Shop In Hollywood and I went - and I I was looking for wigs and I just felt really uncomfortable even trying on the wigs. I didn't feel like I thought''. Oh, my God, this is going to look like a wig.''. People are gon na know, I'm wearing a wig.'' And the whole idea behind this was that I would have you know long dark hair. And I was trying to do a wig that looked just like my hair.. So basically nobody would know.. It wasn't a different color. Wig it was like my hair would look maybe a little thicker, but maybe they would think I had extensions that they wouldn't really know what happened. And I ( sighs ). Oh my gosh, I spent $ 2,000 on my first wig., So it was a huge investment but and it's real hair. There's different levels of wigs. I think they go up to like. I think Eastern European is supposed to be known as the nicest hair. And I think those are like four or $ 5,000 wigs 3000.. The one I got, I believe, was Indian hair. Maybe it's you know really pretty and I felt confident.. So I felt like more confident honestly than with my own hair.'Cause. You know we all have like. I feel today Bad Hair Days and I was like ``. Oh great'' I'll never have a bad hair day.'' And it kind of started like that. And then I started getting more wigs with different colors.. So people would know ,'', Oh she's, wearing a wig'' when my hair is pink., But I thought `` Well, maybe now'' They'll not think my other one's a wig'', But they won't know.''. I just it was kind of like my own little kind of funny secret that, like nobody knew except my real friends offline., I think that's a great idea. It'S also fun.. You know, like some women, don't like makeup, but like I've always liked makeup, because I feel like it's kind of fun, to make yourself look completely different. You know [ Tarla, ], Yeah., [, Katie, ] And ( stutters ), and I always felt like for most guys. You know they don't feel comfortable doing that., They don't have the outlets to make themselves look completely different, like we do. You know, and so I think wigs had never even occurred to me to to try wigs.. So I think that's so cool. And do you mind mentioning which wig shop you went to in Hollywood? I think it's called the Wig Shop actually.. I haven't been there in a long time.. I actually haven't been there due to COVID, because I wan na bring my wig in to get washed. So they'll, basically also wash the wig for you and they'll style it with a flat iron, because the hair and the wigs like ( indistinct, ) I'll, show you. I have some synthetic ones that are really cheap. I have - and I know where I bought those, so I can tell everyone your audience. With the more expensive wig. I'M scared to wash that or touch that one, because obviously it was an investment., So they need to wash it for me. and I think it's I forget what I pay about $ 60 or something and you bring it in and they'll wash it and they'll flat Iron, it and style it for you and they'll cut it whatever in the center off to the side. However, you want it., But I have to go in and I you know I haven't'cause a COVID., So I was like. ( chuckles, ) Yeah and I don't wear them often.. You only need to wash a wig about once, like every 30 times that you wear it. So it's not like normal hair, you don't wash it frequently to damage it. And I don't wear mine. Often, I would basically wear them pretty much just to go, live or if it was like Christmas, when I was going to someone's house for an event., But I don't wear them around town like to go to the grocery store.. Now now that you're fully gray, do you wear? Would you wear them just for fun? You know just just to change things up still Yeah, I think. Well, maybe we can talk about this too, but I think for me, an area that really ( throat clearing ) intimidates me is kind of dating. Yeah. [ Tarla ] With gray hair., Because I don't have a boyfriend now and you know I'm like, but I want People to know I'm gray, but then I'm like ``, Oh it's just kinda that like'', you know what I mean, And so I feel really confident in wigs. I'M still developing the confidence with the gray hair. Like I feel pretty confident, but it's mostly like styling.. The fact that and again maybe that's something we could talk about, but it's difficult for me, at least to style, gray, hair because of the heat tools and not being able to use them as much.. And so I have a confidence in being able to use the Curling Wands and the Flat Irons and just to really like make your hair look the way you want it to. And then I'm also trying to figure out another thing to kind of point out to People, I think, is that when your hair's gray, you might like it looking different than when you had your other your dyed hair.. So, for me, with the dark hair, I prefer to always straighten it with some curl sometimes and the beachy waves., But I feel like I'd might all those I prefer some wave in my hair when it's gray versus straight. Because of the color. Like it's more of A champagne tope, I don't know it's not that silvery silver that I love.. So it's also just trying to figure things out, I'm still in the discovery phase. I'M not. This is not my perfect phase yet, but we're getting there.. My only frustration, but I think like if I can't style my hair, you know I wear it up a lot in a bun like when I'm out, and I just don't want that grandma look., So I'm like. ``. I hope it doesn't look like grandma look.'', But I do that and then, if I really just feel like I'm not feeling confident about my hair, I have my waves to turn to.. So that's always nice.. I brought the more fun ones. I mean well, this is the one that's the most fun.. Let me I just took them in. They come in a like a shoe box like this. This is just one of the cheaper ones. It'S synthetic I'm just trying to make it look nice., It's kind of hard to show.. So it's a pink wig. I don't know if you could see, there's dark roots and it's short.. So it's straight., So it's kind of probably hot hard to tell without it being on me.. But this is what it looks like. I hope that's giving you a good idea., [, Katie, ], Yeah. And yeah. I mean you know. This is probably one of my favorite wigs. It has all these kinds of closures in it. So the way that if people aren't familiar with a wig, you know the way it works is it has little clips. So it kind of clips into your hair and it's got some kind of like tightening little elastics in the back, so that it would really stay on your head.. So this one's not looking so good on the inside. It'S taken some abuse.'Cause, it's my favorite wig. So I actually need to order another one. And it's from UniWigs., Because people wan na know U-N-I Wigs, yeah. Yeah. That'S a beautiful, color. Wow.. What I like about this is, it looks really natural'cause of the roots.. So it looks like it really is my roots and then I just yeah did pink on the ends.. I love that- [ Tarla ]. I liked the-, I like the .... I love the length of it because it's longer in the front and it's kind of a little bit shorter in the back.. It'S just it's really. It'S just really pretty.! It'S my favorite one of my favorite wigs. These wigs run anywhere from like $ 80 to like about $ 130 and they're synthetics, so they're really affordable.. You know for anybody to buy and pick up.. If you just kind of want, you know a fun change.. One thing I find interesting is when we first talked to you about you using wigs. I think I was thinking something crazy, which is, I thought that you were doing what some women do, which is their hair is going gray., So they let's say this part of their hair - doesn't match their ponytail like their ponytail's black, but this is gray., So sometimes They'Ll tuck their ponytail in under gray. What do you call it These hair pieces.? You know what I mean: [ Tarla ], Yeah yeah.. When I got a super blonde, platinum, ponytail, and then I was going to use kind of like toners ,'cause. I felt like ,''. Okay, I'm pretty safe with a toner to not dye ,'', To tone it to kind of make it more of a gray, ashy color.'', And I just found that those ponytails for me - I'm not in I'm great with a Curling Wand and a Flat Iron. But I'm not a girl who could make my hair look amazing, like I'm more of a makeup person., So I found them really hard to first of all, they're very heavy., They're kind of like the kind that I bought was like a Brittany Spears longer one that I think I've seen influencers get. They're, very heavy. They give you they were giving me headaches. And they're hard to kind of maneuver with your hair underneath. I just found like a wig, is so much easier. You literally throw it on your head. You'Re done. So- [ Katie ]. So now what about? I always worry that if I had a wig I would get hot.. Do you get hot with them or not too bad. ( Tarla, chuckles ). It'S just funny. You said that, because you know, I've watch all those Real Housewives and I think, like The Real Housewives of Atlanta, like it's so hot over there, I'm like''. How are these women wearing wigs in the summer? ?''? I don't even understand., I have to say: wigs are amazing for the winter. They're like ``. Oh it's like so warm.'' And you know it's cold outside and you have that extra heat. But in the summer yeah. They're not they're hot for sure., And I don't like the feeling of kind of sweating underneath.. I always wear like. I don't think I have one here, but you wear like a nylon stocking., Like you know, over your hair, you put your hair and a little. You know section it up and put little pony tails and pin it in the back. People. Do it different ways you put this nylon and then you put a wig over. And so yeah they can be warm.. I feel like the more expensive ones are not as warm and the cheaper ones are warmer. That makes sense. Probably'Cause, especially synthetic hair is probably a lot heavier than the real hair.. Then, what about in terms of headaches when you were mentioning like''? Sometimes, if I wear a bobby pins like up here'', It really gives me a headache.''. Did you get headaches from wearing the wigs? Even when it wasn't hot out, You know not from that, but I remember (, sighs ). Oh my gosh.. I can't even believe I'm telling you this., But when I was driving home when I first got the wig from that Wig, I think it's called The Wig Shop., I'm pretty sure I'll get you the name. And I was driving home and it was like not properly Fitted on my head. And it was like too tight or something or too loose, it was falling off.. It was so crazy. I had to just turn around and go back to them.. They made it so the one that I got, I think it was it was on the tighter side., It's a little bit more petite. And I don't know if I couldn't maybe let they fit me. Now, I'm thinking, maybe it could have been a size up because It'S tight, it's tighter than my synthetic ones., So that sometimes I feel like. Overall I can get a headache.. I mean what is the same Duties, Pain, (, both laughing ), [, Katie, ], Yeah., [, Tarla, ] Yeah.. How many wigs did you end up? Buying total? I'M just curious. Yeah I'll have to count them. I have so. I have a gray one. By the way I bought a long gray, one kind of like your color a little bit lighter.'Cause. I think I figured I'll just try this gray lookout early. So and I have a blonde one which I have here.. I have pink gosh. A lavender one., Like my own hair color, trying to think what else do I have. I feel like. Oh and I have another blonde one with dark roots. So what is that it's at least six, maybe seven. ( indistinct )? Are they all straight or did they get any curly ones or you know how? How different are they from each others? Well, you know. I went by the color of the hair mostly, but I find a lot of these synthetic wigs have if they're longer there'll be long and they'll have all these curls at the bottom, and I feel like they look like wigs. They look being more fake. And so because no one has this voluminous hair and then, with all these beautiful curls at the bottom, most people would have., And so I felt like the pink one that I just showed. You looks more, that's the look I prefer, but I just buy. What'S there. So they don't all have like a lot of straight wigs, but I find when they're straight, like that they look more real. Like I feel like when there's all these curls and stuff I'll kind of show you this blonde one., I mean it's probably gon Na look white to you., I figured why not be Platinum Blonde. If I can gather this and this one was so long and I cut it., So it just cause, I cut it to make it look like more of a shorter platinum blonde.. So it's this one I'll hold it back: here. [, Katie, ], Yeah., (, indistinct, ), [, Tarla, ] Yeah, and it was super long curly and I just felt it looked fake. So I don't even know if my job on cutting it was perfect, but it just looks more natural if it's shorter. When they're super long yeah.. So I prefer the straight wigs but they're harder to find.. They tend to like to put like curl in them for whatever reason. It's just yeah., It's just the style right now.. I remember when I was a kid in the seventies I came out to LA to visit my father and his new wife., And I was little. I mean I must've been four. And she had long hippy hair. You know that long blonde hair that was part of down the middle of the leather fringe jackets and all that stuff. [ Tarla ] Yeah. [ Katie ] And I went to see them one morning like early in the morning and crawled into bed with them. And she had really short hair., But then, when I saw her at breakfast time, she had long hair again. And I remember as a kid being completely flipped out by that. Then I didn't really understand it. But the reason I brought that up was when I was a little older. I bought myself one of those cool big wigs at a Garage Sale. And that's how all the wigs in the seventies, I remember, were just straight long like down to your waist and just straight part of the middle. That was it. So. [ Tarla, ] Yeah.. Oh yeah, I have one other wig too, so I do have seven. That is more of kind of like a caramel with a darker root. So and then it gets lighter a little bit more blonde towards the ends and that one's straight too. And I just prefer the straight ones, but I love the straight hair yeah.. It just looks more natural. I think you know. Now that you're talking about this, I kind of wan na go out and buy a wig. You know. (, Katie, laughs, ), [, Tarla ]. You should ( indistinct ) My place in Hollywood, and I mean those are the most expensive ones and then the ones online yeah. Why not? I think every woman should have a wig., It's kind of like makeup or clothing.. It'S like it's fashion., So you can just kind of switch up. Your look, you know it's fun. And then you confuse people they see like, like you said you got confused as a child.. They see like online. I kind of always like think it's funny., I'm like ``. Oh people see me with all different color hair.'' And they really were like ,''. Well, what color is your hair really ?''? They kept asking me that they didn't know. Every day I showed up looking different.. I love that it's fun., So one thing I wanted to ask you was: how long did you wear the wigs while your gray hair was growing out, Like did you from the minute you started letting your hair go gray start wearing the wigs when you were doing These Facebook Lives And then you were just going gray kind of in secret under the wigs Like how did you- Not exactly.. I kind of feel like my skill is. I was a master at hiding the gray. [ Katie ] Yeah. [, Tarla ]. I don't know. And what I did initially is before I got the wigs you know, because again I got a really expensive wig to begin with'cause. I felt uncomfortable wearing a wig at all and I felt like people would know and I wanted to make sure no one knew it wasn't my hair., But prior to that I would start with the headbands.. So you know you wear a stick head band right. So you can kind of push your hair back like this, and you just got to release the cap down. That'S kind of starting to hide the gray. You know, And then it progressed where I would wear hats.. So I would wear. I did Facebook Lives wearing like baseball caps, so not really a cute cap, but something like that.. So I literally had like this much gray and then I you know would be dark here., And so my baseball cap would cover it and then I put like little braids or something so nobody had any idea.. So I went for walks like that because I just was like is I wasn't comfortable at the beginning., So I was pretty. I think I was. I had quite a bit of gray before I then said I can't ,''. Now I can't fool people anymore.'' Now: ( throat, clearing, ), they're gon na know pretty soon., I'm like running out of time and luck, so I'm gon na have to do something and that's when I went to go, get the wig.. So I've had the wigs for about a couple of years, yeah. Okay., Interesting and then did you ever reveal your gray hair to these people on Facebook Lives. Just out of curiosity, like do you feel comfortable with your hair now to like be out in public with it online Yeah., (, indistinct, ), I'm not gon na lie and say I'm a hundred percent comfortable. I feel pretty comfortable, but it's still it's something to get used to. I think.. You know we've seen in this group that you're from you know this big group that. And there's so many of them that a lot of women like it's a struggle at first. You know you're still, some people really embrace it and some people have it as more of a struggle., And I think it's for me. It'S still more of a little bit of a struggle, because I I never saw myself like going gray this early like it's, not something I ever would have done. If I didn't have an allergy, but you know everything happens for a reason and it's a good thing., But I did about a couple of weeks ago. Do my first Facebook Lives and I thought ,''. Oh, my gosh.'' Now like everyone's gon na know.'', And so I just you know, went on there and I think it's the day that you saw me with that with the red lipstick. And so I said ``, I feel really confident'' With the red lipstick on ,''. With the gray hair'', Because it really you know - and I probably should have worn that today. Really just to make your gray hair pop., And so I just I just went on and said `` I'm gray ,''. You know `` Hello, ,'', like you know, you know, and I even wrote. I have an email list and I wrote to my subscribers and I even said it's like one of my most opened emails.. It said `` Hi, look at my gray hair''. That was the subject line. And then, of course, everyone opened the email and they were like clicking on the link to see my gray hair because who's gon na say ,'' Hi. Look at my gray, hair.'', Nobody, except for me. I guess. (, both laughing ). I love it. And you know the thing is, since this quarantine happened, I am seeing it even in LA a lot more than I ever did before you know.. So I think if the hopefully, the next generation of people will feel more comfortable with their gray, hair'cause they'll see it's just a different color. Like if we could just get into the mindset that this is just a different shade of hair color.. It doesn't necessarily mean you're old, because some of us, like you and me, I started getting gray hair in my teens.. You said you saw your first ones at around age five. You know a lot of us go gray, young. It depends on your ethnic background and genetics, like I'm, also anaemic, and I found out recently that that can also cause early graying. You know., So it's like there's a whole bunch of reasons. We go gray, it's not unusual, but the way that people have been covering it up for 50 to 70 years. It makes it seem like it's unusual, but it's really not you know., But it feels like-. (, indistinct, ), Yeah, hopefully., (, indistinct ), Sorry go ahead.. I say you just can't change the culture overnight. You know like the like. We'Ve been conditioned to think that this is something nobody does., So it does take a little while to get used to it. But hopefully you know you'll feel eventually like you're, happy that I don't wan na say you're happy. You got an allergy nobody's gon na be happy about that., But you'll be happy with the hair and you'll feel confident with it. You know Yeah, you know, and I do for the most part. I just I think that now it's not even the color so much, but what the issue for me is the styling part. I feel like. I don't have the control that I had before you have control when you can dye your hair., So it's a loss of control there right That we're used to-, [, Katie, ] Right., And you have control when you can style your hair.. So that's also like a loss of control, so I feel like that is really the main thing. Like it's just about the styling. Now it's not even really the color as much it's just like. I feel it's like ,'', Oh no ,''! You know. I have gray hair, but on top of it like it's a styling., Do you see what I'm saying Yeah. [ Katie ] Yeah? I was gon na. Tell you. I just did a video recently where I talked to the owners of the Color Lounge in Burbank, and they talked not just about Salon Transitions to Gray, but also how to deal with things like Frizzy, Gray, Hair or other things.. And one thing they said that I didn't know is, and I have to go back to the video and watch it again., But she said ,'' To avoid the frizz'' that''. You should use a good conditioner'' And not rinse it out all the way.'' that it kind of coats your hair., I think, probably in a way the same way the hair dye did where it gets in there and it it does something to the cuticle of the Hair where it fills in the gaps. Right. [ Katie ]. So that's something to think about is maybe finding a really good conditioner and not rinsing it out all of the way and then maybe that would help you know Yeah. I know that helps., It's really I'm! I'M kind of I'm still like addicted to those hot tools that I'm frustrated. It'S like a little bit of a frustration but I'll figure it out. As I go. I mean, I'm lucky we're lucky that we have hair to begin with, no matter what color it is.. So I'm just I'm happy that I have you know good hair, still. Yeah. You have good thick hair and it's definitely a blessing.'Cause I've known several people that actually have Alopecia.. I mean that's really hard to deal with. So-, [, Tarla, ], yeah., [, Katie ]. So we all have to remember that when we were feeling bad about some of these things that come up with our hair, you know I've got crazy cowlicks. You know [ Tarle ]. I do too. ( indistinct, ) (, both laughing ) Mine, are all over the place that cow was really busy the day I was born so. In terms of maintenance for the wigs like. How do you store them, so they don't get damaged? Do you have those little heads like we always see in the movies or Yeah? Well, I have one of the heads for this expensive wig that I mentioned, but I don't have like it takes up a lot of room like seven of them and I actually would like to get more., So I've literally kept them. You know these are cheaper. Wigs. The ones I showed you, I've literally kept them in these totally fine in these they're like shoe boxes and that's the way that they come shipped to you and I've left those they're. Just I don't have room for seven heads. You know, along with clothes and everything. In an ideal world, yes, but I'm not too worried about these'cause. These are more. I call them like disposable. Wigs they're, like you know, $ 80, 130. They're, not gon na last forever. I think that when you get really expensive wigs, you have to have a head to put the wig on. For sure., But I think if they're cheaper, I mean I didn't know what other people do like is that's an ideal scenario, but it does take up well. There'S too much room for me to take up at the moment. Yeah I can see that. And with the synthetic wigs do have to do any maintenance. On those I know you said with the more expensive one: you'd take it in to get washed and flat ironed, but for the cheap wigs do you just put them in the box and they're pretty much? Okay and Yeah. I mean you know. The same thing. It'S about the 30 washes but let's say you're someone like me that wears the wig twice a month.. I mean I can wear this a long time without washing it., But it's the same thing. They just need to be washed. You wan na be careful when you're washing wigs, not to like, be aggressive in washing the hair., It's kind of more. You know swirling it in like soapy water and letting it soak, and you know maybe you know ,'cause. These are also I forgot to mention. They'Re Lace, Front Wigs., Which means that they have a little bit of lace. So it's to mimic like a natural like root, hair pattern at the front.. So it's not just like a harsh cutoff, where it's just like hair starts.. So with that lace, it's delicate.! That'S! Why I will not wash the expensive wig myself there's just no way, because you don't wan na destroy that lace, because the more that the lace kind of recedes into the hairline then you're out of-, (, stutters )? Sorry for that little bunk, you're out of your wigs., So your wig has to you have to get a new wig basically.. So since you have grown out your gray hair or since you started growing out your gray hair, have you had any negative comments from anybody, or has it been fairly positive Yeah? So it's really interesting when I first first started posting now. This is online I'll talk about offline., But online. When I started posting my gray hair pictures, I noticed that, like I felt like at first more men were liking. My pictures., Which kind of surprised me and I thought, :''. Well, that's good news right! ?''! You know. ( Katie, laughs ) For the future when I date when I'm not busy working, but I also got some really nice positive feedback from some. Ladies who follow me when I did my first Facebook Live and said that I looked great and which just really really heartwarming and so nice.. You know, on the flip side, there's always gon na be people who have an opinion.. So one time that stood out to me was when I was at the grocery store. I'M pretty sure my hair was all gray. It was one color at that point. It was up in a ponytail. And I literally got a couple of items: champagne and something else., And you know it was literally five items and I was like tryna run out of there and the checker, who was actually an older woman. So it's kind of interesting made a comment like ,''. I don't know why all you, young people'', Are dyeing your hair gray.'' And I'm like- ( Katie laughing ) ( laughing ), I'm like Oh, my gosh, like I'm, like I'm just trying to mind my own business and get out of here, like with my champagne., And I probably had a rough day already and then I'm getting this and I said, ,'' Well. This is actually my hair, color.'' And she's like ,'' Yeah. I know why all of you'' Want to like have gray hair before you're old.'' And I was offended.. So I went back actually it's a grocery store. I normally shop at., And so I went back a few days later and I just did pull the manager aside. Who was a man older man who had gray hair by the way white hair.? And then I said: `` Hey, you know ,'', I just wan na. Let you know'', I don't wan na get this woman in trouble'', But I do wan na. Let you know, like you know'', I felt really uncomfortable''. She commented on my appearance'', So I'm passing through the line.'', I'm just trying to get out of here and buy a few items.'' And he made a comment that, like he's like'', You know what I'm really sorry.'' And I said you know ``, I'm just'', I'm not Even comfortable yet., I mean this was a long time ago, a year ago. And then I said'', I just don't really want''. You know people really even'' Commenting on me.'' And he just said that she apparently had done that to a lot of people would comment on their appearance in general., Like I dunno what she was saying.. Oh my gosh ( indistinct, ) [ Tarla ]. Apparently it wasn't only me, it was ( Tarla, chuckles ). It was an ongoing issue, but there's stuff like that., So you know, I've gotten looks like when I - and I don't know if this, because I was less confident. I feel like, even though we were talking about confidence earlier - and I said I'm not a hundred percent. Confident I'm pretty confident. Like when I go out like I own it, it's my hair. I have gray hair. and just whatever, if you don't like it, that's your problem., But I do notice at the beginning and it could be the energy that I was giving off. Like I would be like at a Starbucks or in a Coffee Store and waiting in line to get my drink, and I noticed women looking at me. Kind of up and down - and I really felt like you know like they were doing double takes and that it Made me uncomfortable., It just is kind of like it's kind of like you you're just staring at somebody'cause. You don't like something about them. It was. I didn't get like a good vibe from it., So there's some stuff like that, but I think the most important part is just to realize. Like everybody's gon na have their own opinion, it doesn't matter what other people think.. It only matters. What you think - and I don't know - maybe maybe we're the trend-setters right - We're the trends-setters. We're the early adopters.. So you know we're gon na lead the way., And so eventually they're gon na be following us. Right, and what a lot of these is, I hate to say it. It usually often is, ladies, who are the harshest critics of other women who are going gray. If they only knew like. I haven't been hit on this much in my life since I as an older woman ,'cause, I'm 53 now and I have to say probably the last five years. You know five to 10 years, the flirtation level when I'm out in public has gone way down. You know which is fine, because when I was younger I got a lot of unwanted attention and I actually was kind of liking, the anonymity of not being bothered when you're out in public, you know., But it actually that started going up again., It's like once. You have the gray hair. I think it's unusual and a lot of men say they like it and they find it refreshing and real and stuff and ( clicks ). You know so it's interesting.. So these women don't know what they're missing, because a lot of the women that I know they've never had so much interest in them as they have since they went gray.. So you know-, [, Tarla ]. You know what It seems like there's a lot of men out there who, like it. Yeah, you just reminded me of a really quick story. I'Ll just share really fast, is that I was walking on the strand, so you know this'cause. You live in Los Angeles that you know Manhattan Beach, El Porto Area, with my dogs., And I don't know I feel like it was like a late afternoon. One day the sun was out, you know I had my hair up, you know and in a bun and with probably like a headband or something and I'm just walking minding my own business.. I don't think I had a lick of makeup on you know. I had my sunglasses on and I'm walking and this guy starts running after me.. You just reminded me of this. And he's this really good. Looking guy. I was like and he's like ,''. Oh, my God, I love your hair.'' And I'm like this is when I was still getting used to it. And I'm like ``. You do ?'' ( Katie chuckles ), Like kind of like ``, What ?'', And so he was saying that he's a hairstylist and he does hair and he basically was asking me out on a date., And I just I was like stunned, like I couldn't believe it. And it made me feel so good and it made it boosted, my confidence., Because I thought, there's literally he said `` I was on the bike path'' And I had to come up here to find you.''. He got off the bike path with this bike and it was like chasing me down. And I was, and he was paying me all. These compliments, like you, know, `` You're, beautiful, ,'', all those stuff, and I was just kind of stunned and I shouldn't have been. It sounds terrible just over gray hair, but I just was you know like it was a guy, my age in his probably early forties or something., And I just was like blown away by it.. So it made me feel so good. And I think, there's more men that love gray, hair like you're saying then, then you would think I mean. Look at Keanu Reeves dating his girlfriend has like silver gray, hair. Yeah. I know - and I'm just I do an anonymous survey for my blog every year, just to ask people what they wan na talk about.. I do wan na do a post sometime about dating while Greg's like I'm married and we've been married for 20. I'Ve even lost count like 27 years., So I obviously haven't been dating for awhile, but I wan na hear from more women because the women I do hear from say it hasn't affected their dating life like they thought it would. It's been good, it hasn't been negative.. I think it's other women that are the harshest critics more., If you're gon na have harshest critics, which there aren't as many as I thought about that, either it tends to be more women than men, you know., So the. Although the only negative comment, I really heard was an elderly man that I know, but I think the older generation is more dead, set against hair, letting your hair go gray.'Cause. He just saw my hair and he was like ,''. You know''. I, like your other hair color.'', You need to dye, it back.'' And I said ,'' Well, I like me here this way.'' And he's like ``. Oh okay.'' Like he was fine with it, but he felt free to tell me that, but he's actually come around and really likes it now., But I do think it seems like from what I hear anecdotally a lot of people in their seventies. Eighties. Really don't like us letting our go gray'cause, they feel like we're, consigning ourselves to look old., But that's because they don't see it as another hair color anymore. You know like we do., They see it as a sign of age.. You know because they were hiding it so., Yeah, oh well.; Hopefully that's changing., [, Tarla ], Hopefully yeah. Embrace who you are ( microphone, silenced, ). I guess that's what this is all about. Embracing who you are and that's your natural color? That'S actually, who you really are, if you have gray hair., [ Katie ]. Well, thank you for being here today and telling us about your journey and using the wigs would be a great option for a lot of people.. I think that's a great thing to do.. Oh, thank you. I really enjoyed this.. I really appreciate you having me on., Yeah you're, welcome and I think I'm gon na have to go out and buy some fun wigs just for the hell of it.. Why not? You know I have some funds.. Why not Yeah? I will give you all the info.. I definitely check them. Out. ( upbeat music, ),