Chit Chat Grwm: Life Update! Whats Going On? Relationships, New Business, Influencer Tea| Natasha S.

Oh, my gosh, i don't want the tears to fall. I have like 10 minutes to leave the house. Hey guys, welcome back to my channel and welcome if you're new, my name is natasha, go ahead and subscribe. We have a lot of fun on this channel. You know vlogs hair makeup tea. We spill a little bit of tea on ourselves, though not on other people, okay, um and all that good stuff. So go ahead and subscribe. So today, i'm doing a long over overview overdue. Chit chat life update q, a get ready with me um, i haven't done one in a while and a lot has changed since the last time we talked so it is about that time, but before we get into all of that today we have a sponsor um. Today'S sponsor is dossier. You guys know. I always talk about dossier. I love their perfumes, i'm saying it again for the people back, i love their perfumes. Dossier offers affordable luxury fragrances. So all your favorite brands or all the popular brands, you guys they have for a quarter a fraction of the price. Today, i'm wearing oriental cherry, which is a dupe or a replica of tom ford lost cherry. So i'm getting my little cheat card, cheat whatever you want to call it. So what i love about dossier is that the packaging is super simple, and that is a part of the reason why you're not paying three four hundred dollars for a perfume you're only paying like 35 dollars. So it comes in this small little box. Super cute, very simple, and when you take it out, it's going to literally say the name of the fragrance, which is oriental cherry, and it's going to have the top notes, the middle notes and the base notes. So when you order from them, it's also going to come with the sample size mines is gone. So when you order your fragrance in the box, it's also going to come like a sample size fragrance which mines is gone because i'll be putting them in my purse. So you're able to test out the sample size and see the longevity the smell, see if it smells like the perfume. You want it to smell, like all that good stuff um, and if you don't like it, you can return it. No questions asked and you can move on with your life, but you're not going to need to return it because dossier delivers okay, literally every perfume that i have received from them. If i have one similar, i always compare and contrast or like go to the store and smell like i personally, don't have um tom ford lost cherry, but i've smelt it. It smells exactly the same if i'm not mistaken, um lost cherries like 400 for a bottle. That'S equivalent to about the same size, one second, so i do have um tom4 bitter peach, and this is 50 millimeters. This was 350. I think i think it's been a long time. Um oriental cherry is 50 millimeter, so same size for a quarter of the price. This one is like 30 something dollars and if you use my code down below, you can get it for even less so make sure you guys check out dossier, i'm going to be spraying myself. I always fear myself right before i go out. It smells so good. Like you guys the notes in this, let me just read them to you real quick. The top notes are cherry almond and cinnamon. The middle notes are cloves, rose, jasmine and plum. The base notes are peru, balsam, balsam and tonka bean and vanilla. So it just is a nice layered fragrance. It does not smell super cherry ish like when, i think cherry, i think, of like medicine. It'S not giving that at all um. It smells really really good. So make sure you guys check out dossier. I will leave all the information down in the description box and now it's time to get into this chit chat. Okay, so keep watching all right guys. So i'm about to get ready. Actually, i'm going to dinner tonight what's new and i thought i would do this chit chat. Okay, i'm excited because i haven't like sat down and talked to you guys for a while um. So now is the time so i asked a few weeks ago. I'M a little late - i know don't drive me asked a few weeks ago, if you guys have any questions, so it's going to be kind of like a life update and q a get! Oh! No! We'Re not doing that today. This is gon na, be a live update in q. A um chit chat, get ready with me, okay, so anything that i show - and i don't mention - check the description box - i'm not really focusing on products today we're talking. I would give you guys a t on product and today it's getting a little personal, so i'm starting with my hair - and i just don't know where my day went it just has been just like flying by, but i do have a video on this wig on My other channel, if it's not up yet it will be on the other channel and i will link it below. Which brings me to my first question that i got a lot of. So i'm not going to answer each individual question because a lot of the questions were repetitive, so i'm just going to kind of group them into one. You know so we're not repeating ourselves and having a three hour: video, okay, um. So the first question was: why do i have two channels? So some of you guys? Oh my gosh, you guys pause. I got a new curling iron, the t31, i'm so excited um. I hope i like it and i just got a new hairspray. I really like this l'oreal hairspray, look at me talking about products and i shouldn't be oh, my gosh, but i just went to target and got another one of these anyway. So question is: why do i have two channels so my first channel, which i made literally like a decade ago, um - i don't know what happened it got demonetized. They have not told me um. I didn't do anything to my knowledge different than i'm doing now, but they demonetized me and i was never able to get it appealed situated. So i just decided one day literally to just make a new channel and honestly, i feel like it was one of the best things that i did simply because i was able to kind of like start over. I feel like - and i've talked about this before i feel, like my channel started, going a different direction that i wasn't very fond of or like nothing. I wasn't fond of it just went a different direction that i didn't originally plan on it going. So all the content on this channel is the kind of content that i want to have a long term, so the chit chats the vlogs, the you know. I still like the beauty and hair content, but you know i, let's keep it a bunch. The other channel is like hair content strictly and you know um. We got to pay the bills around here, so it kind of just worked out the way this is so bouncy, oh baby, oh baby, but anyways um yeah. It just kind of you know worked out for the best, i'm still growing this channel um, i kind of i not kind of i do know what direction i want this channel to go when i'll. Let go of the other one. If i do i'm not sure, but for now i do have two and they're both under um the same name, which brings me to my next frequently asked question: why are both channels under natasha s, because i just feel like why not i'm not trying to have Two identities i ultimately want one channel: nobody wants to juggle two channels, you know um and i feel like if anybody is familiar with me, are looking for me, they'll see both of my channels. So if you search natasha s, both channels come up, a lot of people have kind of like i don't want to say, complained about it, but complained about it, and it's like natasha like why? Don'T you just change the name to make it easier to find you? How would it be easier to find me with two two different names? Do you get them saying like if anybody can explain their theory about that to me, let me know um. I still want to be one entity on youtube. I never planned on having two channels. You know it's just something that i'm getting used to and working around so yeah. That'S the reason why i should do this smaller. That'S the reason why i have two channels under the same name, but you know subscribe to both. I don't think it hurts to subscribe. Like is there a problem with subscribing to both channels, it's free you're, getting content very frequently, so you know do your thing? Do you do your thing? I am just so amazed by this curling iron right now like, and it's like smoothing out my hair, like it's doing what a curling iron is supposed to do. So, i'm trying to like group the questions together. So i'm going to get like the youtube questions out. The way personal makeup artists questions out the way, all that so anyways. The next question is: what advice can you give an upcoming youtube bur besides consistency? Well, honey consistency is key. Like honestly, it sounds so cliche but um consistency and i would also say staying true to yourself and making content that you like, i think, a lot of times a lot of people get on youtube and they get lost because they're constantly comparing themselves they're constantly. I'M sorry if it's bothering you guys that i'm not looking at you, i i got ta go but um a lot of people constantly compare themselves to other people's content and what they're doing what they're not doing like and that's just not the way to go. Yeah. That'S the best way to go about it like making the content that you like, like think about it. If you have a job and you're always given a task that you hate, are you going to be happy? No you're not going to be happy, but if you're given a task that you like at work and you're, doing something that you love you're, going to do your job and you know you're going to do it well, so that would be my advice: okay, okay, tasha. What are you doing it's like getting caught in here, yeah? That would be my advice to you. I hope that helps um don't get caught up in like trying to keep up like yeah. It helps to be like on trend, i guess and stuff, but you know think longevity like. I personally feel like i make content that i'll look back at like yeah, it's a little cringy to look back at something sometime, but i don't like regret anything. You know. Um, i don't look at my content like, oh, my god. Why did i do that? Like you know, i feel like when you do certain things for like clout or things that are trendy um to get a quick reaction out of people and a quick following and likes and views, and all that that's when you have to constantly reinvent yourself, and you Have to um rebrand and you get lost in the sauce like i for the most part, and i'm just speaking on myself, like my content, is very consistent. I do a lot of different content. Um like i just don't do vlogs, i don't just do hair. I just don't do makeup, you know i do it all um, but for the most part, my my content is consistent and true to me so like, even if i'm going through a rough patch in life, it's not hard for me to get in front of the Camera and do it because sometimes but it's not hard for me to do it because it's me, you know, i'm not faking something, i'm not doing something that i don't believe in like yeah, so i hope that makes sense um. But you know good luck to you. Start your youtube channel is all i can say is start it don't not start it get out of your head and just do it. Like don't question yourself just do it just not looking my mom said where your mama at girl ain't, nobody worried about you. Another question i got was um and mind you. These questions were from a few weeks ago. Um was about my rapper recreation series. Am i still doing it yeah, i'm still doing it it just i was going through something and that kind of content requires me to be very. I do love doing it um, but that kind of content requires me to be very creative. Very, like you know, engaged interactive and you know it just wasn't there for me at that time, but i am back. I did post one i think two weeks ago and i do have some more planned, but originally i planned on doing them weekly, which i thought was going to be so easy. Like you know, one creation a week, one recreational week is going to be so easy, but y'all it was not easy. It'S a it's a lot that goes into those, so i just was like you know, i'm just going to take my time. If i wake up one day and i'm like i want to do a recreation today, i'm going to do it so there's no schedule anymore. Unfortunately uh-uh this will need to be title. There'S no schedule anymore, unfortunately, um but um they're, not they're, not done. I literally have like if any female rapper you can think of is on my list, so i literally have like 12 people, and i've only done four. I'Ve only done four, so i do have a few more people that need to be done so i'll get to it soon, guys um but yeah. It'S coming, okay, so the next question i got was: how do you handle comparisons to other influencers? Honestly, it doesn't bother me like i don't again. I don't compare myself to anybody. The only thing that i'm going to be 100, honest with you guys that kind of irritates me and it's not a big deal but like since we're speaking on it um. I don't like that people try to compare um and it's not even a comparison thing. I don't like that. People try to pick me against my influencer friends, so there's one it's one thing to compare me to influencers and then trying to compare me to people that you guys know are my friends. You know um and trying to say, like oh we're, copying each other, we're this and that whole time, um hello, we're friends. We talk about content, we talk about clothes, we talk about makeup, we talk about a lot of things and we're friends, because we have similar interests, so no duh we're gon na have similar content. Yeah we're gon na have similar things like, and it's like, not even speaking, all my friends anymore, just in general, with being compared to um other creators or influencers. How much different are we supposed to be like if you have a job right? Are you the only one that works that position most likely? No, you have co-workers, you guys are all assigned to do the same thing, so yeah we're going to have the same kind of content, the same sponsorships, the same outfits, the same shoes, the same hairstyle the same this, it's just a part of the job. Okay. So to answer your question not really, but not too much, okay, not too much on me, my friends, okay! Thank you all right! So sorry, my mom called in the middle of me answering this question, so let me run it back, so the question was: do you feel like it's harder being a black brown skin beauty influencer? So, first of all, first of all, first of all, it's hard being black. So that answers your question right there um, but honestly, yes, and no, we know how the beauty industry is. We don't have to get into that today, but we know you know we peak. We know what's going on, but i don't think that you should let that hinder you. I don't look at like okay. How could i say this? If i don't get a certain amount of likes or i don't get a certain amount of views on a video, i'm not like it's, because i'm brown skinned like honestly like please like please it just pushes me to work harder, and you know do my thing like I just i just you guys, i'm telling you i'm probably the worst person, that's why i don't be doing q and and stuff. My answers are so like cut and dry and light. It is what it is um, but no, that's just the reality of it. For me, like, i feel, like i've, gotten great opportunities being a black girl um, i don't know but uh yeah. I feel like there's a little bit of shadiness in the um industry, of course, but that's in any that's anywhere, but you know don't let that hold you back. Do your best and be your best. You, okay, the next question is: do you think influencing has changed over the years? Has it gotten easier or harder to be an influencer in terms of subscriber growth, staying, creative and motivation to continue absolutely um? I feel like being an influencer like back in the day, and, when i say back in the day like even up to like five years ago, was something that was like. Not obtainable, like you know like it, was something that was like out of reach. You'Re like oh, my gosh. This person is a youtuber like i wish i could do that, but now it's so much easier. You don't even need a camera and the fancy setup in the beauty room and this and then that you can literally blow up from tick tock. You can use your phone and be making content um. You know everybody is more equipped and a little bit more savvy. These days so yeah, i think it's easier to become an influencer or i use the word influencer loosely, but um it's easier to gain a following, or subscribers or whatever you want to call it um it just is it simply. Is it is harder to be creative? I wouldn't say it's harder to be creative, because if you have it in you, you're gon na, do your thing you know so again. I wouldn't focus too much on what other people are doing. I would simply just do you if you want to make a video that you think is not cool or trendy. Do it anyways, that's what you like. That'S what you want to do. That'S what you want to put out on this platform then do so, and i wouldn't say that it's hard to stay motivated but like it is so for me personally. If i see like the same thing over and over i'll, be like oh my gosh, i'm not gon na. Do that because, like nobody wants to see it again, you know i get in my head and then i just don't do anything or i do something else. Okay seriously tasha: what are you doing um, but you know again, like i keep saying you just have to like brush all that off and focus honey focus. So my ex, where do i find the inspiration for my looks um? Simply the internet, instagram twitter, sometime things just pop into my head. Sometimes my friends inspire me be like girl. You should do this. You should do that. You should do look this like that. It'S very, very random um, but yeah um. Sometimes things don't come out the way i envision, but okay, this doesn't look terrible. I need to put this chair up more. I look crazy. Oh this hair color is so pretty. I had to fix this. What is this doing? Oh, my gosh, okay, so moving along moving along to some juicier questions honey. So i got a lot of people asking me this. What are my long term goals? What'S my five year plan five year goal, let me tell you something: natasha is just trying to get it through the day. Okay, i literally do not have a plan. I know it sounds so good and so inspiring to hear, like somebody say like. Oh in five years i want to do this and that and this and that, but if i'm being honest with you between the pandemic and everything else going on in the world like sit well since the pandemic, it's like you, don't know. What'S gon na happen, you don't know where life is gon na. Take you so for me to have a full plan, not that i don't have goals for me to have a full plan in like pressure myself, when i don't even know what tomorrow's gon na bring. I'M not doing it, i'm simply just taking it day by day, and i know that i already have a path made for me and i'm just gon na keep going down that path until i get to where i need to get um again. Of course i have goals and stuff, and i don't even think honestly, i would share all of them because not because i don't want to it's just like you know when you say something, it's like that's when the pressure is on, i have pretty much always kept. My goals and stuff to myself - and you just see me work see me do my thing so yeah um, don't pressure yourself to have a five-year plan this and that, because you don't know my life five years ago, i did not know i would be here today. You know like i was young. I was irresponsible. I was just a mess. I was really a mess like i'm still a mess but like i was really a mess, so it's like things are just so much different. Now that it's like honestly, if we're being honest, i did not even think i was gon na, be on youtube like this five years ago. I did not think i was gon na be a makeup artist for real five years ago. I was doing makeup, but it was just like one of those things like oh quick money. Um, you know i love doing it, but as far as a career, i did not think that i was going to be able to live off of doing that. You know it was just like you know, quick little weekend, money or this and that and that it wasn't really something that i was like. Okay, i'm gon na go full force with this. I just kind of fell into it. So don't pressure yourself, you guys. It'S just really just you know every day, be thankful, be thankful, grateful that you are here brother, healthy, all that oh, this is a good one. Someone said: how do you stay productive at times when your mental is exhausted? I simply do nothing. I have come to the conclusion that when i am not in a good mental space - and i spoke about this um to you guys already, but when i'm not in a good mental space, it's just that just means it's time cut it relax reset um i mean I do have to push through sometimes um, but for the most part, the way my life is set up. I kind of like always wanted my life to be like this, where i had control of. If i wanted to get up and go to work, if i wanted to do this or that isn't that - and i i do have that choice - you know so um yeah, but i'm not in the mood to do something or if i'm just mentally exhausted. I will literally just like clock out of life and i will sit back, reflect and i'll come back. That'S why i be going on hiatuses, sometimes um, and not even just from youtube like if y'all, don't see me a lot of times. Nobody has seen me my friends, my family, nothing, i'm just aligning my chakras okay. So that's what i do personally um again. I don't have like. I don't have any like secret code for that, but that's what i do. Um someone asks. The same person asks. Do you ever feel guilty from taking time away from family and friends from mental health? Absolutely not! I'M not gon na lie, though i used to so i used to have like this fomo thing, especially like with my friends um, because you guys know. I always pretty much lived with my family, so there was never no like time away from them until now, but um i would have fomo. I feel like oh, my god, they're gon na think i'm acting weird or they're gon na think, like i don't like them, and i just have to come in my truth. My friends understand now that, like when tasha's not in the mood she's, just not in the mood, it does not mean that she's acting weird. It does not mean that there's a problem, and i just didn't. I don't like conflict. So i would do things that kind of made me uncomfortable like and not even uncomfortable. I can't say that because nobody can force me to do anything but like i will go out after a long day at work and like now. That'S just not a thing for me. Like all my friends know. If i worked, do not ask me to go out, i love you guys but like unless it's like a celebration or something like i'm you're, most likely not gon na see me you know so um. It'S just little things like that. I just have to learn like i have to pace myself and just really take my time with myself, because i i'm all i got at the end of the day. You know the camera went off. Sorry but like i said, i'm not gon na um burn myself out um for the sake of trying to please people, i'm over that um in my life, not me trying to layer. My hair, like i, don't, have an hour left someone asked how hard is it making friends at this stage in life? Honestly, it has not been that hard, i've kind of sort of had the same friends since like high school. For the most part, i have new friends as well, but, ironically enough, i met them on social media and a lot of the people that i have met on social media. I was, i became cool with before i became an influencer, so it just kind of like happened, but it's not like don't think like. Oh, you have upper hand because, like you're, an influencer - and you know these people know like a lot of these people before i was even posting on youtube or anything. We were just mutuals. You know so social media really does um help with making friends um, especially in this day and age. You know it's a very um social media kind of world um, but also, like you know, going out. You always meet people. I'Ve met people out before like hey girl, then we follow each other or we get each other's number. And then we like hang out or something like it's happened before it's. You know, i'm not the most social, but it's happened before um, but yeah. If you want to just get out there, i mean i've literally had people dm me before and okay, i'm not i'm not suggesting this, but i've literally had people dm me before and be like hey like. Can we be friends - and i'm like depends on the person and not that not that i'm like picking and choosing people, but i can just see a vibe sometime. I can just feel it in my spirit but um sometimes you'll be like yeah like. Let'S go get something to eat or something um. That does not mean dm me asking me to be different. Okay, i'm not trying to be mean, but i'm just saying in my in my social media life the things that i've experienced. You know it's been like that before so yeah um. You know, if you feel like you want to make new friends. Just you know put yourself out there put yourself in different environments: um, that's all i can give you you're asking an anti-social person. So all right guys, i had a brief intermission but we're back to the questions. Um. A lot of you guys are asking. Do i plan on starting a business or a makeup line or a hairline, so i would love to start a business. But if we're being honest, i'm not gon na say i'll, never do it, but um. Okay, like deep down inside deep, deep, deep, deep deep down inside, i would love to start a makeup business, but i would love to do it right. You know, so that would mean my money would have to be very, very very long to do it. The way that i would want to present it to you guys, um hair, i really don't have a desire to do like a hair business um to be honest with you, but again we never know, but i do have some um business ideas that are not related To either or i feel like, i kind of want um, not that i want to come out of this industry, but i would prefer to do a business not related to the two or connected to youtube, just something outside of this. You know um, so i am working on something i do have some idea. Well, i'm not working on something, i'm thinking on something myself um, but i have been thinking on some things and i'm like okay, i can make. I can make this a thing guys. I can make this happen, so um yeah, maybe in the future, i'm not worried about that right now. Right now, i'm just focused on my makeup business um growing on my platform and that's about it. I'M not going to stress myself out, but i do think of things like anytime. I write something down anytime, i think of something i literally just write it down so that i can come back to it later and you know get to work when i'm ready question of the century. Do i want a bb ow? No, i've told you guys that before i have nothing against them, i just know that i'm a punk and i'm not gon na um - i'm not gon na go through with that, so i'm not gon na. Do that. So sorry to disappoint you guys that i cannot give you um legs and hips and body body. Okay, i apologize, but that's not my thing um! I don't know all right, so i'm gon na go back to my hair later. I need to do this face in like 20 minutes but um. So a lot of you guys asked. How am i doing where have i been um mind you this was weeks ago, but i was on a little like hiatus um, but i'm back, i'm back and i'm better um, but you guys i freaking posted a vlog that was like a month in some change Old and that actually went up, i believe now, two weeks ago, two weeks ago, i think two weeks ago, um - and i was so sad. I was so so sad, you guys and a lot of you guys were do like so many dms. I was like okay. Looking back, i was like i do look sad as hell like relax, sasha um, but um. A lot of you guys were dming me and like asking me. If i'm, okay, sending me prayers, um commenting all types of stuff, and i just want to say i just really appreciate it um. I am doing okay now, but i was not okay. I was in a very very, very, very, very, very, very, very bad. Okay, that's dramatic, but not really, but i was in a very bad situation with somebody um y'all know it's always always the makeup um and you know it just it was just really bad and it was something that i was actually dealing with for, like the last Year and i never talked about like all the time he was like - oh my god, touchdown do you have a boyfriend. I hate eating this, i'm like um but yeah. I it was just really bad and the situation honestly was getting from bad to worse and it had to stop. It literally had to stop, because you guys can even see, like my moods, were always so up and down, because the situation that i am i was in was constantly like. Traumatizing me like it was, so it was just really bad. I'M not gon na get too into detail with that, but um yeah. That last time when i had like vlogs - and i was looking really really sad - and i really was like - i need to practice this video and get this out, but it just is what it is. We all have our moment so whatever, but um yeah, when i posted that that was pretty much like my last straw um and i just had to deal with it. So i completely cut myself off. That'S why a lot of people were asking like where you been um. I might have posted on my story a little bit or something, but there was no recording. There was no youtube videos, i literally i'm not even being dramatic, was in bed for like three weeks straight like in bed, did not leave the house um. Well, i did leave the house. I went to my mom's house, but um yeah. It just was like a bad situation and i literally had to it's gon na sound dramatic again, but i literally had to mourn that person in that situation. Um - and it really affected me more than i would like to admit, but it did, and it just is what it is looking back at it. But now i am okay. I am 100 okay, and this isn't one of those things like. Oh i'm, okay, but then i'm gon na link be back in the same. No, no, no, no! No! No! I'M the kind of person, i'm not going to speak on anything until i have made up my mind. You know i'm not the friend, that's constantly like back and forth or like seeking validation or opinions. I, like, i said, have been going through. I have been going through this situation for a long time like really longer than a year, but like it got out of control this last year, so it was just really like okay yeah. So right now, i'm feeling fine. I actually am great. I think you guys can see it like. I'M, okay, i'm fine! I really it's like one of those things where like when you go through something like traumatic, it kind of like triggers you, but not a bad trigger. It'S like it. It snaps you out of it and it gets you back so um. I went through a lot of like this year me disappearing and not posting frequently, and i'm sad, i'm moody, i'm going through it every other month. Enough was enough because also i'm not going to grow constantly going on a hiatus, i'm not going to be where i want to be constantly um crying and be a mopey. I need to get my brushes one. Second, i'm back and i don't have a sponge. How did i grab all my brushes and did not get a sponge really sasha um, but yeah? So i said all that to say: i'm: okay, everything was okay. Really am i okay? What'S going on that, was it um and then, like i'm, just an emotional person too, like i've noticed like the older that i've gotten the more i like am more affected by things like i used to just like brush things off and be like whatever, but i Just have become very in tune with my um emotional side, these past few years, so yeah so next question. The next question is: how is living alone um? I like it honestly, i really enjoy having my own like routine, my own schedule, because you know, like my mom, she didn't bother me but also like it was her house. You know so like hold on. Let me focus real quick, so you know also like jamaican moms like when it's time to get up it's time to get up like they will tell you to get up out of bed for no reason and they just be having their days and like. I would have to act fake busy, sometimes like just to just keep the peace in the house and um yeah. I don't have to do it anymore. I can lay in bed all day without her bothering me or anything like that. So um i really do enjoy. Like having my own little routine and my own schedule and doing what i want when i want how i want it again, my mother was not a bother, but a mom is gon na, be a mom. You know um, but yeah living alone has been very interesting. Um, i will say number one rules, keep your peace, honey and everybody do not need to be in your house. That'S that's what i'm going to tell you um, going back to what i was just talking about. I you know, thought i was being grown and stuff and i just messed up the whole energy in my house i feel like, and i really wanted to leave like i seriously was like oh no, no, no! No! No! This is not. This is not what i envision moving out being like i gots to get the heck up out of here honey, but you know i prayed on it still praying on it and yeah, but i would just say: girls, girls, living alone, keep your peace and everybody don't Need to be in your house, okay gosh! You guys are asking my status. Do i date? Oh my god um! So i'm single, okay, you're, a single like a pringle. I don't know why people say single, like a pringles when pringles come in stacks like they're. Never really single so like. Could we come up with something else, but anyways, i'm single and do i date um, like i said i just got out of a very weird situation and so like right now, i'm not dating, but i'm not against dating. Like honestly, a lot of my friends like i know you don't want to date right now like that, which is a lot like that, i'm like no, actually i'm ready, like i'm cool like when you go through something and you really sit back and reflect. Let me tell you, if you're sitting in the bed for real for three weeks and you're talking to yourself and only yourself, you do a lot of talking and a lot of reflecting, and i really realize, like you know what i want. What i like, and the only reason, okay, let me tell you this most times if you get out of a situation and you don't want to date, it's because you're still stuck on that person and you're still hoping for something to happen with that person. You know um, that is not it over here. Okay, i'm ready for something new, something fresh, something healthy, something fun, not traumatic. You know like i'm, just ready to really um live my life and have some fun and yeah okay guys. So i'm talking a little bit too much, so i'm gon na like get through my face real, quick and then we're gon na continue, because i cannot continue to move this slow because i have a dinner reservation and i'm not gon na be late. It was about. Is moving um, so, let's move on now that i've gotten that part done. I have to focus on that. Well, let me set my under eye first, because i don't need creases honey. I don't i do not so i'm using my patrick star, that's my go-to! My favorite setting powder - oh my gosh. I completely forgot this question from earlier and i remember it in my head, but i couldn't find it when i was scrolling, but anyway someone said how do you fit? How do you stay motivated when you feel like people aren't watching? It was like a three-part question. She said like. I want to post more cool things, diys and stuff, but i'm like girl. Nobody cares and i end up not posting and it's just a cycle, but how do you stay on top and non-stop lol, okay, so um? Let me get my powder, so um i feel like - and i kind of spoke on this earlier girl post. What you want post, what you want somebody's watching and somebody is going to appreciate your video, appreciate your content. There'S no such thing as no one watching, even if it's 50 people watching, even if it's 10 people watching there is no such thing as nobody watching or nobody carrying. I feel like. Why would you not pose if it's something that you want to do? Why are you not posting it? You know like you, just got ta go for it. My brushes are wet because i just washed them so, but um yeah just post it, because what else are you gon na pose? Are you gon na post, something that's? What cool trendy that everybody else is doing um just to blend in and get lost in the sauce? No do something that stands out from people. I know diys and stuff are like um they've always been around, but i don't see much diys anymore. So if um or maybe that's just not like i'm not a diy girl but um, if you posted that, maybe people would be like. Oh let me see what this girl is doing. Let me let me check her out and then that's how you gain an audience. So again, stay true to yourself: do not worry about people not watching or feel like you're wasting your time or this, and that i'm telling you there's no such thing because so um, a lot of you guys, are asking. What am i taking a vacation or is my next destination? So honestly, it probably won't be until my birthday, my birthday's in october, for those who don't know um, that's probably the next time that i will be gone. I was supposed to actually be in july, be in july, be in la for the whole month of july, but that did not work out because i was just going for leisure and if i worked, i worked but whatever but um um. I need eyeshadow, but a lot of work opportunities ended up coming up, so i was like um leave and spend money and miss out on opportunities or um work. You know, so that's what i did. I ended up staying and it just is what it is. That'S how my life is when you're like freelancing or work for yourself, everything's so up and down like yeah. I have a lot of control over it, but i make very logical decisions or i try to okay but um yeah. So that's what happened where i'm going, though, is between like three places the place i really want to go. I don't think everybody's going to be able to go between because it's july now then august and september then october and like it's just not realistic, i mean it is but um yeah, i don't know we'll see but there's other places to go. I want my close friends to be there. I want everybody to be able to be there and participate and have a great time stress free, because if i'll be honest, all my friends, we all need a vacation. Okay, we all do it's about that time. Somebody asked me my sexuality, i am straight honey. I am straight. Do i give off something else? I really feel like people ask me that, because y'all don't be seeing me with a man or i don't post a man which i probably i'm not gon na say never but like imagine me, posting a man and then i'm on here, sad and crying like i'm. Not saying it's not to happen, but like that's just not mine, that is not brand for me, okay, this is not aware for me, so yeah i just you know. I keep it cute, i'm not really into the whole. Like posting thing too, oh my gosh, and you guys i will get into this with guys too sometimes about like me, not posting them. Why? Why is he being thirsty? Like sir, you are not doing anything post-worthy, but getting on my damn nerves and you want to be posted like what do you do? This is the thing y'all. This is the thing. This is the thing. That'S the thing we bout to get juicy and kind of off topic, but listen. I i'm not talking to anybody right now or dating anybody. I know i've told you guys that and then i really was, but i'm really not right now but um. I will like talk to guys right date. I guess um and i say date because there's like levels to dating, like i feel like dating, is not just going out to eat and taking me out to dinner like boring guys. Just really just don't do what i need them to do like the dayton scene, and that was another question. Someone said how's the dating scene in atlanta. I'M not gon na pinpoint just atlanta and say it's bad. I think it's just our age group, our generation, if you want to call it that it's just really hard out here. Okay, so get your old man and be happy. Okay, let me not say that, because somebody's gon na somebody's gon na come to me but like no for uh, the dating scene is just very like weird um. If you wanna call it that um and yeah men don't do what they're supposed to do. Personally, i i've let a few slip through the cracks. Now, i'm not perfect, but i feel like i have certain standards and requirements from men and i'ma, give you a few chances. Y'All know i'm a libra. I give them chance after chance of the chance and, like you know, after a while, if you just don't fulfill that, then you got ta go because i know personally what i can bring to a relationship or you know, into somebody's life. So if that can't be matched, i'm not interested so the whole, like posting thing, like posting a guy like if i ever post anybody, i'm not gon na, say i'll, never, post anybody, because, like i'm, not hiding anything from anybody, but if i ever post anybody just Know that, like he's doing what he's supposed to do - and it's not even just materialistic just overall doing what he's supposed to do being a good person, you know like just regular things, um, that a lot of people lack, i feel like i feel like the bar - Is so low that, like those things are really hard to come right now, so it's just very weird: we'll have another dating conversation for another day. Okay, let me um i'm getting too comfortable. Let me um chop chop and i'll be right back a few more questions. My face is coming together, so i'm okay now i was almost gon na - have a breakdown um, but someone asked when did. I know that i wanted to um be a makeup artist and a youtuber, and i think i kind of just talked on this. I'Ve talked on this whoa act like you went to school tasha. I kind of spoke on this at the um towards the beginning of the video but um. I didn't know that i wanted to do that so coming out of high school. I just knew i was going to be a dermatologist, so like that's like the start of it like, i guess i was always really into like people's skin. You know all that um i just was like: i'm gon na be a dermatologist and i'm gon na be making well. It was either a dermatologist or a pharmacist when i actually went to school. My goal was to be a pharmacist because the dermatologist was too close to a surgeon for me but um. I guess you can say that was started. I was always into like skin and like whatever all that, all that good stuff right um but school just wasn't for me either i never finished school wasn't for me um. So what ended up happening? I'M gon na give you guys a quick little background of my life for those who do not know so um. Where did i want to start so? I never finished college right wasn't my thing. I literally worked um plenty of jobs, so i worked at chick-fil-a for about six to seven years. I worked there for a very long time. I always had that job, like basically straight out of high school. I had that job um, but i had jobs in between. I worked at sephora, i worked at ulta, i worked at kohl's, i freelanced um and i had like other little jobs, but that good shot. It was very short-lived because no um but yeah. So i really was lost. That'S what i'm saying like five years ago. I knew i did not know what i was doing, um so long story short, it's actually a funny story. Oh no. We don't have time for my life to be coming off, so long story, short um. You know i was freelancing from home. I was like you know, getting bookings and stuff. The thing is, i was working from home and at that time i was living at home with hear me out now, my mother, my brother, my sister and my grandma. Okay, we were all living together so like for me having clients coming in, and out of my house was just not really ideal for me or my mom. She really wasn't feeling it, but she wasn't gon na be like no. I mean there was this one time. She got mad at me and she said i couldn't have people in the house anymore and that's what kind of pushed me um out cuz like what you mean. I can't have nobody in the house making money, but um yeah so and also i i lived in the same area that i do now, which was like kind of far but like nobody's driving all the way out here to get their makeup done in somebody's house. That'S just the reality of it. People like to go to a space, it's not the biggest deal if you work from home. If that's what you have to do but like what i'm about to tell you proves my point. So there was this one night um there was a mutual um on instagram, we didn't know each other, but we knew of each other kind of sort of um and she was like hey like. Can you do makeup tonight and i'm telling y'all it was like 10 p.m. 9. P.M. 10. P.M! So i'm like yeah sure she's like oh i'm in buckhead she had like just opened a salon, um and um. I thought i was just doing her makeup, so i packed my little kit with like two foundations: um one beauty blender like i didn't even have a real. I had a real kit, but it wasn't like what it was now like. So i just thought i was doing one person's makeup do y'all know i went there and did like five people's makeup that night, so i didn't leave there until like 12 or 1 o'clock um we clicked instantly, because i started working like the next week. I ended up working, i was a little skeptical about. I was just really nervous, you guys know. I don't like people, i don't like. I was really nervous. I was really really nervous, but i was like this is a push that you needed. So i ended up working there, um and honestly from like day one i was just booked, i had clients, i was booked every weekend and i'm gon na be honest with you. That was what 2016 or 17. since then i've been booked every weekend non-stop. So that was like the start of that. I didn't last longer that salon that's a whole nother story for a whole another day, baby um that did not end well um. It was fun while it lasted, but shortly after that i went to another salon and then um that didn't last long either it wasn't bad, but it just didn't last long and then i ended up getting my own space because i was like okay, i'm not gon Na be hopping around, this is my job. Now it's how i make my money, so i ended up having my own space and i have now had my own space for about four years now, so i know it's crazy how things happen, but back to the original question, i never thought that i was going To be a makeup artist like when i even took that job at the shop um, it was just like a weekend because i was still working at chick-fil-a when i started there. So it was just like a little side thing, blah blah and it just became like a full-time thing like i was like wow like okay, i'm a makeup artist. Now you know um and then, as far as youtube. So in between all of that that i just told you i wanted to do youtube so bad, you guys, i wanted to do youtube. So so i'm about to cry! Oh my gosh, why am i getting emotional? Oh, my gosh? Oh my gosh, i got ta turn around. Oh my gosh. What just happened! It'S like here's, a joy, oh my gosh, not when i just did this whole face that almost did not make the cut. Oh my gosh whoa. I was not expecting that. Oh my gosh. I don't want the tears to fall. I have like 10 minutes to leave the house. Oh my goodness. Where did that come? I was not expecting that guys. Oh, oh my gosh, so i wanted to do makeup so bad. You guys but um. Oh, oh, my gosh. I'M too cute to cry: i'm not going to cry so anyways every time i say it, my eyes get watery again, so i wanted to do makeup, so i mean not makeup youtube's, so bad, you guys um, but it just it. Just was not my time. I really don't feel like it. I would post um. I would post right um, but it was like once in a while. I really just did not. It just was not giving what i wanted it to give like in this okay. So this is the thing i wanted to post so bad, but it just was like i didn't, have the proper equipment, which is why i'm telling you guys just do things but also like everything, has its timing. But this is just my story and i'm just sharing it um, but i really wanted to do it, but at the time you know with me for one not finishing school, no kind of degree, no kind of nothing i really need to fit. I really needed to figure out what are you gon na do? What are you gon na? Do because doing nothing is not okay with me, so i and i also feel like in a sense it's a little bit. I feel like i disappointed my mom, because i did not finish school, so i was like girl, you got to do something and i was living at home. It'S not like. I was like just being grown and i was out the house like i'm having to face my mom every day. What are you doing what's happening? You know what i'm saying so it was like youtube. Just was not a priority for me, um, that's so crazy that just got me so teary-eyed. Oh my gosh um. It was not a priority to me. I really need to figure out um how to make some money is really what it was. Makeup is my passion, but i also had to focus on that and then i was like okay, when that is where i want it to be. I'M gon na come back. Sorry y'all, my camera died and i was able to get myself together um. But what was i saying was i saying was i saying yes, i wanted to do youtube so bad, but again i had to just figure out um my life first, you know it wasn't. Making any money, and especially like that, goes back to the question about how like has influencing change back then like it wasn't really, in alia, just talked about this in her um chit chat, um, making money wasn't really a thing back then or talked about so people May have been making money, but i wasn't looking at it now as like. Oh if i do youtube, i can make the same or if not more doing, that makeup was my source of income. You know now when people look at influencing they're like oh, if i do this, and that i'm gon na have a bentley like leah congrats to her by the way. But you see what i'm saying like there's things now that you see that you can be like.