Relaxed Hair Rules I Don'T Agree With | My Views On Relaxed Hair Community Rules

The first rule that i do not agree with in the relaxed hair community is the stretching versus non-stretching whole debate rule whatever you want to call it. This isn't necessarily a rule. This is just a debate that i feel like we get into a lot within the relaxed hair care community. Some, ladies, do not stretch their relaxer and will relax their hair as early as six to eight weeks. Some ladies only get two relaxers a year. Some ladies do 20 weeks. Some ladies, do sixteen some ladies, do twelve, some lazy fourteen it that there's so many different things that go within this, and so i try not to advise you guys, okay! Well, i think you should stretch - or i think you don't should not stretch. I also don't look down or frown upon someone based on whether they decide to stretch or not stretch, because really i feel like this has to do with more so the individual, your specific hair type, how you take care of your hair, there's so many the products That you're using there's so many different things that go into um number one. If you should be stretching well, i'm not gon na say. Should i let let's say this, there are so many different factors that go into the success that someone is going to have stretching versus the stretch versus the someone else not stretching okay and i'm gon na go ahead and break those down quickly for you guys for What i think so number one, i think stretching is going to determine a lot based on the virgin hair that you were born with that you have coming out of your scalp. That is going to greatly impact your stretching situation and let me explain a little bit further. So if you are someone who has um like a kinkier type, texture hair, your hair is more coarser um than the next person. You might have a harder time stretching your hair versus someone else, because the two textures are going to be completely different versus if you're someone who has more finer hair, more softer natural version, hair that comes in you may not really experience this big deal with your Hair when it comes to stretching also how you take care of your hair and what type of products that you're using, if you are someone who um is very own it with their relaxed hair routine, you know what products your virgin hair likes. You know what type of products your relaxed, hair likes and you're able to kind of marry the two and you have products that work well for you. You have the time and the patience to put into your hair. You are more likely to be able to stretch for longer periods of time than someone else. So that's really all i'm gon na say about that. I'M not gon na, say. Oh, you know: um stretching causes breakage or stretching does not cause breakage um stretching causes you to have thicker hair. I'M not gon na say that, because everyone is completely different, i have stretched. I have not stretched. Currently, i think i am about 12 weeks post relaxer and i'm loving my hair like this. It'S very thick um and i'm loving it, but i'm just doing this because i am here on youtube. I make hair videos, so i kind of have to test different things out to determine what is best for me, so that i can bring you guys the best content, but you guys don't really have to do that. Just because you see me doing something, or just because you're seeing another relaxed hair person on youtube doing something that doesn't mean you know you should do that or that that's what's best for you, because you may need to get your relaxer at eight weeks. You may not can stretch to 12 to 14 or, however long that i'm doing so, that's why i don't really like to engage in this. I don't like to point the finger and say that someone's wrong based off a decision that they want to make for their hair because y'all know, like i said before what sally may can do ray cane. So i'm not going to judge the next woman based on what she thinks is best on her hair, what her hair needs and um what may not be best for her hair as far as stretching or not stretching. The second rule that i do not follow in the relaxed hair community is, i do not use a live relaxer. I know a lot of people when i first started watching youtube videos on relaxed hair. I saw a lot of ladies using just the lie. Relaxers. I saw a lot of ladies um, i don't say advertising. I know something i can't think of words i'm supposed to say, but i guess um, not advertising. That'S not. The right word advocating, i guess for you to use um live relaxers and why relaxers are the best, and this is what you should be using. No, i do not use live relaxers, mainly because you know i pretty much always relax my hair at home or always had someone to relax. My hair at home. I'Ve had the best experiences of getting relaxers at home, whether it was my mom doing it. My friend doing it or me doing it, i have had the best um results of relaxers at home. I did have someone that used to relax my hair a long time ago when i was a child. When i was in high school, she did amazing but other than her and other than when i had a short haircut. I have used box relaxers and i have not had a problem at all. I absolutely love the relaxer that i use. I use the cream of nature relaxer system, it's very gentle, it still leaves texture behind it doesn't have um. A lot of the strong um smells that some of the other relaxers um that i've used in the past have - and i just really really like this relaxed. I'Ve never had an issue with over processing with this relaxer and i really enjoy it, and i have always experienced minimal to no burning with this relaxer and that's why i use the no lie relaxers, because i have very sensitive, scalp so um. For me, the lie. Relaxers are just a little bit stronger. They process a little bit faster, i'm not professional, i'm doing this by myself at home. So i use the no lie relaxers because for me they have been more gentle on my scalp in the past. When i have gone to the salon and used live relaxers, i have been burned. I'Ve been burned severely to the point where my last relaxer in the salon actually made me want to go natural, and i went natural for a few years, because i had severe burning and severe scalp irritations. Now this may be due to other factors. It may not have been the relaxer, but because this was my experience, i do not use um live relaxers and another reason why i don't use wire relaxers and why i just like to go ahead and get the one. That'S in the box is because i like the products that already come in the box. Okay, i like the fact that my relax, but i don't got to do nothing. I just go, buy one box. Okay, everything is in the box. The shampoo is in the box. The conditioner that goes with the relaxer line is in the box. The relaxer that i use also um comes with a protein treatment. If i get the the one, the plex one that comes with the protein treatment, it comes with gloves, it comes with instructions, it comes with everything already in there. So that's why i'd be rocking with that one. But you know, if you ask someone who does hair, it wouldn't be a big deal for me to buy neutralizing shampoo and already have it on hand. I already have conditioners to use with the relax. I already have gloves. I already have tools, so i really don't. Um just have to have the box relaxing system because of the components i just really like the products that come in the cream of nature relaxer and that's why i just continue to purchase that one over and over again and plus, like i said, i've had very Minimal to no um scalp irritations with that one. I stick to that one. If it ain't broke, don't fix it, i'm glad the lie is working for y'all, but for me, i'ma choose to go with the no lie over here. The third rule that i do not follow when it comes to the relaxed community is, i do not treat my relaxed hair completely different than i treated my natural hair now. I know this gone some of y'all for a whirlwind, but let me explain exactly what i mean okay, so what i mean by this is basically all the steps that i do to my natural hair. I do to my relaxed hair, if not even more now. Relaxed hair for me does not take as much of my time as my natural hair took, but i still have to put in the work to have healthy hair. Now let me explain even further so with my relaxed hair y'all know i do a coconut free food. Every single time i wash my uh relaxed hair, i did a coconut pre-poo every so every single time i did my natural hair. Okay, i deep condition every single time i do my relaxed hair. In fact a lot of the times. I have multiple steps of deep conditioning, so i might use one deep conditioner and then i might use another deep conditioner, just based off of what my hair needs or if i have the time or what i'm feeling like when i was natural, i deep condition. Okay, most time i only use one, but i would deep condition with my natural hair as well. With my relaxed hair, i usually leave in natural hair. I use the leave-in with my relaxed hair. I do what i consider low manipulation, styling and what i mean by this is i style, my hair typically once per week and typically for me, that is a flat iron. I may throw a little legions in there a little bit of curls whatever just to have. Somebody just have some movement: okay, just have some razzle dazzle, i'm being extra right now, but y'all get the point okay, so i do that once a week now, typically, i don't have to continue to restyle my hair with my hair um needing a relaxer. Sometimes i do throw in some rollers just to make sure my hair stays in place maintains that body, because when my roots are very thick, sometimes my hair doesn't lay right. So i have to kind of get it to lay exactly how i want to lay so sometimes i do throw rollers in at night sometimes, but for the most part, when my hair is good to go, you know anything before eight weeks. I pretty much. Do my hair like this, i tie it down and wrap it down at night and i'm good. I don't have to manipulate it throughout the week. I don't have to use the flat iron throughout the week. I don't have to do any of that. My hair is good to go same thing. When i was natural, i would do a style. I would do my style when i was natural with two braids two braids and i would crisscross them like a halo style. That was my favorite style. When i was natural or i would do a bun or sometimes i would do roller skis, but i would do these styles once sometimes i would um take it down and redo it, maybe once more throughout the week, but y'all get the point like. I really keep my hands out of my hair gross if i'm natural relaxed whatever i don't, have my hands in my hair. A lot because i feel, like you know when you constantly messing with your hair, constantly doing stuff to it. You'Re just manipulating your hair. More and you could possibly um have more breakage that way, so i just don't really do that and another thing that kind of goes on with this rule, and i guess is what i'm really trying to say is i don't like the fact that some people, you Know um think that they're gon na get a relaxer, and just you know, they're not gon na - have to put the work into their hair. They'Re not gon na have to do their hair anymore. Really. To me, i have to be even more on it when it comes to my hair with a relaxer, because with it being chemically processed, it is altered. So with it being altered, you know the ph might be off um. It could tend to get drier. My bonds might be weaker, so i might need more protein. There could be all types of things going on so because of that i have to stay even more on it than i was when i was natural. That doesn't mean that i'm spending more time. It just means i have to be on it. I have to be cognizant of this type of products, i'm using. I have to make sure that i'm staying on top of my trims. I just have to be honest, so i don't abide by that rule. I don't agree with the rule that relaxed hair is just should be completely treated different than natural hair, or that you know you're not going to have to work with your relaxed hair, you're still going to work and um. In some cases, you might even be doing um a little bit more or you might even find yourself upping your game with your hair care, just to make sure your hair stays top-notch and where it needs to be. The fourth thing that i do not agree with in the relaxed hair community - and i have heard a lot of people say this and i'd be so perplexed and confused when i hear i'm gon na, say y'all. But when i hear people say this, is i don't agree that the hair is weakest when it's wet? I know this is probably so random, but i don't agree with that and i get so confused and so just confused when people say this, because my hair needs to be drenched and stopping wet for me to thoroughly be able to detangle it. For me to be able to go through it and not be scared of any type of breakage, or anything like that, i love detangling, my hair in the shower letting the water run through it, letting it just be drenched the comb glides easily through my hair. Also, when my hair is moisturized okay, when i got when i just did my moisturizing deep conditioner, when i just added my leave-in, my comb just glides through, and i have less to no breakage at this point now. Let me try to comb through my hair. After it's been set and dried for a minute with no product, no nothing on it and it's just been dried. Okay, i'ma hear all types of snap, crackling and popping going on and i'ma have some hair in my tongue. So i don't know why people say this, but i completely disagree with this and if you're someone who has had issues with shedding um you've had issues with breakage, um and you've been following this rule. I would encourage you to maybe maybe only if you've been having issues, try something a little bit different, because i never detangle my hair when it's dry or i just. I don't do that, and i don't understand why people say that. So if y'all know and if i'm wrong, let me know in the comments, because i'm always down for a little constructive criticism, especially if i didn't got it wrong and i got it mixed up, but i'm just a little bit confused. Why people say this? Those were my four rules of the relaxed hair care community that i necessarily do not agree with. There is nothing wrong if you abide by any of these rules. I just kind of don't agree with it or have my little own little spin, my own take on things, but let me know is there something that i said in the video that you disagree with or that you have your own take on? Let me know, because i'm interested in hearing your thoughts - and i thank y'all so much for watching this video. I will see y'all in the next one. Bye