Coronavirus Fears Are Reshaping Global Facial Hair Trends
- Posted on 27 February, 2020
- Trending
- By Anonymous
The president of the American Association of Evil Villains is here with an important message about facial hair in the age of the Coronavirus. #Colbert #Comedy #ColdOpens
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The Late Show with Stephen Colbert is the premier late night talk show on CBS, airing at 11:35pm EST, streaming online via CBS All Access, and delivered to the International Space Station on a USB drive taped to a weather balloon. Every night, viewers can expect: Comedy, humor, funny moments, witty interviews, celebrities, famous people, movie stars, bits, humorous celebrities doing bits, funny celebs, big group photos of every star from Hollywood, even the reclusive ones, plus also jokes.
> >, IN LIGHT OF THE CORONAVIRUS, THE C.D.C. HAS RELEASED A CHART ON FACIAL, HAIR AND RESPIRATORY PROTECTION.. The CHART ILLUSTRATES WHICH TYPE OF FACIAL HAIR IS COMPATIBLE WITH FILTERING FACE PIECE: RESPIRATORS., FACIAL HAIR, LIKE SOUL PATCH, IS COMPATIBLE., FU, MANCHU AND IMPERIAL ARE NOT WHILE VILLAIN COULD GO EITHER. Way. ♪ ♪ ♪, >, >, HELLO, I'M ZIRSIE, ZENDOR LEVAY, PRESIDENT OF THE AMERICAN ASSOCIATION OF EVIL. Villains., YES, GO DO EVIL.. Our RELEASE OF THE CORONAVIRUS HAS GONE SWIMMINGLY., BUT UNFORTUNATELY IT'S HAD EXPECTED CONSEQUENCES. A BIT OF AN OOPSY-DAISY.. You SEE RECENTLY THE C.D.C. RELEASED NEW FACIAL HAIR GUIDELINES COMPATIBLE WITH A FACE RESPIRATOR.. This IS THE ACTUAL CHART PUT OUT BY THE C.D.C., AS YOU CAN SEE, IF YOU'RE A LESS-FLAMBOYANT NE'ER-DO-WELL SAY A RUN-OF-THE-MILL BAD GUY OR ADOLF HITLER, YOU'RE FINE.. But WHAT IF YOU HAVE MORE PANACHE LIKE EVIL, SPOCK OR A DEPRESSION-ERA, DASTARDLY TYCOON, THEN YOU'RE OUT OF LUCK.? That'S WHY I'VE DEVELOPED A LINE OF EVIL FACIAL HAIR, SURGICAL MASKS CALLED THE `` VILLAIN'S VEIL'' PERFECT FOR DESPOTIC RULERS OF DISTANT PLANETS, A SINISTER VIDEO GAME, ARCHRIVAL OR TED CRUZ.. So PICK UP ONE TODAY, BECAUSE EVIL DOES N'T. Take A SICK, DAY., ♪, ♪, ♪, (, LAUGHTER, ), ( APPLAUSE, )'', THE VILLAIN'S VEIL, ,'', LOOK FOR IT WHEREVER WEATHER CONTROL MACHINES ARE SOLD.. > >, IT'S ``, THE LATE SHOW WITH STEPHEN COLBERT .''
Comments
dafttool: Fun facts, back in 1900, many European militaries actually required facial hair on their soldiers. But once WW1 came, with its horrific chemical warfare, soldiers became increasingly more clean shaven so that their gas masks could properly protect them. *The More You Know....*
4tune8 chance: Just got love the comedian that can ad-lib on the fly like that. Purrrfect.
TWSTF 8: Hahaha that cat was like "WHOA! I'm out!"
FlameAdder: Hahaha, the cat just nope'ing right out of there
New Message: I think he just single handedly saved the Steampunk Cosplay Convention.
Space Force Commander: Great product! It was getting really difficult to tell the good guys from the bad guys.
Fuzzy Murder Mittens: I love that they managed to work the uncooperative cat into the skit :D
Deona Flowers: This is also a great ad for what it's like to be a cat "owner".
Brad Hansen: Ordering a cat to do evil -- talk about redundant! ✋
saiyajedi: Does *anyone* (apart from the occasional elderly Japanese guy who never got the memo) sport a toothbrush mustache anymore? That’s, like, the sole domain of Charlie Chaplin and Adolf Hitler.
moinmoin: I'm waiting for Trump to do his sharpie thing on the chart...
Nonofya Bidnez: Yes, go do evil! Haha good save xD
Pat Lynch: "Evil doesn't take a sick day!" I think the Trump administration has proven that quite adequately.
João Rita: This was meant as a joke, but this *exactly* why Hitler had that short moustache. Before WWI he had a regular, full width version, but this did fit into the gas masks of the time, so he (and others of the time) had to cut it down to fit.
farscape: Evil Spock wasn’t that evil because he was logical, too.
Movie & Series Clips: Even the cat couldn't sit still
M. Kitt: Lol I’m glad you guys poked fun at this. How silly!
AmbiguousInfluence: Ya know, weather control machines would actually be genuinely useful.
Chelsea k: My eyes were closed laughing the whole whole time, had to rewatch
Qui-Gon Jinn: That's what they should call Trump's hairstyle the villains Veil
Maryam Zafar: " look for it wherever the weather control machines are sold".
yogiyoda: Ted Cruz: “WHY AM I PERSECUTED?!” Mwahahaha
𝔻𝕖𝕧𝕚𝕝_𝕋𝕣𝕒𝕧𝕖𝕝𝕤: That was actually a pretty interesting facial hair style.
Matthew Sawyer: The Trump PSA is the same as the Bush Jr PSA, "Don't Get Sick"
Derp-Construction: As a aficionado with a Dali and a lengthy Goatee, this is relevant to my needs. Now to determine if they are compatible with my Deep Diaphragm Evil Laugh™.
Jay Luck: Stephen, this is for you! This guy reminds me of character Billy Van would have played on 'The Hilarious House of Frightenstein'. It's a Canadian thing, eh. SCTV, Second City,
Opus 313: I'm more of an Evil Spock myself, but nice to see 'Zappa' on the chart!
Street Peter: I honestly thought it would just be a plague doctors mask
tiny99990: CDC *releases facial hair guidelines for face masks* one day later CDC "PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD STOP BUYING FACE MASKS WE HAVE A SHORTAGE AND NEED THEM FOR OUR HEALTH PROFESSIONALS!" people really need to think about shit before they do it good god man...
Kiwi Trekkie 🇳🇿: 1:33 Would it be "evil" to buy a weather machine and use it to undo global warming?
Cristian Lopez: Dammit and I wanted to gro a beard. I guess I have to choose between Villain and Toothbrush.
croc glox: Those masks will be a huge hit at this year's CPAC. Of course they will still need to replace the handshake with some sort of salute.
Promoted Firebird: He's so funny!
Basile Gruel: Fun fact : Hitler's stach had this look because it was masgask compatible (he kept that from ww1 trenches) I'll take my free Godwin point and leave.
**: So my curled handlebar moustache is considered “Villian”? I think I’m ok with that
Jason Jimerson: I see we finally found where Trump and his cabinet go to meet in their off times.
Ilena Starbreeze: wait cdc released a facial hair thing, like ... legit?
Jh5578: I'm not going to take a blade to my beard and end its life just for a chance of saving mine, we're so close, we've been together for years. Never shaving!!!
Tech Dept. Gentech: the cat: OMG ! time to flee !
xKiSuGix: The logo looked so *"Post-Hardcore"* I thought it was a *Pierce the Veil* reference :D #VillainsVeil #PierceTheVeil
sʇuǝɯɯoɔ pɐǝɹ I op ʎɥM: So I guess Hitler's mustach is called the "the toothbrush"
victor martone: I miss Brian Stack's hey day...
Marjorie Dawes: 콜베어 왜케 긔엽냐ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ 재롱둥이ㅋㅋㅋㅋ
Fishleg Studio: I’m going to need one of those
inSpihr: Lol guys that cover their faces with facial hair into perpetuity are getting sweaty right now.
Lapis Lazuli: Oh you know that cat will do evil! ❤
Mahmoud El Arch: Cat wanted none of that, leaves early !
Ann: There will be a lot of trumpeters wondering where they can buy this mask and..... A weather machine.
Tyrant-Den: Psshaw! What poser *buys* a weather machine? Kits or go home!
Kyle Stubbs: “Or Ted Cruz.”
Richard Darlington: You can find weather control machines by Tandy at your nearest Radio Shack store.
The Orcbutt: OH NO!!! We're going to lose ZZ Top!
Xurde62: Can I wear one safely if I also have mullet?
Malcadon: Weather-Controller? You mean the Cobra brand Weather Dominator™?
micash: That cat wanted OUT lol
Napoléon I Bonaparte: A lot of people will do the Hitler-stache
Alex Landherr: No mention of Ernst Stavro Blofeld?!!
Charles Nguyen: It's all fun and games now.. just wait till everyone is clean shaven..
Sussex Sandra: This one wasn’t funny. Still my favourite is the Mike Pompey Day-o sketch.
The Great Catsby: Ted Cruz
Cachi -: They taped Stephen’s right ear, anybody noticed?
CynAnne1: No doubt Mssr. LaVey represented by the sterling legal team of "Galino and Farnes"... "1-800-We'll-Flip-On-U"
mori1bund: 1:16 - Hail Ming The Merciless!!! Rightful ruler of Mongo!
T BZ: Sometimes the produces need to say no to the writers.
Marc Kloosterman: But that's *_the Interruptor_* !
O. B.: From which game do I know that backdrop?
Kuryux: Where is the image so that we can spread the meme?
nman4k: Good, 99% of people with beards look awful
a619ko: Toothbrush = Hitlerstash
Andy Smith: uh oh, looks like I'm in trouble.
Benzaiten: what little money the CDC gets is wasted on such useless nonsense.
insayn: Lmao
corey: It's me! The interruptor!
Makki9119: Poor cat is camera shy
Richard C.: Is that Stephen?
Sophia's Emporium: CDC needs to accept H-O-M-E-O-P-A-T-H-Y . Bravo for artistic endeavors though.
Hannah: Good. I hate facial hair
Suzanne Potts: Umm... Aren't cats always evil?
Ç Jenkins: Not Funny "Cough" "Cough"
Ginger Redshoes: ___ Zandor LeVey
fashnek: So much effort for something so unfunny.