Stop Slippage| 11 Things You Can Do To Remedy Sisterlocks And Microlocks Slippage

Hello, everyone. What are we talking about today, we're talking about today? I have a few notes on my phone we're talking about today's slippage, because slippage is a pretty big issue. Slippage is a little different than unraveling, but essentially some of these tips can can kind of apply to both. Let me find my notes, because i don't want to leave anything out. I felt like i could talk about this without notes, but i don't want to leave anything out, because this is a pretty important issue shout out to the lovely olivia in stone crescent georgia, who i talked to today on the phone she was having some um slippage Issues along with the ends being left out, along with the size and look of her locks. She was beautifully dispositioned to take the time to share with me what she's been going through in her lock journey with her loctition and she's very positive, and she seems to be making every effort to try and resolve some of these issues with her loctition. But she might end up having to take her locks out and start over, and i really hate that for you all. I hate that, for you all and that's why making a a decision to choose the right loctition, which sometimes you can't avoid until you actually get into the thick of it, but sometimes trying to find the right person can be a challenge but trying to find the Right person is a necessity and it's kind of a buyer. Beware: environment! These things cost too much. Imagine ordering a leather sofa and it coming to you and it doesn't have any kind of warranty, and once it's yours, it's yours and you can't return it. That'S how these locks are once they're installed, improperly or in a very dysfunctional way or inadequately you're, stuck with trying to fix them and doing uh breakdown, maintenance or you have to get them out if that doesn't work. So this is a major major caveat, because the slippage that she has is not necessarily from an incorrect install, but it is a reality and, coupled with other things that you might encounter on your sister lots journey as you go through it, it can be very frustrating And i feel like there's some things that you can do in this journey to kind of help with that, to help mitigate it or to help reduce it, so that at least you can continue on your journey without feeling like you want to pull your hair out Or take your locks out, so i'm tunisia, ali you're at tunisia's locks, beauty, chips and potpourri, and if you have not purchased my book manifesting your masterpiece, it is not a chapter book, it is a daily read by date. You can start with the day of the week. You can start of your birthday, you can start anywhere, but it is to help you on your healing journey. It'S going to help you in shifting your mindset getting your life on track, um healing and clearing your emotional scars and wounds so that you can manifest the glory of god that is within you, so that book can be purchased uh via amazon. So let's talk about this oil thing and by the way, if you're interested in my product line, you can find the information in the description i am melanie. Magic is where you get your magical health for hair growth, serum and the premium product, which is the hair oil, which is wonderfully uh. Helping you to grow your hair, maintain it condition it keep it moisturized, revamp it. It'S anti-bacterial anti-funk, it's anti uh, anything that it helps. You know deal with frizz detangling. It'S going to really help you to fortify your hair and strengthen it and to grow it. The more consistent you are with using it, the more you're going to achieve results similar to these, whether you are dyeing your hair or not, or whether you have thinning hair or you have lock issues with your edges with other things related to your hair, scalp problems. Dandruff itching all of those things this blend the premium blend will definitely help you with all of those things. The magical, hair growth serum is going to condition and help you work with those problem areas that one is more medicinal just so that you get an idea. What i'm talking about this is the magical um. This is the magical, hair growth, serum the label. I'Ve changed it, but it's four ounces. It'S um, something you use spot treatment. Less is more! These products are very concentrated. You don't need a lot of them. This is the magical, hair growth oil, it sprays on okay, you use this all over or you treat problem areas. Okay, so anyway, moving right along we're talking about slippage now, unraveling most people agree, is what they talk about when they talk about the lock opening from the bottom and opening up and just kind of separating slippage kind of starts to happen at the top. Most people will say bottom line either one of them the lock, starts to come out. If it's slippage, it may be in very soft areas, very thin areas, areas around the back areas that hold and carry more moisture or are exposed to more moisture, say if you swim or you go to the sauna or you work out these areas around here, which Tend to either be thinner, sometimes they tend to be a different grade of hair because you know, even though we are of the kinky, the kink in our hair, uh diaspora. We have so many wave patterns and qualities of our kinks and our beauty, and so just because you have one texture of hair here doesn't mean you have same thing here here and here and so forth and so on. So this is kind of important because, like i was, i did a video um when you see this video, when i put this one in the queue the video i'm getting ready to, reference should have come out about a week or two prior to. I did a video today where i added an extension. This is my own lock, which i pulled from the back. I had an area that was just slippage. It'S slippage: it's slippaged for five years, three years, four years, five years, i have a couple other areas and the has the hair got thicker and longer from what i was doing to help my hair grow. I needed to separate it and i wanted to hold on to it. I didn't just want to allow it to just stay there and be loose and stay short. I wanted to continue to grow it down, so i needed, but it kept slipping out each time. I would get my hair re-tightened or when i would wash it, it would just find a way to just sort of disentangle so uh. I finally grew it to about this length and i needed to put something else on it. Besides a regular extension because that weighed it down and eventually began to thin the lock, which is what happens with these extensions, at least in my experience - maybe not yours. So today i did a video where i just kind of i guess you could say jackknifed. I kind of rigged it where i got the extension and it's not perfect, it's not as thin, but it's enough for me to be able to continue to grow this thing out. So i put a little uh afro kinky hair in here to thicken it up so that i could then add this lock, because this is very skinny. I didn't have a lot of give. I didn't have a lot of give up here, but i needed to be able to combine them, so it got me to thinking um after i talked to olivia that this would be a video that i want to give you some some tips and some things that Maybe you can do the first thing i want to say is: don't take slippage lightly and don't let your loctition take it lightly, hold them accountable. These are the people that you trust to do your hair. You will find that every loctition is different. Like i mentioned in one of my other videos, rasheeda over here may check every single thing and have every lock identified and tell you exactly what's going on with your hair and what you did wrong and what you did right between the last session and this session. You may have broom hilda over here, who will finish your hair locket types in your home aiken and not tell you that you have lent throughout your hair that some of your locks are are married, that um, whatever whatever you have someone over here. That'S very conscientious and really invested in your hair care journey. You have someone over here who is negligent, who is irresponsible and who has an unethical way of treating clients, and then you have that person that is in the middle. You are the person that is responsible for your hair. You are the one that needs to care about the quality of what you're getting, because you are the one that's paying for it, you're the one that is invested in your hair and you are the one. That'S going to have to go the long haul and you're the one that's going to have to revamp or remediate or reconstitute your hair. When said, optician has fallen down on the job, so it behooves you to pay attention to what is going on with your hair. But more importantly, make sure that you hold your loctition accountable or that you have a very good rapport with them and that when you bring your concerns to them, they can then listen to your concerns and they can offer up solutions if you're experiencing slippage. And you go to get your hair done and your lactician is just like. Oh okay, why you got a lot of locks that slipped back here and they continue moving through your hair or you got all this slippage and they start re-tightening. And then you got a lock, that's crazy on one side is doing something else on the other side or they just they work the rest of your hair and they leave it out and each time you go, it gets more matted or intertwined, and you find yourself At home having to stand with a mirror facing the back of another mirror and impart your hair and figure out something to do on your own, it means that your loctition is not adept at quality control and mitigating client concerns, or they just don't give a darn And they're a little bit neglectful either way it's time to have a conversation with them, but at the end of the day, what's going to happen along your sister lock journey with, i would say at least one out of every two of us or 50 of us Is you're going to end up becoming more creative about the things that you do to try to preserve the beauty of your hair? Why? Because a lot of us are perfectionists. A lot of us chose this style for a reason, because we want a certain look. We'Re very particular, we tend to be very detail-oriented, and we want things to look a certain way, and this journey in and of itself is challenging enough. Trying not to compare yourself to what everybody else is doing having to deal with the awkward stage and all the other changes that occur. While accepting your natural beauty and and stepping into who, you really are, as a beautiful uh, melanated being who is wearing her natural hair or his natural hair in the case of a masculine, that's enough without having to deal with the intricacies of trying to mitigate issues That could have been avoided from the very beginning or did not have to escalate to a point to where now you are considering my take these out, i'm gon na have to go leave my loctition get somebody else to clean up for mess. I can't tell you how many times a fraud has told me that so many of the clients that come to her, especially the folks that i refer from this channel and by the way, i'm sorry she's, not taking anybody else right now she hasn't been taking anybody Else for the last several months, and i'm really sorry her name, though, is ifrage swadd s-u-a-d you can google her in atlanta, georgia and you'll find your information if you want to follow up with her all right, but um she's constantly having to clean up a mess That somebody else made now e frags is very conscientious. Okay, so is naked. Who is my backup person all right if roger installed? My locks e frog maintains my locks when she's doing my hair, even though i wash my own hair when she's doing my hair and she's combing through each time. She goes through another layer. She'S doing this. My locks come out of there looking very different than they do when i go to naika, who is my favorite as well? They'Re both wonderful like tissues, but they have different styles of retightening and you can tell the difference, but they both are very conscientious and i know with either of them. If i was dealing with issues of slippage, they would remedy those situations or they would at least bring it to my attention, or they will offer up some sort of panacea for lack of a better word. So that's what i want to talk about today. Slippage is happening um like or for the reasons i explained at the beginning of the video when it's slipping, it's pulling out from the root and you just got your hair re-tightening and you got this much loose, um hair and then maybe you have a little bit Of the the pattern at the end, but you're looking at it - and you know it's not growth, you have to do something about that. The first thing i'm going to tell you to do about that is get you that little you have to check my last videos on re-tightening get your little craft needle okay. If you have enough of the locked portion at the back, get your little craft needle thread. It and just go up towards 12 o'clock, go around to nine o'clock, go down to six, go over to three or just do uh, twelve, eight and four. Whatever way you wan na, do it something similar to whatever your pattern is. I have a reverse four pattern: do that and try to sew it back up by going through with that pattern like that, you may have to do that every week or every couple of weeks just to keep it tight, it's worth it. That is the first thing. I would suggest that you do in between re-tightenings, because you're not going to always be able to call your lactician. Sometimes you have a location that gets a little. Antsy gets a little bit of an attitude because you have slippage as if that's not what they're there to deal with every day, but if you're the person that's constantly coming to them with issues y'all, i'm just telling you you're going to put some pressure on the Relationship, it's like being in that classroom with that disruptive child who might have adhd and be disruptive who may have some mild behavioral disorders, and every time you have a problem, you call the principal eventually the principle is not coming down to your room to help. You deal with that kid. You'Re gon na have to deal with them on your own. So that's what i'm telling you so that's the first thing get your craft needle and remediate the lock all right. The second thing that you need to do is watch the oil that you put on your hair and the water if you're using oil on your hair, okay, depending upon what your goals are, if you're having problems with itchiness and scratchiness, and all of that you're gon Na have to still use a little oil, but you're gon na have to put it on the scalp. Less is more if you're, using my oil, less is really more because what you're trying to do is you're trying to um mitigate a situation without having to stop using what your hair needs now, what i would suggest is, if you're using this oil, because you have Thinning and you're losing hair and you're dropping locks. You need a tiny bit. You want to use less than what you would normally use if you're using this, you want one spray. You want to use less than what you normally use. If you want to mix this with water all right and shake it up, not the whole thing. Take a little bit out put it in your container, shake it up, really good and then spray, that's good. If you find that that's too much use water and add you a few critical essential oils, make sure you add, lavender, rosemary and um, geranium and frankincense add about two drops each in an ounce of water, double it for two ounces and use that on your hair And see if that mitigates some of your issues, or at least it helps to if it doesn't, you need an oil, a natural oil, something that is very light and you need to use less of it. Water always be braiding and banding as much as you can. You know that when you start to have slippage, wherever it's slipping at it's going to unravel when it gets wet or when it's too moist, so one of the things you can do is just take a bobby pin if it's around the front, take a bobby pin Close it off, because sometimes those areas that slip are too short, they're too short to braid and band. And when you put when you braid and band the masses of your hair, that little piece is still going to be out. Whether it's at the front or the back so in those cases just take a little bobby, pin and put something there. The most important thing to understand is you want to keep that hair from moving until you're able to blow dry it, which is my next thing? If you're dealing with slippage, when you wash your hair, your hair gets wet, you need to blow dry it as soon as possible. At this time, blow drying is not going to be the end of the world because literally even the excess heat is better than the slippage. That'S going to keep pulling a lock out and keep it from growing to me. It'S the lesser of two eagles, the excess heat. It'S going to roughen your hair up a little bit. It may not be the healthiest thing for it, but it's going to roughen the hair up enough to give you some traction to stop the um unraveling. So that's another option. The the hair is usually thinner and more vulnerable wherever it happens to be uh slipping, especially if it's around the front. So you have to be careful because, let's say, for example, you decided to put something thick on it like beeswax, to hold it that same beeswax. Eventually, along with a little lip and some other stuff, if it's around the edge of your hair, it's going to be able to pull that whole lock of hair out. So you want to stay away from anything. That'S like that! You don't want to use super glue. Have some like tissues use super glue, but for some of my sisters on the channel very sorry you don't want to use that braiding and banding is critical. You want to make sure you always braiding band with your washes, even if you don't think that it's making a difference, it's assisting your hair from slipping some people's hair, like as i'm talking about slips from the back and the front. Some of you have slippage. In other areas, everybody's hair is different. Everybody'S texture is different. You want to wash less clearly clearly you want to wash less. You want to make sure that when you are washing and when i say less like me, i wash between three tightenings one time, usually right before i do a re-tightening, every blue moon i will wash in between every tightening, but with me using this stuff. On my hair and it taking care of my scalp and my scalp being clean all the time, and when i scratch it, i don't see anything on my hands nine times out of ten there's no point in me, washing it, my hair is clean, so i don't Need to wash it, i don't see, build up, i don't feel build up, i don't smell build up, so i don't need to wash it. You determine what wash schedule works for you, but the the less you wash in general, whether it's fur to avoid slippage or anything else, the better off you're going to be. The next thing you want to be mindful of, as i said, is, make sure your loctition is earning her money. You need to ask her. What do i do when she makes a suggestion? You need to say, okay, so if that is challenging me and that is not still working, what is the next thing that you suggest all right and then they'll tell you what to do, and then you say. So what can you do today to help me with that? We have to find a way to put them on the spot if they're taking a more large, fair attitude after you ask, what can i do a plan b, then you have to say so. What can we do today, or what do you feel is a good thing for us to do today in order to bring some resolution to this? It'S important how we talk to people, it's important that when we're trying to give them an idea, what you will often have to do because guys we live in a world. I used to ask my students at school all the time. Why do people die in the wilderness from the movie on the edge? Why do people die in the wilderness? They die because they give up the only thing that could have saved their lives. Thinking, i would ask them. I asked them that for eight years, if they were with me from pre-k to the eighth grade, why do people die in the wilderness? Most people don't think most people don't are not creative problem. Solvers most people are not creative initiators and most people don't look for solutions. That'S why, when i come on this channel, i try to bring you more than just the superficial. By the way i will do an oracle read at the end. If you stick around, i try to bring you things that involve problems that i have solved that i've run across with my hair. I try to talk about things that maybe i hope that you don't see on some of the other channels. I try to get to the nitty-gritty. I try to put things before you to um, provoke and stimulate some thinking around something that i feel is critical that you all have brought to me that i feel needs to be on the table. So that's really what i like to do so when i come to you, i like to have something solid to talk about that, i think can bring you um some sort of clarity on this journey. So that's really important. You got to put the problem where the problem belongs. It'S your problem and it belongs to you, but it also belongs to the location because you paid them and you're continuing to go to them, not just for the re-tightening y'all anybody can re-tighten. I train my daughter to re-tighten my hair and i don't have a lot uh, a sister logs, um certification. I will get a high school student from this booney place. I just moved into to re-tighten my hair. If i don't feel like going back to atlanta with defrost, anybody can re-tighten your hair, but maintaining your hair, keeping it healthy and re-tightening it. Tightening it properly is more than just about that daggone rotation. Anybody can do the rotation. That'S my argument. I would argue anybody can do the rotation. The challenge comes in everything around the rotation, so that your hair is preserved. The sanctuary and integrity of what it is you're trying to grow and invest in is preserved, and you feel good about your lock journey. Okay. So you have to you, have to put some of the responsibility on them because they're looking at your hair, they're the ones that certified or trained - and they got to do something rather than just passively watch. You come in week after week with this problem. However, if they don't, you have to take charge. Okay, so the next thing tease it if that hair has slipped all the way out and it keeps slipping out before you plait it, which is something else you should do. If it's slipping out like that go in and plant it, you can plant it at the top and then go in with the craft needle and stitch up the hole you got to do something to stop the bleeding. That'S my point. You'Ve got to stop the bleeding with the slippage. I think that's going to be the topic, stop the bleeding okay, and what i'm saying is when i say bleeding, i'm talking about like the first um uh level. One of intervention when somebody gets hurt is to stop from bleeding, because if it keeps bleeding it's going to get worse, if the slippage continues, the whole lock is going to come out all right if you're having a problem with slippage, you're going to have locks coming Out all over the place and trust me, you will eventually have a consultant. Maybe who is not too keen on consistently dealing with that and then they're going to blame you? Even if it's not your fault - and you don't want to set up yourself or the lactation put them in a situation where they lose patience with you, where this the relationship gets a little strained, we do want to try to have a working, uh, amicable relationship with The people that we entrust with our hair, especially if we like them and we trust them - we want to try to work with them as much as possible. Now that's different. If you're dealing with somebody whose energy is funky and you're deciding you don't want them in your hair anyway, so when you tease it all right, remember we used to tease out here when we were kids from the bottom, you tease it or you tease it from The middle it's going to get all tangled up and crazy right, that's what the locks do we want. I don't care who says you're gon na break the hair off guess what lesser of two evils here, i'm giving you an option: okay and this stuff, if you were to take it out, it's gon na break off. It'S gon na fall out anyway. Sixty percent of it is coming out and you're gon na be left with the living healthy hair. Okay, that hair, that didn't is not falling out as a result of debris, is not falling out and being messed up as a result of lint all right, and that is, is not falling out because, as you were picking it loose, you were tearing your hair so Either or we're trying to get some type of intervention that can help you on some level, all right so you're teasing it. Then you go in and plant it, it's a little more matted and then you could do the the needle and and shore it up in one or two places. Maybe you want to. Let me stop that. I'M not going to tell you one or two places, because that's what i do if you do it at the bottom and you do it at the top and you do it up here, it is going to affect the way your lock grows. So let me take that back because i don't want as again disclaimer don't do what i say. Consider what i say see if it makes sense to you and individualize it for your journey. Do not come back and tell me you said i should do because i'm not doing that. I'Ve said that many times on the channel. This is what i have done. I'M a non-conformist, i'm a maverick. I don't care. I got almost 600 locks. If i lose a few of them, i'm not gon na die. That'S the way. I feel you may not feel the same way. Okay, but that's what allows me to come on this channel and share my experiences, so i think that's kind of hard for the journey. Okay, so the teasing, the other thing is just to plan it just plaid it that plait is eventually going to loosen up again and it too is going to slip, and you got to go in and just keep plaiting it if it's too short to plaque you're Going to have to consider putting an extension on it or doing something else, that's going to keep it from breaking extension. Is the simplest thing teasing. It will give you some a little bit of tangle. The other thing that you can also do - and i wish i had it with me - it is a 0.75 millimeter uh dreadlock tool. It'S really a crochet needle 0.75 millimeter. You have to search it on amazon, it's a crochet needle and all you want to do is take that lock and start rubbing it between your fingers like this and poking it poke it poke it poke it poke it. While you're continuing to rub it, you can go up and down the needle up and down a lot poke it poke it poke it poke it. You want to poke it up vertically, as you're going up and down the lock or not going up and down just going in one place depends on how big or how serious situation is poke it down as you're doing this. This is what the white folks do when they want to have stringy hair one day and then the next day they want to be a part of the african diaspora and they want to walk outside and have a head full of dreads. They tease t's t's t's, t's, okay, i guess they probably got that from us too, or they somehow find a way to tangle the hair. This is a great way to tangle the hair, and what that's going to do is help you now. What you can do is as soon as you get it, re-tightened go home and do that this is going to make it nappy whatever you want to call it kinky it's going to give it some traction. Some friction go home and do the heck out of that and see if you can't generate enough roughage to keep the hair in place and go back periodically and check it out. The other thing is you never want to use conditioner you never want to use conditioner. You don't want to use conditioner. Okay, conditioner is going to soften your hair too much you want to wash the shampoo you're using you don't want to be using conditioning shampoo. You want to use soap, that's going to give your hair some roughage and make it rough. Um, i do have a video coming out on dawn dawn, makes your hair very rough, probably regular soap. I use the dr broner's y'all know that on the channel i had a recipe for the shampoo i've been using for many years, but that shampoo does have a little bit of oil in it. So if you're going to be using that recipe - and i can't give you the link to it - you have to search the channel just type in miracle. Shampoo miracle grow shampoo. If you're using that, then don't put the oil in it, add more water to the formula, and it's going to make your hair tighten up like this. It'S going to bring it in like this, it's going to create a little traction and constriction. That'S going to be very helpful for you. The other thing is this: video always gets long securing it. This is what i would do as a last result, and this is because i used to do hair weaves in college, and i used to wear a weave for many years. I used to do the sew in, and so i would just take some of that. Hair thread and i would stitch it up - i wouldn't stitch it at the bottom and go in like that, because you're gon na do it like this, and then it's not going to get enough oxygen. It'S not going to be able to move. I would just this is an experimentation thing. This is something you have to figure out. I would go in at key points and i would shore up that lock with a needle and thread. You may find that the hair thread is too thick depending upon where the lock is located and you need to get a thinner thread. The point is eventually, the thread is going to break it'll disintegrate because it's made of. Hopefully, if you get cotton thread, it's made of natural fibers, it will eventually disintegrate, or you will eventually cut it out when your hair starts to lock and you'll, be fine. Okay, um. The the last thing that you would have to do is to have your hair taken out and reinstalled, or you know something else. Reinstalling means they go through because when it starts to slip, if they don't handle it properly, y'all it's going to bunch up it's going to be crazy stuff. Your parts are going to be messed up and you're going to be feeling some kind of way, and so, lastly, the last resort, depending upon how many um slipped um locks you have or where they're concentrated, if they're, sporadic and intermittently spaced throughout your hair, not a Problem but you can have a whole side of your hair where um they're slipping. Then you need to to address that entire area and you may have to have your loctition just start over with those locks because it could have become so bunched up. They could be looking so crazy. The grid could be all messed up depending upon the extent of your slippage. I hope that that helps you. I hope that i gave you enough things to kind of think about um easiest thing for all of you to do. Would just be the planet just plait it plant it tight plant, it all the way down. Okay, remember you also have the option of taking that little piece of hair and plating, taking the lock and plaiting it into two tinier ones, and then plaiting that one or three tinier ones and then plaiting that okay, you have the option of doing whatever you need To do to keep it together, so what i mean is take the lock see if you can separate the lock into three tiny little pieces of hair and then either twist those pieces of hair and then plait all three of them or plaque those pieces of hair And then plait the whole hair. These are creative things for you to try. It gives you something to do, besides put all of your um faith and heart and blood, sweat and tears into your loctition, who, for some of you, based on what i hear, aren't doing much anyway, and it gives you something to do besides just sit and look And and not know what to do so, hopefully this video helped if it helped you and you have other suggestions, give it a thumbs up, don't forget to subscribe to the channel, don't forget to purchase my book all right, manifesting your masterpiece, don't forget to go to Ironmelonthemagic.Com and try out these products tried the anti-aging serum shout out to lydia, who said it's been one day and she's already got stuff coming up off of her face. She thinks it's the serum all right, so i love y'all peace wishing you productivity, wishing prosperity and wishing you that i'm going to get you a message for your love life. This is strictly love life all right. So if you want to check out if your love life is going great, then don't pay attention to this message. Just click on off, but this is the people who need messages for their love life. Okay, oh lord y'all. I got obstacles obsession time apart. True, love warning finances, spiritual lesson. If i had to sum all that up, i would say you're having a little bit of difficulties. Financial things could be involved it's time to accept things the way they are manage these obstacles and see what you can do to move forward, but that ain't the message, because that's too many cards, so let me see, give me one message: please give me one message And a primary message at the bottom of the deck to help get clues or to give answers to something that someone on this channel may be listening to in need at this time. Whatever it is, it's trying to get up here trying hard. Okay, we got three longing integrity, different pages. Someone is secretly yearning for you or you're yearning for someone. There'S a pull, there's a sense of wanting to try to resolve something. That'S creating uh some difficulty trying to solve it with some integrity, also maybe yearning about a particular problem, because it doesn't sit well with you something within you is not um vibing. With this situation, you feel that something is wrong that you may not know about, but in this case you probably do know about, but you are either agonizing about it or yearning for some kind of a solution, because this it doesn't fit well with how you want To live or how you want to be in relationship does the situation align with your values and your morals? You guys are on different pages. You and this person don't share the same vision. Okay, this person loves you and you love this person, but you all may be out of alignment in some areas and out of integrity in terms of whatever it is. That'S creating the alignment. Integrity is about morals and values. It doesn't have to be about something crazy to be about something about as simple as you spend money differently than i do, and every month we're behind, because you you you're on amazon all day, you know what i'm saying the bottom of the deck. This is about a spiritual lesson. This person is in your life to teach you a spiritual lesson. When people come into our lives to teach us lessons beautiful sister, like again, they don't feel good and the more that we need the lesson the more uncomfortable. The situation becomes to help us find creative ways to either solve the situation or remove ourselves from a situation that could be taken a toll, but we have that yearning card, but we have two heavy hitters about integrity here and being on different pages. So when it's an issue of integrity, values and morals or being on different pages, you are dealing with something kind of big here. This is a something seriously and when that spiritual lesson card comes up, it's saying that this this this has some karma to it, which means that as well, i'm going to end on a positive note, so i'm going to pull an oracle but as well there's something Larger than just the situation that is at stake here, there is something that you're supposed to be learning about your self-love, your self-worth and setting boundaries and deciding what you'll put up with and what you want. I want to end on something positive, grounded in sacrifice. Many of the most evolved beings on earth are regular folks living with joy and dignity and courage when they are about this deck. You get a concrete message and then you get a higher level message which seems abstract sacrifice. Sometimes surrender is painful, god's cutting away all that needs to go illusions: obsessions addictions, it's a sacrifice to love. So on this note, what i'm going to say to you is stay, put stay put and stay still for right now. This is a season to get the lesson and to see what you can do creatively to be in this situation. Turning around this is a time of sacrifice and staying grounded staying put, but it's the ultimate message here is saying that um try to detach to the degree that you can from the confusion, see if what it is that you're bickering about or what it is that's Causing the separation is big enough to separate you from this person, take a look at your own values and morals and see if what it is that you're holding them to task for is really that important. So in other words, for the temp. For the time being, hold tight, don't just walk out of this situation, if you're already in the process of walking out of something or letting something go. That'S a different story. If this is a a relationship where you don't have a lot invested, and you just started dating this person - that's a different situation as well. They know those cases those people don't deserve oftentimes. If they're they're not towing the line that those situations may not necessarily deserve a um being on a hamster wheel, but this is talking about sacrificing for love. This is talking about morals, values, things that equate with long term and having rolled up your sleeves and put some time in this is not a one-night stand, it's not even a relationship that you've had for a month. Okay, i love y'all. This video is getting long, got, ta, go, got, ta, go talk to y'all soon,